Indlela yokufundisa umntwana ukuba azimele yena? Akunabo bonke abantwana abaphumelelayo ngokwezigaba zokuzikhusela. Kwiimeko ezininzi, abantwana banzima kakhulu, kuba abanako ukuloyisa ukwesaba kwaye besaba, oko kungabangela ukunganeliseki kobawo. Ngenxa yoko, bazama ukukhalaza ngaphantsi malunga nababenecala, bafihla iimvakalelo zabo, kwaye abazithembi abazali babo. Iingxaki zikhulu ngakumbi, ekubeni ukulahlekelwa inkxaso yabantu abadala, abantwana banokuziva bengenakukhuseleka ngokupheleleyo. Nangona umntwana usengamahloni ekuzalweni, ngoko uloyiko lwehlabathi luya kuba njalo. Kukho iimeko xa abantwana banikwa enkulisa ukuze babe nesibindi, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha. Kulapho naye unokucaphukisa aze ayeke ukuthetha nabanye abantwana. Yayisetyenziswa ukuphuma okungenani ukuba idlale egcekeni, kodwa ngoku ayikwazi ukukhishwa kwisitalato.
Kukho enye ingqongqo. Kukho abantwana abajwayele ukukhawuleza kubaphuli beentsimbi, kunzima ukuzifumana kwiqela kwaye uhamba. Babizwa ngokuba ngama-hooligans, kwaye ngokukhawuleza baphulukise aba bantwana kwi-kindergarten. Kwaye apho imeko abazali bekholisa iinkokheli zontanga ukuba baxolele umntwana wabo, iifom ekhethiweyo malunga nale mntwana. Ngenaye akafuni ukuba ngumhlobo aze adibanise. Kwaye abo bantu abachaswa kwabanye bavutha kakhulu, banomnqweno wokuziphindezela. Yenza inzondo. Kwaye ngisho nasezikolweni, abantwana banokuqiniseka ukuba kukho iintshaba ezizungezile. Kwaye kudala ukuxinezeleka kubantwana, ngezinye amaxesha kubangela ukuba bazibulale ekufikeni.
Indlela yokujongana nale nto? Yonke iyahlukana ibe ziingxenye ezimbini, oko kukuthi isimo sengqondo kubantwana kunye nabazali ngokwabo. Umbuzo uvela: mhlawumbi ngaba abazali ngokwabo baye bafaka izikhalazo zangaphambili, kwaye bazame ukunika abantwana iingcamango zabo ngobomi? Kubuhlungu, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha kunjalo. Kodwa kutheni u novelwano? Ngenxa yokuba le ndlela idala ubunzima obuphantsi kobantwana. Izikhalazo zezingane zihlala zingapheli kwaye zikhohliwe ngokukhawuleza. Ngokuqhelekileyo, utshaba lwezolo luba ngumhlobo omhle, kwaye mhlawumbi okuchaseneyo kuyinyani. Kwaye xa kwenzeka ukuba abantu abadala babhalise ukukhubeka, bafumana ukubukeka okusemthethweni. Kukho amaxesha amaninzi abantu abadala abangakhange baqaphele ukukhathazeka kwabantwana kwizikhalazo ezilula, kodwa bathi nabo abantwana bahlaziswa. Ewe, kukho ukuthotywa ngokwenene, xa ofunda nabo okanye ootitshala bekhubekisa ngokwenene umntu ngendlela enokuhlaziswa ngayo. Nangona kunjalo, amaninzi abantu abadala benza i-molehill kwindlovu, kwaye benza konke oku kubantwana babo kakubi. Ukugxeka kuyingozi kwaye inobungozi.
Umntwana kufuneka akholelwe ukuba ihlabathi lizele kakuhle, ukwenzela ukuba uphuhliso lomntwana luzele kwaye luqhelekile. Ehlabathini, unako ukuhlangabezana nezihlandlo ezithile zobubi, kodwa zihlandlo kuphela, kodwa uhlala unqoba ukunqoba ububi. Kwaye abo bantwana abaye bafumana imfazwe eyingozi, bazama ukulibala zonke izinto ezibuhlungu. Kwaye, ngokuqinisekileyo, kakhulu kwixesha elide lilibalekile kwaye liqala ukuhlala livuya ngakumbi. Ngaba ngabazali kwaye akukho mntu onokukwazi ukuxhasa umntwana wabo kwaye ancede umntwana aqonde ukuba ububele kunye nobulungisa bubajikeleze kangakanani. Umntwana ngokwakhe kufuneka akwazi ukuzikhusela. Ukuba wayenokuzikhusela kubaxhaphazi ngaphandle koncedo lwabantu abangaphandle, kunjalo. Akukho mntu ufuna ukuziva ebuthathaka. Ngelo xesha azinokuzikhusela, abantu abadala abayi kudingeka. Umsebenzi wabazali ukukhusela abantwana kubaphulaphuli, kodwa ngendlela efanelekileyo. Emva koko, abantu abadala, nabo, abanakukwazi ukujamelana nabaxhaphazi ngokwabo, baze bafikelele kumapolisa. Kwaye abaninzi abantu bacinga ukuba bonke abantwana ngoku banomdla. Kodwa awukwazi ukucinga ngomntu onjalo onjalo. Abantu abadala kule nxaxheba badlala indima ebalulekileyo. Ukuba abazali bavumela abantwana babo ukuba baphathe kakubi, ngoko ngokuqinisekileyo abayi kuyeka kwaye baya kwenza into abayifunayo. Kwaye ukuba abantu abadala baya kufundisa, ngoko abafana abagula kakhulu baya kuba obhoytsya ngaphandle kokulwa. Iibergergens ezimbini okanye izikolo ezihlukeneyo, ezikufutshane kumnye, zinokuhluke kakhulu. Ngokuqhelekileyo kukho amaxesha apho ungatshintsha kuphela i-kindergarten okanye isikolo sakho kwaye yonke into iya kuba kwindawo yayo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba lo mntwana uphi na ixhoba le-hooligans, ithetha ukuba akukhona kuphela kwiqela, kodwa kukho into ekhupha abaphuli. Abantu abadala, nangona kunjalo, bakholelwa ukuba uyamoyika wonke umntu. Unokunqoba njani ukwesaba? Okokuqala, kufuneka unqobe ukwesaba kuwe. Kulula ukuba umntwana anqobe ukwesaba xa evikela umntu, kungekhona yena. Oku kukuvuselela okukhulu, njengoko libala amava akhe. Emva koko abantu abadala bathatha abantwana babo kwisisombululo esinokuthula senkqubela kunye nokuzama ukuvusa kumntwana uhlobo oluthethekileyo lomdlali wakhe. Yaye ukunyaniseka, wonke umntu nakweyiphi na ubudala kufuneka akwazi ukuzimela, ngenxa yokuba ubomi bukhohlakele.