Ngokuqhelekileyo kukho iindlela ezintathu: hlalisa nabazali okanye izalamane, uthathe izindlu ngetyala, okanye urente indlu. Ekubeni iinyanga zokuqala zobomi bentsapho azifaneli zihluke kwiimeko ezintle zemali, kwaye ukuqeshisa indlu ayiyi kuphuma, kwaye akufanelekile ukuthetha ngomboleko, kufuneka ntoni intsapho encinci? Kwaye kukho kuphela ukhetho lokuqala.
Kwaye ukuxhaphaza abanye bazali, abatsha abasanda kutshata badlulisela ngempumelelo izinto kwiindawo ezihlala kuzo. Kwaye kulo mzekelo, ukuba omnye wabafazi abatshatileyo benziwa kuphela yinyaniso yomtshato, ngoko okwesibini kuqala inkqubo enzima yokwenza izinto ezinxulumene nobomi bentsapho kunye nobomi nabanye abazali. Olu khetho aluhlali luphumelele, kwaye iintsapho ezimbini, ukuqala nokuqhubeka, kunzima ukudibanisa, kodwa kukho iimeko ezikhethekileyo. Kukho nawuphi na, zombini izinto ezintle nezimbi zifumaneka kwintsebenziswano. Ngoko makhe siwaqwalasele.
Ixesha elihle.
Umzuzu wokuqala wokufumana abantu abasandula kutshata bangaba ngumzekelo wabazali. Ngokukodwa ukuba baphila ubomi obude ngoxolo noxolo. Oku kukhangeleka kakhulu kufundisa isibini esincinane sesiseko sobudlelwane kunye nokusombulula ingxabano. Okwesibini, kwaye ingeyona nto ebalulekileyo, yinto eyimali. Ekubeni amaxesha amaninzi, abazali bathatha ngobubele ubuninzi beendleko zendlu ngenxa yobubele babo, obugcina imali kubantu abatsha. Into eyona nto kukuba bayayixabisa lo mqondiso ngesithunzi, kwaye uzama ukuqokelela imali ethile yokuthenga okumangalisayo, umzekelo, ngokwabo izindlu, imoto, iholide okanye ininzi yentlawulo yokuboleka imali. Okwesithathu, kwaye mhlawumbi iyona nto ibalulekileyo, kodwa ngexesha elifanayo, umbandela ongeyinto yokuncedana. Efanelekileyo, le nto ingabizwa, ngenxa yokuba kunokwenzeka ukunciphisa umthwalo owenziwe yinkxalabo yekhaya kokunye nakwezinye iintsapho. Oku kunceda kakhulu umthwalo womsebenzi omama omncinane ukuba umntwana uvela kwintsapho. Ugogo nomkhulu bahlala bexhamla kule nkxwaleko, xa umama osandul 'ukuzalwa engakwazi ukuphumla encinane aze aphinde aphe amandla. Ngokufanayo, kuxhomekeke ekuzalweni komntwana, kwakhona ubuyela kwimpembelelo emihle yecandelo lemali. Inqaku elibi lokuncedana ngokubambisana lunokuthiwa, kuba uncedo aluhlali lusezantsi kwinqanaba elifunekayo, okanye alisoloko lifanelekileyo. Ngokuphindaphindiweyo, abazali banokudibanisa umxholo othi "uncedo" kunye "nokunyamekela." Ukuqhelana nokukhathalela umntwana wabo, abazali bathatha ngaphantsi kwephiko kunye nesiqingatha, ngaloo ndlela banciphisa inkululeko kunye nokuzimela kwesi sibini. Kulungile ukuba ekuqaleni kobomi bentsapho abantu abaselula bahlala benomnye umntu onokubonisana naye, kwaye uthetha nje ngeengxaki, kodwa abazali bafanele bakhumbule ukuba kungakhathaliseki ukuba ukhathazekile kangakanani ngabantwana bakho, kubomi babo, kwaye ungaphazamisi ngelixa awuyi kucelwa ukuba wenze njalo.
Ixesha elibi.
Njengoko bethetha, kukho iindawo eziselilanga, kwaye nakwiintsapho ezifanelekileyo kakhulu, kukho nantoni na into yokukhalaza ngayo. Ingakumbi ukuba kukho iintsapho ezimbini. Ngoko ke makhe siqale ukuqwalasela ezinye iinkalo ezimbi zokuhlalisana.
Okokuqala, le meko yimiba icinezelekile kwiintlobo zombini, ngakumbi ukuba ngaba abazali babengazange bambone esinye isiqingatha somntwana ngaphambi komtshato, kwaye kukho ukuba kungenzeka ukuba ubudlelwane abuyi kusebenza. Ngokukodwa abazali bafuna ixesha lokuba bafundele indima entsha, kwaye sele benesimo sengane yomntwana wabo, kunye neentsapho ezincinci zisetyenzisane, kwaye ngexesha elifanayo bafunde ukuhlala nabazali babo. Ngokubanzi, ngokufutshane, indlu eyahlukileyo iya kwahlula ingxaki kwisiqingatha. Njengoko kukhankanywe ngasentla, kukho ukuxhomekeka kwezemali kwesibini esitshatileyo kubazali babo. Isenzo esifanelekileyo, kunye neenjongo ezilungileyo zabazali, zikhupha isimo sengqondo sokungabi nantoni kwimali yabantwana, kwaye kamva isiqalo sokuqulunqwa kohlahlo lwabiwo lwezentsapho. Iphulo elicacileyo liya kuba ngaba abazali bahlala kwimpikiswano ehlalayo phakathi kwabo, kwaye abafaki ngokukhawuleza kubo nakwabanye. Emva koko unamava okuqala okuhlala ndawonye akunakubizwa ngokuba yimpumelelo. Olunye "i-rake" apho bobabini abasanda kutshata kunye nabazali babo basemngciphekweni wokuhamba, oku kukungaqondani, kunye neengxaki zeminyaka yooyise nabantwana. Ngokuqhelekileyo yonke into iqala ukusuka kumaxesha, "kodwa sisesikhathi sethu", kwaye iphelela ngeenkcukacha ezinde kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ihlazo.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, kukho ezinye iindawo ezintle nezingalunganga, kodwa ziya kuxhomekeka kwiimpawu zabantu, ukuqonda kwabo kunye nokukwazi ukungena kwiimeko. Emva kwakho konke, yintoni intsapho encinane ifanele iyenze ukuba kungekho ndawo yokuhlala, njani ukuba ungathembeli kwinkxaso yabazali? Kwaye abazali banokukhumbula amanyathelo abo okuqala, ngakumbi ukuba baqala kwakhona. Emva koko ukuqonda ukuba intsapho encinci, ukuba akukho ndawo yokuhlala, akunakulungele ukuyenza, yenza umsebenzi wayo.
Ukuba uhlala oku akunakwenzeka.
Ukuba awukwazi ukuhlala nabazali bakho, zama ukufumana enye indawo ngokukhawuleza. Yiyo into ekukhuthazwa ukuba yenze kwintsapho encinci kwimeko enjalo. Kukho iinkqubo ezininzi zolutsha ukubonelela iintsapho ezincinci ezinezindlu zazo. Enyanisweni, ukusetyenziswa kubonisa ukuba ipesenti yeziphumo ezilungileyo ekuthatheni inxaxheba kwiinkqubo ezincinci, kodwa kubalulekile ukuzama. Ukuba unako ukuqokelela isamba esithile, ungazama ukuthatha imali yokuthenga imali kwi-bhanki, okanye ukuyichitha kwindawo yokuhlala. Nangona ezinye zeli nyathelo zinokucingwa njengonakalisa, kodwa ungakholelwa, ngoko awukwazi ukubuyisela ububele bakho kunye nolwalamano lwentsapho nangayiphi na imali. Kwakhona, isenzo esinjalo siya kususa omnye umthwalo wemfanelo kubazali bakho, kwaye ubanike ithuba lokuphila ngokuncinane njengoko bafuna.
Into ephambili ayiyi kuthukuthela, ukuba ekuqaleni ungaphumelelanga, iimpawu eziphathekayo - le nto ibingeniso yoshishino, unakekele iimvakalelo zakho nobudlelwane. Yiba nesineke, ukuqonda kunye nobulumko ngendlela yakho. Emva koko, kuphela kunye onokukwazi ukufezekisa, impumelelo enjalo ifanelekileyo.