Ukucacisa iingcinga eziphathelele umtshato

Umtshato uyimpawu emva kokuba abantu abaninzi babona ubumnyama bengaziwa. Uxhaswa ngamanga kunye neengcamango ezigxininisa kwiingqondo zethu. Yintoni eya kwenzeka emva kokuba umngxube wokubandakanya ungomnwe wakho? Yonke into iya kuhlala njengaphambili, okanye ngokuphambene nayo, yonke into iyahluka? Imibuzo enjalo ijikeleze wonke umntu oceba ukudala intsapho eyonwabileyo. Masihlukane nezinye iinkolelo kunye neengcamango ezisithintelayo ekuthintela umgca wedwa kunye nokuhlala ngokuqhelekileyo.


Inkolelo yenombolo 1. Emva komtshato, isondo siya kuba ngaphantsi.

Kwenene. Enyanisweni, akukho mfuneko yokukhathazeka ngocansi emva komtshato, kuba uphando lubonisile ukuba imibhangqwana ethandayo inokuba yathanda ngakumbi kunabantu abahlala kunye kunye. Ngaphezu koko, izibini ezizibophelele emtshatweni zinovuyo ngakumbi embhedeni kunezibini "ezikhululekile". Mhlawumbi oku kubangelwa kukuba abantu abatshatileyo, benza njalo ngenxa yothando kunye nokuqonda, kwaye abantu abaninzi bahlala ndawonye ngaphandle komkhwa, nge-inertia kwaye okwangoku baqwalasela abafaki bezicelo kubomi bombutho.

Inkolelo yenombolo 2. Ukuba uhlala ixesha elide ngaphambi komtshato, umtshato uya kuba namandla.

Kwenene. Ukuba sele usetyenzisiweyo ukuba iqabane lakho lilahla iisokisi ejikeleze indlu, oku akuthethi ukuba into eyona nto isele ikhona. Izifundo kwiYunivesithi yaseYale zibonise ukuba izibini ezahlala ndawonye ngaphambi kokuba umtshato wazo ziphule kabini, abo bangenzi . Xa abantu behlala kunye kunye, abafuni ukufunana, kwaye xa ufika umtshato, ungaqala ukucinga: "Ndatshata ngenxa yokuba ndihlala ndiphupha!" Abanye abaphathi beengqondo bathi akudingekile ukuba baphile kunye ngaphambi komtshato, kodwa ukulala ngesondo kwaye kuyimfuneko ...

Inkolelo yenombolo yesithathu. Ngomtshato, unakho ukulibala malunga nazo zonke izinto ezizonwabisa.

Kwenene. Abantu abaninzi bacinga ukuba emva komtshato umtshato uya kuba yindoda, kodwa akukho mntu ucinga ukuba yonke into incike kuthi! Ngokuqinisekileyo, endaweni yamaqela anomsindo uya kuhamba ngepaki kunye nomntwana, kodwa oku kukuvuyisa, ixesha elimnandi lobomi.

Inkolelo yenombolo yesine. Ukuba uphikisana naso sonke ixesha, ke ungasondeli.

Kwenene. Yonke into ephosakeleyo nakwezinye izinto, kubonisa ukuba unobungozi obuhle. Emva koko, ukuba ingxabano iphelile, kuyimfuneko ukuthetha nokuxoxa ngayo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, akuyimfuneko ukuxoxa ngento nganye ngesitya esingcolileyo. Kodwa imitshato eyoyolo kwaye iqinileyo isekelwe kwindlela yokuxolelanisa kunye nokugxeka. Esinye isazi senzululwazi saseBrithani sithi zonke iingxelo ezibucayi kufuneka zihlawulwe ngokunconywa kwi-1: 5. Ngokomzekelo, emva komnye "ongaqhelekanga", kufuneka kubekho "ubuhle" bobuhlanu, "bumnandi," "bathandekayo", njl njl. Isilinganiselo esilinganisiweyo sinciphisa i-1: 3, ngoko kufuneka uqikelele.

Inkolelo yenombolo yesi-5. Abantwana Bomeleze Umtshato

Kwenene. Ngaba ucinga ukuba ukukhala kwasebusuku kubantwana kunye noshintsho oluqhubekayo lwabafowuni luya kwenza umtshato wakho uqine? Awudingi ukulithemba. Ngelishwa, ngokubonakala kwintsapho kwintsapho, iinguqulelo zobudlelwane phakathi kwabatshatileyo zichazwe. Iingqabane ezininzi azikwazi ukunqoba le ngethuba lobomi babo bonke. Ukuba ulwalamano lwakho lukwinqanaba lokutshatyalaliswa, musa ukuxhomekeka kwinto yokuba umntwana angakwazi ukuzenza, unako kwaye unyanzelekile, unqunyulwe kude.

Inkolelo yenombolo 6. Umtshato awuqhelekanga.

Kwenene. Mhlawumbi, kuphela amadoda azimele afuna ukuba nawo. Emva koko, banesithembiso esinjalo - ukuqubha njengabesifazane abaninzi ngokunokwenzeka. Kodwa sinokuthi umfazi utshabalalisa iziko lomtshato, kuba emva komtshato, siqala ukuzimelela ngakumbi, ezizimeleyo kunye nezomnotho.

Inkolelo yenani le-7. Brakers zempilo.

Kwenene. Iphephancwadi laseBrithani lanyathelisa inqaku ekuthethwa ngalo ukuba i-bachelors abaneminyaka engaphezu kwama-40 bafa kabini ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngabayeni abatshatileyo. Izifundo zaseRashiya zibonisa into efanayo.

Izazi zenzululwazi zithi amadoda asetshatiweyo awanako ukuhlupheka ngenxa yokubanda, iintloko kunye nentlungu. Kodwa abanye abasebenzi baseYunivesithi yaseOslo bathi ukuba indoda inomfazi okhaliphile, ingozi yesifo senhliziyo iyancipha. Njani? Kungenxa yokuba uyamkhathalela kwaye uyayikhusela inkqubo yakhe yeentlanzi kuzo zonke iintlobo zengcinezelo.

Inkolelo yenani le-8. Ukuba uthando alulahlekanga, umtshato uya kuhlala ixesha elide.

Kwenene. Amadoda anakho ngonembeza ococekileyo udlula iimimosa. EBritani, uphando lubonise ukuba ubambiswano kunye nokuzibophelela emtshatweni kubaluleke ngaphezu kokubonakalisa iimvakalelo neentyatyambo.

Inkolelo yenani le-9. Ukuba kukho ukwahlukana, wena ngokwakho ubeka ityala.

Kwenene. Ukuba ufuna iintyatyambo kwintsimi ukuba ziqhame, kwaye izitya zifunyenwe ngaphezu kwexesha elilodwa, kufuneka uhlawule ngenxa yoko. Emtshatweni, yonke into iyafana. Izidingo zethu komnye nomnye zihlala ziguquka, kunye neemfuno. Kule minyaka unokuqonda ukuba abantu abahluke ngokupheleleyo. Kwaye uhlala phi kunye iminyaka emininzi?

Ngokuqhelekileyo, ukugxeka okulungileyo, kodwa ngokumodareyitha. Khumbula ukuba emtshatweni nomtshato, abantu ababini kufuneka bathathe inxaxheba. Ngoko bobabini banokusola imeko, bobabini bomtshato.

Inkolelo yenani le-10. Ngoku ngokuqhelekileyo yonke imitshato iphele ngokwahlukana.

Kwenene. Akunabo bonke, kodwa baninzi. Ngokomzekelo, ngo-2007, ii-686,000 iziqabane ezahlukanisa iRashiya, kodwa zatshatile kabini-zigidi ezi-1.3. Kakade, oku akunjalo, kodwa ngoku akukho ndlela enokuyenza kwaye iqinise umtshato ngokupheleleyo.

Inkolelo yenani le-11. Emtshatweni, abafazi baphila kakubi kunabesifazane.

Kwenene. Abasetyhini kunye namadoda, atshatileyo, abahlala bevuya ngakumbi kwaye bade kunabo bahlala bodwa beminyaka yobudala. Ngaphezu koko, abantu bentsapho, kungakhathaliseki ukuba besini, bafumana amaninzi kwaye banempilo engcono.

Inkolelo yenani le-12. Ungaphantsi kwakhe.

Kwenene. Enyanisweni, oku kunjalo. KwiYunivesithi yaseLondon, kwaqhutyelwa uphando olwenziwe ku-4500 amabhinqa namadoda, kwaye kwacaciswa ukuba abafazi, ngokwenene, bafumana uvuyo olungakumbi kumtshato kunamadoda. Isimo sengqondo somntu sizinzile xa siphila emtshatweni womtshato, kwaye kungengomtshato osemthethweni. Kubalulekile ukuba amadoda azivelele, nangona ukuba kunjalo akunjalo.

Iingcali ezininzi zeengqondo zithi ziza kubonisana kuphela amadoda ashade ngokusemthethweni kwaye akukho mntu uhlala emtshatweni womtshato. Kwaye kunjalo - abafazi beza nezikhalazo ukuba abahlobo babo abafuni ukutshata, kodwa abafazi abatshatileyo bancinci.

Inkolelo yenani le-13. Ukwakha intsapho, udinga isikhundla esinamandla sezimali.

Kwenene. Enyanisweni, yindoda kuphela kufuneka icinge ngayo, kodwa ingengomfazi. Ukufumana ukuzimela ngokwezimali, umsebenzi omhle kunye nezinye izinto eziyimpumelelo, udinga ixesha, kungekhona nje unyaka owodwa, ngoko ke ukuba umfazi eqala ukufezekisa oku, ngoko ke yena unika iminyaka yakhe engcono, ubuhle bentombi kunye nolutsha. Zonke izipho zendalo ezingcono kwi-career yakhe kunye noqeqesho, nangona kungenjalo into yokuba uya kufezekisa oko kuyifunayo. Ngenxa yoko, umfazi akakwazi ukufumana lula isiqingatha esifanelekileyo, kuba unxanelekile kwaye uhlambulukile.

Ukongezelela, kwiminyaka eminci imantombazana inomdla ngokugcweleyo kumthando kunye nobudlelwane, kwaye ukuba uthe wagqiba ekubeni angayi kwakha intsapho, uqala ukukrexeza nabantu abatsha abahlukeneyo.

Inkolelo yenani le-14. Ibhinqa elifundayo lijonge umyeni wakhe ixesha elide kwaye kunzima kuye ukuba atshate.

Kwenene. Mhlawumbi ngaphambili kwakunjalo, kodwa namhlanje umfazi ofundekileyo noqondayo, ngokuchaseneyo, unamathuba amaninzi okutshata, xa kuthelekiswa nala ma ntombazana 'anomoya' entloko, kungakhathaliseki ubudala.

Ngokuqinisekileyo, uCharles Hill, uprofesa waseMelika, uphando ngamabhangqa angama-200 ayesetshatile iminyaka engaphezu kwe-25, waza wafumana impumelelo yomtshato.

  1. Musa ukudala intsapho kwaye ungathandani kunye neqabane elincinane okanye elincinci ngaphezu kwakho.
  2. Yakha intsapho nomntu malunga nophuhliso lwabo lwengqondo kunye nobudala.
  3. Kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu - ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukuthanda uthando!

Musa ukuvumela iimbambano kunye neengcamango zonakalisa ubomi bakho, kuphela ucinga ukuba kuya kuba njani. Yitshata kwaye uphile ngokuzonwabisa!