Uninzi lwabantu luhlelwe ngendlela efanayo - bayakuthanda kwaye banako ukuchazela phantse yonke into. Nasiphi na isiganeko, nayiphi na ingxaki inokuthi "ibeke kwiithalafu." Kukho iinkcazo ezimbalwa ezinjalo kwihlabathi labantu. Kulula ukubona ukuba, ngokuphendula ibali lakho okanye isikhalazo, u-interlocutor uthi: "kungenxa yokuba ..." okanye: "Ndakuxwayisa ..." kwaye, nangona iinkcazo kaninzi zinganiki ithuba lokubikezela ikusasa, abantu bayababamba, njengendlela yokuphila. Omnye wale mijikelezo uthi "ingxaki yexesha eliphakathi". Kwaye, ngokusondela kwiminyaka engama-40, ngokukhawuleza kubonakala ngathi balahlekelwa izakhono zabo zokubhukuda kwaye bafuna le nkxaso. Yiyo ingxaki yeminyaka engama-40 ichaza "intsimbi yegrey" eyaziwayo, kwaye emva kwexesha elivuyayo - "kwi-45 baba berry kwakhona." Okanye kungekhona i-berry - ukuba awuzange uhlangabezane neengxaki. Yintoni eyenzekayo kweli xesha? Kwaye ngokubanzi: ingxaki ebomgangatho wobomi - inkolelo okanye inyaniso? Kwaye kwenzeka ntoni na ubomi bentsapho? Ngale nto uze uthethe.
UAnatoly wayehlala nomkakhe iminyaka engama-24. Yonke into, yayitsho, yayinjengomntu wonke-yasebenza nzima, yazama, yazala abantwana - unyana nentombi. Abantwana bakhula, unyana waphumelela kwiziko kwaye washiya, intombi yakhe kwafuneka ifunde iminyaka emi-2, kodwa u-Anatoly akamboni kumbona: abahlobo - abahlobo-umsebenzi kunye neyakhe indlu. Umfazi wam ulapha. UAnatoly uyabubula kakhulu - owesifazane omhle, onobuqili, onomdla. Uyenze umsebenzi njengomphathi ophezulu, kwaye akaze afike ekhaya. Ngaphambili, xa abantwana bebancinci, kwakungabonakali kakhulu. Kodwa abantwana bekhulile, u-Anatoly akazange abe nomsebenzi kwiminyaka yamuva. Wafika ekhaya, kodwa umfazi wakhe okanye engekafiki, okanye wayesele elele. Yaye ukuba badibana ekhitshini, ke nje ngoomelwane kwindlu yokuhlala. Umfazi ophethe i-handset waqhubeka nokunika "abasebenzi", batya ngokukhawuleza baze babalekela kwikhompyutha. Ngendlela, zombini iikhompyuthele kunye nomabonwakude kumntu ngamnye womtshato wabakho. Bona, ngokucacileyo, babeya kuhlala iminyaka eminye. Kodwa ngandlela-thile u-Anatoly wagula ngentsholongwane. Umfazi wakhe wenkomfa kwelinye idolophu, kwaye esuka apho washiya ukujonga umntu, okanye ukwabelana naye ngamava akhe. Intombi yam nayo yashiya-ikhefu. UAnatoly wabiza ugqirha wesithili. Bathetha. Eli bhinqa labuza uAnatoly malunga neempawu, amayeza anqunyiwe, kodwa emva kokufunda ukuba akukho mntu uhlala ekhaya kwaye akukho mntu unokunyamekela umntu onokushisa kwe-39.7, wathi: "Ndiza kuphelisa yonke imingeni kwaye ndibuyele." Kwiiyure ezimbalwa kamva wazisa amayeza neziqhamo. Ngoko badibana. UVlad - ngoko igama lakhe lalingeneminyaka elincinane kune-Anatoly iminyaka eyi-10. Wayengenalo intsapho. Isiko asizange sisebenze, ngoko ke ukusasazwa, kodwa phi uphando lwephondo lingafumana umyeni wakhe? Wabuyela ekhaya, waya kwikomkhulu, waza wachitha ixesha lakhe ukusebenza.
Xa u-Anatoly waphinda, wagqiba ekubeni abulele ugqirha. Ndafunda ishedyuli yomsebenzi, ndithenga iintyatyambo, waza wandiyisa ekhaya. Kwaye kungalindelekanga, yena ngokwakhe, emva kokuya kwendebe yetiyi, wahlala kwada kwada kwada phakathi kwebusuku. UVlad wayengumnxibelelwano onobulumko, onomdla kunye nokuqonda. U-Anatoly wabelana ngeengxaki ezininzi - waza waya ekhaya ngokucinga. Ekhaya akukho mntu walindela. Umfazi wam wayelele. Ngomso wambulisa, kodwa wayekhwelisa intloko yakhe: iifowuni zaqhekeka. Kwaye kwangokuhlwa u-Anatoly waphinda waya kuVlad. Kwaye emva kweenyanga ezimbini waqonda oko wayehlala efuna kwaye wayengenayo ebomini bakhe-ithuba lokuthetha, ukubonisana, ukunyamekela kunye nokwabelana ngokuphendula.
Amaninzi azama ukuthetha nomfazi wakhe, kodwa waphendula umyalezo weselula: "Isixhobo sogqirha siphelile okanye siphumelele kwi-network cover". Kwaye ke ... Emva koko wavuma kuVlad ngothando waza wathi xa etshatile, kodwa wayekulungele ukulinda. Wabuyela kuye.
... Umfazi wam kwiveki kamva wambona ukuba u-Anatoly akayi kuchitha ubusuku ekhaya. Ekuqaleni, wayekhathazekile malunga nokwahlukana kwepropati, kodwa akaqhawuli umtshato. Nangona kunjalo, emva kokuba i-Anatoly ifake isicelo kwinkundla, umfazi wayeguqula ngokuziphatha kwakhe. Waqala ukubiza, wahlangana nomyeni wakhe emsebenzini, weza kuye ngexesha lesidlo sasemini. Simele sizinikele ngetyala-ziziphatha kakuhle kwaye zazama ukuchazela u-Anatoly ukungabi namalungelo okuqhawula umtshato emacaleni omabini. Kwakubonakala ngathi kwakungekho umntu, kodwa i-robot. Kwaye xa ndithe ndaqonda ukungahambisani nento eyenzekayo, yaphuka. Wakhala, kwaye uAnatoly wambona kuloo ntombazana, owathi wathandana, ulungile kwaye uyaphila. Kodwa ndaqonda ukuba kwakukho ububele obushiyweyo-kum, kuye, kwinto yokuba ababaziyo.
Wafika ekubonisaneni kunye neengqondo zeengqondo ngenxa yecala, iveki ngaphambi kokuqhawula umtshato. Eqonda ukuba yonke into isele iqunyiwe, u-Anatoly wazama ukuhlalutya: kwenzeka ntoni kulwalamano, kutheni bengenako ukuyibeka phambi kokuba yonke into ishushu? Xa umfazi wamkhuza wathi: "Ndizama ngenxa yethu sonke," waqonda ukuba ulungile. Kodwa ukuba le migudu yayingeke idibaniswe yiyo yonke into ebudlelwaneni, ukuba umsebenzi awuzange uyigqithele kumda - mhlawumbi wayibona ukuba umyeni wakhe, ofuna yena ... "Ndiyazi," watsho. ekupheleni kwentlanganiso, i-Anatoly, yinkxalabo yonke ebomini yobomi "...
Ngoko, le ngxaki leyo wonke umntu uyazi. Iingcali zengqondo zichaza imida yazo ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo-ukusuka kwi-37 ukuya kwi-45 iminyaka. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ngubani owaziyo xa eli liphakathi? Asinikelwa ukuba siqikelele ... Nangona kunjalo, ngokwemvakalelo yokuzimela kwabantu ngexesha elithile, bajongene namava ukuba isigamu sobomi sidlulile. Kufana nokunyuka kwexesha elide ukuya phezulu, uhambo lwendiza, lwamathuba akhe angenamkhawulo, olulandelwe ukuqala kokungenakugwema kwehla. Umphezulu uphelile. Akukho mntu unokuhlala apho ngonaphakade. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kunesimo esicacileyo samandla, amandla, umsebenzi. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kuyaqondwa ukuba kwakhona le ngqungquthela ayikwazi ukuphakanyiswa: imikhosi ayifanayo ... Yaye abantu bayinyamezela ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo ...
Sinobunzima ekulahlekelweni kwamandla omzimba kunye nomtsalane. Kodwa kunzima nakakhulu ukusinda ukuhlukana ngamaphupha kunye neengcinga. Kulo xesha kuqondwa oko u-Yuri Loza echaze kwingoma yakhe edabukisayo neyongxondorha: "Sekudlulile kum, sele ndingenawo amaninzi ... kwaye kwiinkwenkwezi ezimangalisayo andizange ndize ndize ndizenzeke. Ndakwazi ukudinwa ngabantu abaninzi. Ndingcono ndedwa. Kulula kwaye kulula ukuphupha ... "Kule minyaka umntu uhlangabezane nokungafani phakathi kwamaphupha kunye nenyaniso. Kwaye uyavuma ukuba akunakwenzeka ukufezekisa kwaye ubeka ingcamango kwizinto ezifudumalayo, ezifudumele, ezivuyisayo, okanye ezenzela ukuvavanya inyaniso kwaye iyaqhubeka iphila ngendlela efanayo, ingacingi ukuba yena ngokwakhe utshintshile, kwaye ihlabathi alinakuma ...
Ngokuqhelekileyo, inkathazo ebomini yobomi iqhubeka kunye nokwandiswa kwamava angaphakathi, ukuxhalaba okukhulayo okunxulumene nekamva. Abanye banako ukuqonda ezi nkqubo kunye nombane wamandla kwisitya esakhayo. Abanye abaziqondi kwaye bacinga ukuba iingxaki azikho kunye nabo, kodwa kunye nemeko. Nguye oneminyaka engama-40 eqala ukuvuselela ubomi bawo ngokutsha kwaye atshintshe yonke into - umsebenzi, abahlobo, intsapho . Kwaye kukho ukukholelwa ukuba uhlangabezana noKuvuselela, intsha yesibini ...
UMarina, eneminyaka engama-39, ngokukhawuleza waqala ukuziva enganelisekiyo kunye nolwalamano lwentsapho. "Ufuna ntoni na?" - abahlobo badidekile. Enyanisweni, indoda inenkathalo, ilumkele, ithandekayo. Konke kuhle, ukuba kungekhona "kodwa". UMarina wayesoloko esenomncinci, kwaye ngoku wayefuna imali emininzi, imoto entsha, iimpahla ezibiza ... kwaye umyeni wakhe ngumlingisi oqhelekileyo, othobekileyo kunye ne-balding. Ekhangela, uMarina wacinga - ingubani yena umlingana naye? Kwaye ngelinye ilanga wagqiba ... Watshatyalaliswa ngokukhawuleza umyeni wakhe engazange aqonde nantoni na, washiya intombi endala kunye naye, waqala ukusasaza iziqholo, wenza umsebenzi waza wathola indoda entsha. Xa eneminyaka engama-42, waba ngumama kwakhona. Kwaye, xa unyana wam unyaka, ndaqonda ukuba "ibhetri ihleli phantsi." Umntwana wayengenwabileyo, omncinci - iminyaka engama-7 emncinci - umyeni wakhe wacasulwa ... uMarina weza kwi-psychologist ukuqonda ubomi bakhe. Wazama kwakhona ukuphonsa amatye, engaqapheli ukuba kwakuyixesha lokubaqokelela. Kwaye no-psychologist wayebukeka enesihawu kulo mfazi okhangayo ochitha amandla amaninzi namandla azama ukukhangeleka omncinane, onwabileyo kwaye uphumelele kwaye ngexesha elifanayo ukhangele iimpendulo kwimbuzo engapheliyo: "Ndingubani na? Umama? Umfazi oshishino ophumelelayo? Umfazi womntu okhangayo? Kanti na? "UMarina onokukhumbula ukhumbula ubomi nomyeni wakhe wokuqala, elula kwaye ecacileyo kwaye ngoku ayifumaneki. Ucinga ngexhala lokuba yonke into imele iyenze yenziwe ngumntwana, izifo zobuntwana, isikolo ... Yaye impilo iyaqala ukungaphumeleli - yakutshanje kwaye yahluleka ukubuyela ...
Umgangatho wobomi lixesha apho abantwana sele bekhulile, xa ubomi buncinane okanye buchanekile kwaye ucinga ngazo. Mayelana nempilo, umsebenzi, ukuba kwisicwangciso esibalulekileyo sisenako ukuyiqonda, kunye nento yokuthetha. Ngamanye amaxesha ukuqonda phakathi kobomi kuyithuba lokwenene lokubalekela ubudlelwane obuyingozi obusekelwe kwixesha elidala nelingenanto. Ngenxa yokuba kulo nyaka ubulili buba luleke ngakumbi kunokuba "uluntu," luqinisekisa ubungundoqo bendoda phezu kwezinto eziphilayo.
U-Andrew wathatha u-Liza xa eneminyaka eyi-16, kwaye wayeneminyaka engama-18. Hayi, uthando kunye nokukhulelwa okulandelayo kukaLisa. Intombi yazalwa. Umncinci unzima ukwakha ubudlelwane, kwaye ukuba kwakungengomama kaLisa, owamnceda intombi yakhe aze amncedise ekhaya, bebengayi kuhlala ndawonye ixesha elide. Intombi yabo yatshata xa u-Andrei wayeneminyaka engama-38. Kwaye waqonda ukuba uLisa wayengumfazi ohluke ngokupheleleyo. Kwaye iminyaka engama-20 yobomi babo, ubudlelwane buqhutywe kwimpikiswano, ukuxolelana, isondo, ukuxabana okulandelayo ... kwaye abananto into yokuthetha ngayo. ULiza unomdla kwimiboniso yeTV kunye namantombazana. Yena-iincwadi kunye neefilimu ezinzulu. U-Andrei washiya uLisa, kodwa kungekhona omnye umfazi. Wathi: "Ndiya kwigumbi lam."
Kwaye kunjalo. Kulo xesha, kubaluleke kunanini na ukuzitholela, ukufumanisa, ukufunda indlela yokumazi umntu ongekho kwiintlanganiso, uqaphela ukuba lo ngumhlobo omdala. Ukuphishekela, umxhelo wesiqingatha sokuqala sobomi sele sele uvelise iziqhamo. Ngoku kubalulekile ukulondoloza isivuno. Abanye basenalo ixesha lokuhlwayela intsiba okwesihlandlo sesibini, abanye bazingathathi ingozi. Kodwa wonke umntu uqala ukufumana amathuba amatsha. Oko kubonakala ngathi ukulahleka - ukukhula kwabantwana, ukunciphisa umsebenzi, ukwandisa inzala kwihlabathi langaphakathi elichasene nomsebenzi wentlalo-ibe yinto ebonakalayo ebalulekileyo. Sifumana ukukhula kunye nobulumko, sifunda ukuxolela abantu abasondeleyo kunye nokwahlukana nobudlelwane kunye nabo abangafuni ukuchitha ixesha.
Ingqondo ephucukileyo yesikhathi esitshintshileyo esibonisa ukuba udlulile kule ngxaki. Kwimbali ethi "I-Pony yam encinane," uStephen King uchaza indlela yokuguga njengesiva sokukhawulezisa ixesha. Ukululaza ngokukhawuleza, izifundo ezingapheliyo esikolweni zibonakalisa ukuqala kobomi, ukuzaliseka kwexesha elihle-iminyaka yobutsha, xa siphila ngokuvisisana nenyaniso. Kodwa ngaphaya komnye umntu uhleka phezu kwethu kwaye ukhawuleza izandla zamehlo ethu, kwaye ixesha libaleka, kwaye lincinci ...
Kwaye, mhlawumbi, bonke abo bantu ngoku ba phezulu okanye baqala ukuzala kwabo, baya kukwazi ukuyeka baze bacinge ngowabo, ngokuphathelele ubomi babo, malunga nabathandekayo babo ... Futhi, ngaphandle kokulibala, kusasa baya kuhlala namhlanje, ngoku. Ukuthanda, ukuhlupheka, ukwenza oko uphuphayo, ukuphikisana nokubeka, ukuzala nokukhulisa abantwana, ubhale imifanekiso nomculo, funda ukuqhuba ... Ngenxa yokuba ukungenzi, abazama ukukulinganisa ngokulinda, ixesha libiwe ebomini. Lobu bomi bufutshane, bufutshane.