Kufuneka uthathele ukuba ungubani. Kulula ukuthetha! Nendlela yokuphumeza oku?
Indlela yokuwa ngokuthandana nawe, ngaba oku xa imilenze yakho imfutshane kwaye impumlo yakho inkulu kakhulu? Uya nini kumagosa amathathu okweshumi iminyaka, kwaye ingqungquthela yahlanganiswa nothuli oludala? Xa unyana ezisa enye inqumla, kwaye intombi egadile egadi?
Ngelishwa, ininzi yethu yakhulela inkolelo yokuba uthando ngokwabo lubi, lungalunganga, alufanelekanga. Simele sicinge ngabanye kuqala, kwaye ngoko malunga nathi. Abaninzi bahlala njenga ...
Ngaba uye wakha wazibuza ukuba yiyiphi into esekelwe emva kwegama elithi "ukungabi nantoni": umnqweno onyanisekileyo wokunceda umntu engacingi ngentshisekelo yakho, okanye ingumzamo wokuba ubalekele ngaphandle kwakho? Into enye kulula ukuhlukanisa: kwimeko yokuqala, umntu uyavumelana kwaye uyavuya. Okwesibini, ugozwe ngonaphakade, ecatshukiswa, ecatshulwa yihlabathi lonke, "ongayithandiyo" kwaye "akayiqondi." Kwimeko nayiphi na into, umntu ukholelwa ukuba "wabanika amandla onke nolutsha," kwaye abanambulelo! "
Yaye uziqonde ngokwakho - ixesha elide kwaye, ngokuthe ngqo, uyatshiswa. Ngokukhawuleza uya kufumana into engabonakaliyo! Ngoko kufuneka "uziphosele" kwimvelaphi, uze wakhe phezu kweenyawo zabanye ... Awuyithandi? Emva koko ufunde ukuzithobela yonke into ebunzulu, uyeke ukufihla emva kobomi obungunaphakade "ewe ndingathanda, kodwa ..." kwaye wenze ubuncinane isinyathelo sokuqala.
Ukungathandeki kwethu kuthi kunamalungu amabini-angaphandle nangaphakathi. Iyokuqala ibonakaliswa ngokukhawuleza koluntu ngokwamalungelo, iimpumelelo kunye nezakhono. "Ucinga ukuba ndilungile, kodwa ndiyazi ukuba akunjalo." Kwaye akumangalisi ukuba ngexesha lexesha abanye baqala ukuvumelana nale nto!
Iinkalo eziqhelekileyo zezinto ezingabathandiyo besifazane ...
- Ukungabikho kwamanconywa ("Oo, ukuba, andiyiqondi into, ndiyicinga").
- ukunikezelwa kwabanye abantu ngokufanelekileyo, okwenene, kodwa ilungelo lakho lingewe ("Ngaphandle kwayo, andiyi kulawula ebomini").
- umkhwa wokungathengi into ethile ngokwakho, ukholelwa ukuba kungcono ukuthenga le nto kwenye ("Kubiza kakhulu kum, ndiya kukwenza").
- umnqweno wokuzithethelela oko ukhangeleyo ("Le ngubo igqithise ...").
- imvume yokuzibiza ngokugqithiseleyo amagama amancinci, kodwa ngokwenene ihlazo lamagama ("hrynya", "isidenge", "donut").
Landela. Ukuba uziphatha ngendlela efanayo, utshintshe isimo sakho sengqondo nokuphendula. Ukungathandeki kwangaphakathi kusekelwe kukuqhathaniswa ngonaphakade nabanye, "okulungileyo." Ungajongi kummelwane (intombi, umlingane), kodwa kuwe, kodwa kwinqanaba elidlulileyo: unyaka odlulileyo ndaqala ukufunda ulwimi, kwaye ngoku ndithetha ngokucokisekileyo; yayisekela - yaba yinkosi. Oku kuya kukuvumela ukuba uhlolisise iimpumelelo zakho kwaye uzive uziqhenye. Funda ukuhlula ngokwakho uqobo, uqobo lwabanye ukusuka ekuhlolweni nasekubonweni kwempumelelo yakho ngabanye abantu. Ezi zinto zihluke ngokupheleleyo. Umyeni wakho ushiye wena, ulahlekelwe ngumsebenzi wakho, wehlule iphrojekthi - konke oku akukwenzi ukuba ube ngumntu obi kakhulu. Ngamnye wethu uhlukile - esi sizathu esibalulekileyo sokuzithandayo. Ukuba uzalwe, kuthetha ukuba nguwe, onjengawe, ofuna le hlabathi. Khumbuza ngokwakho ngokuphindaphindiweyo - kwaye yonke into iya kuhamba kakuhle.
Ukuze uzithande, kufuneka ufunde. Ingakanani ebomini esenzayo "kwinkampani", "kungeyikucasula". Cinga ngezinto ozithandayo: luhlobo luni lomculo olumnandi, yiziphi iincwadi ezinomdla, ziziphi iimpahla ozikhethayo, ziphi na izinto ezikufanelayo, kunye nento ofuna ukuyitshintsha?
Musa ukugqithisa imibuzo "engunaphakade". Uphupha ntoni, uxabisa ntoni, uzimisele ntoni, yintoni oyenzile? Impendulo ethembekileyo iya kukuvumela ukuba uqonde apho uhamba khona-kwiinjongo zakho okanye kuzo. Khumbula: lowo ozithandayo, indlela inokuthi, iyashukumisa, kodwa ihlala iqhuba.