Imvakalelo yokurhoxiswa kwi-personelf ibonakala xa umntu eqala ukuziva ukuba akafumani nantoni na, kwaye akakwazi ukuyitshintsha. Kwakhona, lo mvakalelo unokuvela xa umntu kwezinye iimeko enza into engafanelekanga, kodwa engazi isinqumo esifanelekileyo. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, umntu akacaphuki naye, nangona engayiqondi isizathu sokunganeliseki kwakhe.
Ukuba umntu unenjongo yokuziqonda, sele esele wenza isinyathelo sokutshintsha isimo sakhe sengqondo kuye. Kodwa kufuneka uziqonde kakuhle. Udla ngokuzibetha njani? Bafunda uncwadi olukhethekileyo, bafuna uhlobo lwabo. Zonke ezi zenzo kufuneka zithathwe njengenkqubo yendalo ebomini bomntu, umzekelo, ukutya okanye ukuphefumla. Umntu kufuneka azibekelele kuphela iinjongo zangempela kwaye kungekhona iinjongo zehlabathi. Emva koko, emva kokufezekisa injongo enye, enye iyavela, efuna ukufezekisa. Ubomi bomntu kufuneka bukhululekile kwaye buzolile. Zonke iinkqubo kufuneka zijoliswe ekufumaneni ukwaneliseka kwinkqubo yobomi. Kodwa abantu abaxhomekeke ekupheleleni, bahlala behlushwa ngokweenjongo ezingafumanekiyo, kunye nokuphunyezwa kwazo okufanelekileyo. Baye banqwenela ukungaboni ubuso emdakeni. Abantu abanjalo kufuneka baphelele, baya kwenza iimfuno ezifanayo kwabanye.
Nangona, ukuba ukhangelelene, akukho nto efanelekileyo kwihlabathi. Abantu abalungileyo beza kunye nabo. Ngoko uqala ukuxabana. Abanye, ukuze baphumelele, benze konke okusemandleni kwaye kungenakwenzeka, bathuthumele, bathuthumele baze bazibize zonke iintlobo zamagama. Xa umntu eqonda ukuba akafezekanga, ufika kwisigqibo sokuba akanakukuthanda nokuzithatha. Ngokuqhelekileyo kunokuba abantu abanjalo bazenzele into yokuba uthando luya kufezeka. Abaqondi ukuba ukuzithandana akuyongezi kuyo nayiphi na impawu ezintle. Uthando ngokwakho lunokuthelekiswa nothando lomama kumntwana wakhe. Umama uyamthanda umntwana kungekhona into ethile, kodwa ngenxa yokuba unayo. Kule meko, akufanele kubaluleke ukuba ungubani, ubunjani obunzima, indlela obukeka ngayo okanye uphumelele njani kulobu bomi.
Akunandaba nokuba umntu unomlingani. Ukuba umntu uzimisela iinjongo ezifanelekileyo kwaye akahlali enganelisekanga naye, oku akuyi kunceda aphelele. Ukongezelela, ayimphakamisi emehlweni abo kunye nakwamehlo akhe. Ukufezekisa into, kufuneka uphulaphule ngokunyanisekileyo iminqweno yakho kunye nenyaniso. Musa ukuziphepha. Uthando, uyakwamkela ngokupheleleyo. Kodwa kuqala umntu kufuneka aqonde oko akufunayo. Kumelwe athembele yena nabanye. Kananjalo, umntu unokuzithemba njani yena nabanye xa engenalo uthando?
Nangona kunjalo, bambalwa abantu abazithandayo. Kodwa ukuba oko kwenzeka, umntu ufuna ngokukhawuleza ugqirha. Ngenxa yoko, uxinzelelo olubi. Kule meko, iinkonzo zeengcali zengqondo aziyi kumnceda. Ngenxa yokuba ukudandatheka kudla ukuphathwa ngokudibanisa amayeza kunye neengqondo zengqondo. Yintoni elala phantsi kwegama elithi "Andiyithandi"? Oku, okokuqala, ucingo olubhekiswe kwabanye abantu abakufutshane nabantu. Le ndoda icinga ukuba iyakuthanda kakhulu kuye abantu ngokuthandana nokuthanda.
Ngendlela, abaninzi abafazi bavakalisa amagama anjengokuthi "bathande baze bamkele" okanye "baqonde." La magama amabhinqa asebenzisa ukufikelela amathuba okubanceda bafumane uvuyo ngakumbi ebomini. Nangona amandla amabhinqa kukuba ayikayi ukubonisa ubuthathaka bawo. Ukuba akanakukhathazeka, ngokuqinisekileyo uya kuzama ukutshintsha into ebomini bakhe, kunye nelizwe lakhe ngendlela efanelekileyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, kakhulu kule nkqubo kuxhomekeke kumntu. Kodwa abasetyhini banokukhawuleza kunamadoda ukuba baqonde ubuthathaka babo, kwaye basombulule zonke iingxaki ukuze bafezekise injongo yabo. Yiyo le mpawu ayenziwa ngumfazi, kwaye uyomeleza. Kufuneka uthande kwaye uzamkele ngokwakho ngokulwa nawe, kodwa ngokufumana kuphela kwizibonelelo zakho kunye namandla akho. Ezi zixhobo kunye nokunceda ukufezekisa umntu ukufezekisa injongo yabo, ukuba bayamkele, baqonde kwaye baziqonde ngokwabo.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba isizathu esona sizathu sokungaphumeleli, ukungquzulana kunye nesimo esifanelekileyo sithandwa ngumntu. Eli gama libonakaliswa ngeendlela ezininzi, umzekelo, ukuzitshitshisa kunye nomzimba wakho, ukuzithelekisa nabanye, ukunganeliseki ngesimo somntu, njl. Umntu udla ngokuzibetha yena nabanye, kwaye oku akunakwenziwa. Ngenxa yokuba isimo sengqondo nesimo sangaphakathi somntu asibonakali ngokubonakala kwakhe. Ukongezelela, ekubeni unesimo esibi kunye nesimo esifanelekileyo, unokutsala kuphela okubi. Loo mntu uya kubhalwa kuphela ngabantu abanjalo. Ixesha lokuvula iqela lezifundo ezinganelisekanga.
Kuye kwagqitywa ixesha elide ukuba ukuba umntu uhlala edumisa, uzithumela iingcinga ezilungileyo. Ubomi bakhe, ubuninzi buqala ukutshintsha, kwaye kube ngcono. Kwakhona, izazi zeengqondo zincoma ukuqeqeshwa okukhethekileyo. Olu luhlu lwezifundo ezibizwa ngokungaqhelekanga ngokuthi "Amazwi ahloniphekileyo kuwe," Ukudumisa amagama kwabanye "kunye" Ukudumisa kwabanye. " Ukongezelela, kuya kubakho ukuhlalutya uze usombulule imeko engafanelekanga. Ngenxa yoko, kukho uhambo oluthile lwengqondo oluthiwa "Ukuguqulwa kwezithombe", eziqulethwe ngamanqanaba alandelayo: inkcazo yengxaki, ukudala umfanekiso, ukuguqulwa komfanekiso kunye nokuqinisekiswa kweziphumo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuqeqeshwa okunjalo kufuneka kwenziwe ngooncedo lweengcali. I-psychotherapist eneengxaki iza kunceda ekuboneni ingxaki kunye nokusebenza ngokufanelekileyo.
Kukho nenani leemimiselo eziqhelekileyo, umzekelo, ukuba ube nomnene, ukuphumla rhoqo. Kufuneka sizinakekele, sigcine ulawulo oluchanekileyo losuku kunye nesondlo. Sebenzisa nayiphi na inkqubo yokufumana amandla amandla. Kakade, yonke imihla ukuhamba okanye ukugijima emoyeni omtsha ukususela kumzuzu engama-30 ukuya kwiyure enye.