Ngokuqinisekileyo, yonke ibhinqa ubuncinane kanye ayifuni ukulala ngesondo nomyeni wakhe. Akunjalo nokuba ungatshatanga kangakanani, ungayifumana ngokupheleleyo nanini na. Yintoni enokuyenza ngayo?
Kutheni ungafuni ukulala ngesondo?
Ukuze kulungiswe ingxaki, kuyimfuneko ukuqonda izizathu zalo, ngenxa yento eyenzekayo.
- Ukucamngca kwisibuko, ukubeka ngokuthobeka, akukhuthazi. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abafazi abayeke ukuzithandayo, bayeka ukuba nomnqweno wendoda. Kule meko, lo wesifazane uloyiko lokuba into iya kuhamba kwaye akayi kumthanda umyeni wakhe.
- Umntwana ubonakale. Njengomthetho, kunye nokuzalwa komntwana, ubomi besondo obuqhoqhokisayo buba lubi. Kwaye izizathu ezininzi zibangela oku: ukwesaba ukuba umntwana uya kuvuka kwaye aqale ukukhala, ukukhathala (ikakhulukazi oomama abaselula bahlala bephupha kuphela iphupha), utshintsho lwama-hormonal kunye nokunganeliseki ngenguqu zabo.
- Ulwalamano nomyeni wakhe alunjani. Kuye kwathiwa ukuba ukusondeleka kubonakalisa ubudlelwane beentsapho. Zonke iimbambano kunye neengxabano ziya kufumanisa indlela yokucamngca kwinqanaba elisondeleyo. Kukho amaxesha ukujonga okubuhlungu okanye igama elibi likhokelela ukuba umfazi abe noburhalarhume, uvelise intukuthelo, ayithandi, kwaye entloko inengcamango izalwa: "Andifuni indoda!"
- Akukho mhlobo. Abasetyhini abasele batshatile iminyaka emininzi abafuni ukulala ngesondo kunye nabayeni babo, kuba baye bathatha ubomi babo bemihla ngemihla nobomi. Ngokuqinisekileyo akukho nto ibonayo, yonke ibhedi efanayo, yonke intshukumo elandelayo yendoda oye uyayazi ngaphambili, zonke iimeko ezifanayo, ezisele zinexabiso elincinci, sele zinyanzele kangangokuba iphela iminyaka emibini yokuhlala ndawonye.
- Ukukhathala. Ukunyamekelwa kwabantwana, usuku olungavumelekanga lomsebenzi, inani elikhulu lemisebenzi ejikeleze indlu - konke oku kwenza ukuba uziqaphele ngokwakho, ngaphezu koko, ukuphazamisa umnqweno wokwenza uthando. Ukuba ibhinqa isebenza yonke imini kwaye isebenza kwimisebenzi yasendlini, kwaye ngokuhlwa iyakhwela ebhedeni, ifuna kuphela ukuphumla nokulala, akafuni nokuba acinge ngantoni na, kungekhona ngokulala naye.
- Zokukhulelwa kweeHormon. Ukuba ibhinqa ikhuselwe ngamapilisi, kufuneka ufunde iphepha lephepha. Ingqwalasela ekhethekileyo kufuneka ihlawulwe kwiqendu elithi "Imiphumo yangaphandle". Ngokuqhelekileyo, ezinye izithintelo zokukhusela i-hormonal zinciphisa i-libido, njengombandela, kuboniswe kwiphakheji. Yiya kugqirha uze uxoxe naye ngendlela enokuyenza ngayo le meko, mhlawumbi uya kucebisa ezinye iziyobisi.
Yintoni endiyenzayo?
Okokuqala, cingisisa ngesizathu sokungafuni ukuthanda nomyeni wakho. Ngoku ukuba uyichazile, kufuneka wenze into.
- Awufuni ukuthandana nomyeni wakho, kuba ucinga ukuba ulahlekelwe ngumntu wakho wangaphambili kwaye uyayika ukuba awuyi kuthanda? Emva koko, siyazi ukuba sikwazi ukudala iingxaki ukususela ekuqaleni. Umzekelo, umyeni uthanda ukuba iifom zakho zidibene, akayikucinga ukuba uyinto embi, kodwa sinokuzicingela ukuba i-muzhueto ayithandi kwaye mhlawumbi uyamkhohlisa. Ngaloo ndlela, thabatha ukuzithemba kwakho kwaye ucele ngqo umlingane malunga nezinto ezithandayo, njengawe okanye akunjalo. Ukuba indoda ithi uyakuthanda njalo, akukho nto iyakhathazeka ngayo, kodwa ukuba ingakuboni njengowesifazane othakazelisayo nomhle, ke uye e-salon enobuhle kunye nokuzivocavoca. Zikhathalele.
- Ngaba ulahla ulwalamano lwakho nomyeni wakho ngenxa yokuba uyamoyika? Akazange azalisekise into oyicelayo, ukhohliwe ukuvuyisela umama wakho ngosuku lokuzalwa kwakhe, wavuma ukuyibeka engalungile kwidilesi yakho, okanye ukhohliwe ngeminyaka emibini yomtshato wakho - zikho izizathu ezininzi zokuthi "uqhube umlomo wakho" kwimimoya. Nangona kunjalo, akufuneki ukunyamezela ukuxabana nokuxabana ekamelweni lokulala. Zithembisa ukuba awuyi kulala ude uxolelane okanye ulungelelanise impi. Khawuleza xelela lakho iqabane ukuba awuyithandi, ukuba wenza okungalunganga okanye wathi, mvumele axolise kuwe. Akukufanelekanga ukuba ube ngokwakho, kuba izikhalazo kunye neemvakalelo zenza i-coma enkulu eya kupheka naluphi na umzuzu kwaye uya kulungelelanisa imfazwe yonke kunokuba ixabane.
- Imindeni enezingane ezincinci ifanelekileyo ingqalelo. Amantombazana amancinci, mhlawumbi, cingani ncinane ngabo bonke ngesondo, kwaye ningakhumbuli ngako konke, kuba ngoku okokuqala bangenawo umyeni, kodwa umntwana ozithandayo. Geza, uhlambuluke, unakekele imvuthu, upheke kunye nomyeni wakhe. Abagqwiri bobabili ngabazali, kwaye indoda iyafuna ukukunceda, ukuze ukwazi ukuphumla. Kuba ummelwane ufanelekile kwigumbi apho kungekho mntwana, ukuze kungabikho ukwesaba ukuba i-rooster iza kuvuka, ubone into njalo njalo. Ukuba kunokwenzeka, thabatha umntwana ku-ugogo, cela izihlobo okanye abahlobo ukuba bahlale nomntwana, bathathe uhambo, bazinikezele uthando.
- Ukuba ulala ezinyaweni zakho ngokuhlwa, uzive ukhathele kwaye uphukile, uze uzame ukumema umyeni wakho ukuba akuncede uze uthathele imisebenzi yakho yasekhaya. Ukuba uyavuma kwaye uya kukunceda, uya kuziva ulunge ngakumbi.Ukuba uphelelwe ngumsebenzi, buza intloko ukuba ihambe. Enye indlela ekhethekileyo kukuba uhambe eholide nomyeni onothando. Ngoko ngokukhawuleza utshintshe indlela, kwaye uphumule, kwaye usungula ulwalamano lakho neqabane lakho.
- Zama u kunceda. Zama ukongeza ubaba ebuhlotsheni nomyeni wakhe, ukuba akenzi nto. Zama ukuvuselela iimvakalelo zakho ngesidlo sakuthandana, ikhandlela, uphakamise iimpapa, umculo omnandi, udale indawo eyahlukileyo yokuthandana. Zama ukwenza konke okufika entlokweni yakho, kwaye ungesabi ukubonakala ungenangqondo kunye nokuhlekisa, ngumyeni wakho, yena vospodderzhit. Ukuba unesondo kuphela kwigumbi lokulala, zama ukunyuka ekhitshini okanye ekhitshini. Ekugqibeleni, thatha igumbi ehotele ngobunye ubusuku, uye kwenye idolophu okanye ngokubanzi ukuya kwelinye ilizwe. Zama ukufaka isicelo esitsha, zama ukukholisa umyeni wakhe ngeendlela ezingavamile, ukuya kwisitolo sezesondo, uthenge izinto ezincinane zokudlala.
Yintoni enokuyenza ukuba akukho nto inceda, kwaye andisayi kufuna indoda?
Mhlawumbi umzimba wakho, umzimba wakho, uthabatha ngendlela yokuba ixesha lokuba umyeni atshintshe. Ewe, le yindlela yokugqibela yokuphuma, kodwa, ngelishwa, oku kwenzeka empilweni. Mhlawumbi iimvakalelo zakho ziye zaphela kwaye uyeke ukuthanda umlingane wakho, zama ukuhlala ngaphandle komnye nomnye, mhlawumbi ke yonke into iya kusebenza. Uya kuqonda ukuba uyamthanda kwaye utshintsho olutsha luya kukukhukula. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba akukho nto eyenzekayo kulo mzekelo, ungakhathazeki, kuba ubomi bubunye. Khumbula ukuba ngamanye amaxesha kungcono ukukhetha iindlela zokufumana ulonwabo kwaye unike ithuba lokufumana umyeni wakho. Uthande kwaye uthandeke!