Ngaba ukubonakala kwindoda ebalulekileyo kwintombazana?

Umzekeliso odumile uthi amadoda athande amehlo, kwaye abafazi baneendlebe. Kukho inani elithile le nyaniso kule nto, kwaye oku akuqinisekanga nje kuphela ngokwahlukahlukana komzimba phakathi kwesakhiwo sengqondo yomntu kunye nomfazi.

Iinkqubo zentlalo nazo ziphazamisa. Kwiindinyana ezininzi, uVasilissa unesiqalo esithi "Ubuhle". Kwaye ukuze ube ngowona nto ibalulekileyo, iqhawe eliphambili lempumelelo, indoda ayidingi ukuba ibe yinhle okanye ihlakaniphile. U-Ivan i-Fool ngokuqhelekileyo uthatha ngokuzimela kwakhe kunye nokukwazi ukubona ihlabathi kungekhona njengabalingiswa bakhe abafundayo okanye abaqilileyo bebali.

Ubomi obuqhelekileyo, yonke into iyafana. Iingxelo zefeyibhile zibonisa kuphela into ekhoyo. Kuqhelekile ukuba ucinge ukuba indoda eyindoda enhle iyisisombululo, ukuba yindoda engenazo iimvakalelo. Ukubonakala komntu, njengoko besithi, kufuneka kube yinto encane kakhulu kunokuba idonki. Kwaye amabhinqa amahle, uluvo lukawonkewonke lubonisa iimpawu ezintle kunye neempawu ezilungileyo. Lo mthetho ongatshintshiyo ukwakha ishishini lamaphephancwadi amaninzi adibanisayo afundisa amantombazana nabasetyhini ukuba bahle.

Kodwa ke, amadoda amahle entombazana angathanda ngakumbi kwaye athandeke. Ubuhle ngokubanzi ludlala indima ebalulekileyo kwiinqanaba zokuqala zobudlelwane. Yona ndlela yokuqalisa ukuvelana, okubangela ukuba indoda kunye nowesifazane bafune ukudibana.

Ngokuqinisekileyo, elowo manyana ubuncinane xa bebuza ukuba kubonakala ukuba intombazana ibalulekile kwintombazana? Ayikho impendulo yendalo yonke kwaye ayikwazi. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abantu bacinga ukuba bahle abo bantu, okokuqala, basondele kubo ngokobuhlanga kunye nelizwe. Okwesibini, sibona abahle abo bantu banjengabantu abasuka kwisangqa sethu esiseduze. Iingcali zengqondo ziye zabonisa ukuba kukho izinto ezimbini kuphela zokubonakala komntu ezikhoyo kwiinkcubeko ezahlukahlukeneyo njengendlela yokubakho ubuhle: ukuphakama kokukhula kunye nobukhulu bomzimba. Zonke ezinye iinkalo zizimeleyo, okanye zihluka ukusuka kwilizwe ukuya kwilizwe, ukusuka kwisixeko ukuya kwisixeko.

Nangona kunjalo, iinjongo zeenjongo zobuhle kulo lonke uluntu, nangona kunjalo. Ayikho into yokuba kukho igama elithi "liyabonakala lihle." Enyanisweni, ngokuqhelekileyo kuncediswa ibinzana elithi "kwiklasi yonke" okanye "kwisixeko sonke". Okokuthi, indoda enhle ibonakala ihle ngokukhawuleza kubameli abaninzi bendawo abahlala kuyo. Kwaye abantu abathandekayo banandipha ukuthandwa ngabantu besini esahlukileyo. Kucacile ukuba kwimeko enjalo umbuzo wokuba ukubonakala kwamadoda kubalulekile ukuba amantombazana abe ngumbono ongokoqobo.

Nangona kunjalo kukho umahluko omkhulu phakathi kokubona indoda enhle kwaye ifuna ukuphosa umtshato naye. Njengoko kwavela, amadoda namabhinqa abazikhethela njengabalingani abanobuhle, banomlinganiselo wesimo esifanayo - banokuzithemba. Abafana kunye namantombazana abangenakho ukuzithemba, abanokuzithemba ngokuzithemba, ezinye izinto zilingana, ziya kukhetha umntu ongeyonto engabonakaliyo.

Ukuze uvelwano kulwalamano lube lukhulu ngakumbi, ubuhle bomntu akwanele ukuba amadoda okanye abafazi. Kwaba besetyhini ngokukodwa. Amadoda anokunyamezela umntu omhle kodwa ongenanto ongalandela. Kodwa abasetyhini baphula ngokukhawuleza ubudlelwane nabasetyhini abangenanto.

Emva kovuyo lokuqala lokuqala kobudlelwane, ixesha liza xa kuvela imvelaphi. Iminqweno eqhelekileyo, isimo sengqondo jikelele ngokubhekiselele kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo zobomi ziza phambili. Kubalulekile kweli nqanaba ngumxholo oqhelekileyo wengqondo yomntu. Oku akusiyo isigaba xa ungabonakalisa ubunzima beqabane, ukunganakwa okanye ukuxinezeleka. Ukumomotheka, ukuthinteka kunye nokufudumala koqhagamshelwano kwinqanaba lokutshintshwa kwintembeko ekuthandweni ngokubambisana kuya kuba ngumlinganiselo obalulekileyo wobudlelwane obuphumeleleyo. Kule nqanaba ukubonakala kwendoda kudla indima kwintombazana, nangona kungengundoqo. Ngoko akuyimfuneko ukususela kwiintsuku zokuqala zencwadana ukubonisa omnye nomnye kwindlu efanelekileyo kunye nezambatho ezilungeleyo, ngesimo esibi okanye esidakiwe.

Ezinye iingcali kwiintlalontle zentsapho zihlukanisa izigaba ezine zothando-uvelwano, ukukhanga okanye ukuthandwa, uthando, uthando. Ngokubanzi, ukubonakala komntu intombazana kubalulekile kuphela kwizigaba ezimbini zokuqala. Kwaye ke nabaninzi abathandi bemigodi emihle banokuziva bexhamle imvakalelo yabo kwintsapho yabo, nangona engabonakali kakuhle, kuba izigaba zokuqala zokugqithana sele zidlulile.

Ngaba kukho uphawu olukhethekileyo lobuntombi bentombazana, obaluleke ukuba ubuhle bomntu? Kucacile ukuba loo mfanekiso inzima ukuyiqonda. Njengoko sele kukhankanywe, intombazana kufuneka ibe nokuzithemba okukhulu. Olunye uphawu olubalulekileyo lunokuba ngumnqweno wokubonakala luhle ngakumbi kwabanye. Lo mnqweno ungabamabhinqa abaninzi. Iingcali zengqondo ziyazi ukuba intombazana eyingozi kunazo zonke ihamba nendoda enhle ibonakala njengendlovukazi yebhola. Abantu bakuqala ukumangaliswa ngokukhetha kwakhe, kwaye ke ucinge ukuba ekubeni uyayikhetha, ngoko kuyafaneleka. Ngoko ukukhetha indoda enhle njengeqabane liyinkunzi enkulu yentlalo kwintombi. Emva koko, ngoko yena ngokwakhe ubonakala kwabanye bekhangele ngakumbi.