Kodwa ukuba uyayithanda ngokwenene indoda yakho, ngoko ungasebenzisa iingcebiso zethu eziphambili kwiindawo ezichaseneyo: ziya kuba yindlela yokukhubekisa iimvakalelo zendoda ethandekayo.
Indoda yakho isoloko ithembisa into kuwe, kodwa ayiyi kugcina ilizwi lakhe. Ngexesha elifanayo, rhoqo, ufumana inkcazelo enkulu, ngamanye amaxesha ayengacacanga. Ngayiphi na imibuzo yakho enombuzo, umzekelo "ngaba undikhohlise?", Wenza ubuso obothusayo nobutshongo. Ngokwemvelo, uyaqonda ukuba uxoxe nawe.
Ukukhohlisa kufana nantoni na umntu. Unako ukubeka kakubi ubuxoki. Kufuneka kuthathelwe ingqalelo ukuba ibinzana elithi "andikukholelwa" kakhulu litshitshisa le nto. Emva koko, akukho bungqina becala lakhe, kwaye akakwazi ukutshintshwa kwimbono yokuba akayikholwa njalo.
Iseluleko sokuqala esinokuyicaphukisa indoda ethandekayo kukuqala ukungathandabuzeki ngokunyaniseka kwakhe.
Isiluleko sesibini esisebenzayo sinokubangelwa ukungabikho kwesondo. Ngokuchanekileyo, isondo siyanyamalala ebomini bakho obusondeleyo ngokuphathelele umnqweno wakho. Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukutshitshisa indoda yakho ethandekayo, ukumxelela ukuba uyaphoswa kwaye ayiyi kuba nesondo namhlanje - umzimba omncinci.
Iingcali zengqondo zixwayisa ukuba akufanele uqhube uphula umthetho. Kodwa, ukuba uqinisekile ukuba umntu wakho ufanelwe isimo sengqondo esibi kakhulu, ngoko-ke ungabanda kwintsebenzo yakhe kunye nayiphi na into eyenziwa ngokwesini. Kwaye ibinzana elithi "awuyi kundivuyisa" lilungele ukuqhuma kunamandla kumntu ongenanto.
Wonke umntu uye wazi ixesha elide ukuba izihlobo zomntu zingcwele. Xa uqala ukugxeka abahlobo bakhe, ngokukhawuleza uthumele onke amagama akho kwiakhawunti yakho. Kwakhona, kule meko, iingcamango ezimbini zithinteka entloko yakhe: ukukhusela abahlobo bakhe okanye ukuxhasa. Njengomthetho, amadoda akhethe ukhetho lokuqala. Emva koko, aba ngabahlobo bakhe, kwaye bona, i-priori, ayikwazi kuba mbi.
Isiluleko sesine esiluncedo sokumcaphukisa indoda ethandekayo kukubuza ukuba uyakwazi ukuqhuba imoto. Nangona umntu wakho engayazi imigaqo yendlela, kodwa wazuza amalungelo abo abaneminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo ubudala - usenethemba lokuba ungobuchule kwishishini lakhe (iShumhumacher, ngelizwi). Ngoko ke, ukucaphukisa indoda ethandekayo, mxelele ukuba awuboni ngoluvo lwakhe.
Amantombazana ayingqungquthela kodwa izidalwa ezintle. Kwabanye umbono wabo kubalulekile, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba baza kuthatha njani umntu omtsha kuluntu. Intombazana ihlala ilandela indlela yokuziphatha komyeni wakhe oyintanda: njani kunye noko athethayo, indlela enxibe ngayo nendlela eziphatha ngayo. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba lo mntu akayi kudaka ebusweni bakhe (kodwa, ngokwembono kwintombazana ngokwakhe) kwaye akazange amenze adibanise phambi kwabantu abangaziwa.
Amadoda akhathazeke kakhulu xa behlala belungiswa kwaye behlazekile ngenxa yokuziphatha kwabo.
Unokumcaphukisa umntu oyintanda ngokumxelela izinto ezilandelayo: Andiyi kuqiqa; ungenza ndibe ngunaphakade. Kodwa, mantombazana, khumbula ukuba ngokukhawuleza ukuba iingcinga ezibonakala entloko yakho, unokuthi ulwalamano lwakho aluhlali ixesha elide. Akunakwenzeka ukuba indoda ifuna ukudibanisa intlekele yakhe intombazana ehlala eyicinga ukuba ayiphumeleli.
Amantombazana ayisoloko engabakhathaleli amadoda abo. Yonke intokazi ifuna ukuziva ithandwa, ndifuna ukuthatha isithandane kunye nezipho. Kodwa, ngelishwa, amadoda ahlale efika kwingcamango yokuba zonke ezo zinto zothando ziyimfuneko kakhulu kulwalamano.
Abasetyhini abavame ukuvavanya kakuhle igalelo lomntu kulwalamano. Inyaniso yokuba wakulethela iintyatyambo, isidlo esiphekiweyo, washiya ishishini lakhe kukunceda - ngokuba ungokoqobo. Le ndoda icinga ukuba iphelele kuwe. Kwaye kucacile ukuba emva kwezenzo zobuqhawe, ufuna ukuva indumiso okanye ubuncinane igama elilodwa. Yaye yintoni ekupheleni? Uhlala ungonwabi kwaye umxelele ukuba awufumani ncinane.
Ukuba awufuni ukucaphukisa intanda yakho, khuthaza zonke izenzo ukuba uzive ulungile. Emva koko, wena ngokwakho awuboni ukuba uza kukubonisa njani ngakumbi.
Esinye isicatshulwa sendlela yokucaphukisa indoda ethandekayo kukugxininisa iimpazamo zakhe kunye nokuphosa. Amadoda, ngokwemvelo yabo, abathandi ukuvuma iimpazamo. Kwaye xa bebanjwe kulo mntu osondeleyo kwaye othandekayo - intombazana ethandekayo - oku akukho mnandi ngokuphindwe kabini.
Enye ingongoma: ukugxeka ukuthenga nokuphumelela komntu othandekayo. Khawucinge nje: indoda yakho yachitha inyanga ihamba ijikeleze iindawo zokubonisa iimoto zifuna ihashe yodwa yensimbi. Kwaye kwafika iyure - wathenga imoto ukuze ayisebenzise. Uvuyo nonwabe luyadlula intliziyo yakhe. Iingxelo zakho zokungathembeki kuphela zingonakalisa ukuziphatha kwakhe. Ngokomntu, ucinga ukuba le moto ayinakwenzeka, ukuba inokuthengwa kakhulu.
Ukuqokelela iziphumo kwisihloko sethu: "iingcebiso ezisebenzayo zokumcaphukisa indoda ethandekayo", kuyafaneleka ukuba siqaphele ukuba ngamnye wethu unamaqondo abuhlungu. Amadoda ngabantu abanayo, ngeemvakalelo zabo kunye neemvakalelo zabo.
Ngaphambi kokuba usebenzise iiluleko zethu, cinga: uyayifuna? Ngaba ufanelekile ngenxa yezinto zakho ezingento, ukucaphukisa umntu othandekayo kunye nokuphanga ubudlelwane?