Indlela yokuxhasa umntwana emva komtshato womzali

Ukwahlukana kuhlala kuhambelana neemvakalelo, iintlungu kunye nentlungu, kubini abo bahlukana nabo kunye namalungu entsapho kunye nezihlobo eziseduze. Kodwa awona maxhoba aphezulu, ke, abantwana. Intsapho isoloko ithathwa njengeyunithi yentlalo kwaye enye yeenjongo zentsapho yinkqubo yeso sizukulwana esitsha, esinesempilweni, esihloniphekileyo.

Ngoko ke, umbuzo uvela - indlela yokuxhasa umntwana emva kokuqhawulwa kwabazali bakhe, kuba rhoqo, ngamaxesha onke kwakukholelwa ukuba ukuphazamiseka kwentsapho kubangela amanxeba aphantsi kubantwana abangakabonakali. Ukuqonda le ngxaki, kubalulekile ukuqonda ubunzulu beengxaki.

Yintoni e yatshintshayo?

Omnye unokuthi, "Ixesha liphilisa." Kodwa ngaba kunjalo? Ngaba ukwahlukanisa kuvelisa umonakalo ongafanelanga kubantwana? Ngokomnye umagazini kwiingxaki zentlalo, kwenzeka ntoni emva kokuba umtshato uqhawule umtshato, ngoko ulwalamano lwentsapho olwakhiwe ngayo, lunempembelelo embi kwabantwana ngaphantsi komtshato ngokwawo. Nasi kunokwenzeka ukuba kubangele isiganeko esisodwa somcimbi malunga nexhoba lokuqhawula abazali eliye laxelela:

Ndandula ke malunga neminyaka emithathu ubudala, ubaba wamgxotha ukuba ndikhe ndize ndichithe ixesha kunye nam. Wandithenga idoli ehlakaniphile. Emva koko wandizisa ekhaya. Asizange sihlale ixesha elide emotweni. Kwaye xa umama eza kundicima, baqala ukufungela noyise ngefestile evulekileyo yemoto. Ndihleli phakathi koomama noyise. Ngokukhawuleza, uTata wandigxotha esitratweni kwaye imoto yahamba kunye nevili. Andizange ndiyiqonde into eyenzekayo. Umama akazange andivumele ndivule ibhokisi nge doll. Emva koko, andizange ndibone lesi sipho. Yaye akazange abone uyise kuba sele eshumi elinesithoba. (Maria * )

Ewe, kwimeko yale ntombazana, ukwahlukana kwabazali kwazisa ubunzima obutsha ebomini bakhe. Ngoko ke, kuyafaneleka ukuthobela ingqalelo indlela yokuxhasa umntwana emva kokuqhawula abazali. Emva koko, ngamnye wethu unembopheleleko yento eyenzekayo kubamelwane bethu.

Inendima ebalulekileyo yabazali

Ekubeni abazali bobabini bathatha inxaxheba ekukhulelweni, abantwana banelungelo lokuba bobabini nonina. Ngoko ke, ukwahlukana kwabazali kwinqanaba elithile liphule ilungelo lomntwana lokuba nabazali bobabini. Kutheni le nyaniso inyaniso? Eyona nto, emva kokuqhawula abazali, abantwana bahlala kunye nonina kwaye ngamanye amaxesha bahlangana noyise. Abaninzi babo badibana nooyise kaninzi ngaphezu konyaka! Kwaye emva kokuqhawula umtshato, ixesha lokunxibelelana ngokubambisana liyancitshiswa malunga nomhla.

Iingcali ziyavuma ukuba, ngokuqinisekileyo, abantwana baya kulungelelanisa ubomi xa behlala bexhamene rhoqo kunye nomnye umzali. Kodwa ngabazali banokuxhasa njani umntwana emva kokuqhawula umtshato kunye nobudlelwane obusondeleyo naye?

Ukuba ungumama, oku kuya kuba nzima kuwe. Ngenxa yokuba umtshato kunye nentlupheko kuhamba ngesandla. Ngoko ke, ukuzimisela nokucwangcisa okulungileyo kuyimfuneko. Kufuneka ubenike ixesha elininzi njengoko unako, kwaye kunye nomntwana uya kuthatha isigqibo sokuba uza kwenza ntoni ngexesha elibiweyo. Emva koko, ingqwalasela encinci ibhetele ngaphezu kokungabikho. Xa uceba kwangaphambili into ekhethekileyo, umntwana uya kujonga phambili kwesi siganeko enomonde.

Ukuqhagamshelana nomntwana kubaluleke kakhulu. Khuthaza umntwana ukuba abonakalise intliziyo yakhe noko acinga ngako. Abanye banokufumanisa ukuba umntwana unzulu entliziyweni uvakalelwa enetyala phakathi kwebazali. Omnye ucinga ukuba omnye wabazali bakhe wamgatya. Kule nto kubalulekile ukuqinisekisa umntwana ngeempawu zakhe ezilungileyo kunye nempumelelo kunye nothando ngaye bobabini abazali. Siyabulela oku, uza kwenza igalelo elikhulu ekunciphiseni intlungu yengqondo ebangelwa ngumtshato.

Umntwana uphantsi komncintiswano phakathi kwabazali

Ngenxa yosizi nokuhlaselwa kobubi, ngokuqhelekileyo ukuhamba nomtshato, ngamanye amaxesha akulula kubazali ukuba bangabandakanyeli abantwana kule mpi phakathi kwabo. Ngokwezinye iingxelo, malunga ne-70% yabazali baba balwa ngokucacileyo uthando lwabantwana babo kunye nesinamathiselo kubo. Kwaye ngoku, kubantwana aba baziva bebangobango, okuchaphazela kakubi i-psyche yabo kunye nokubunjwa kwayo. Zinkqubo ezahlukeneyo zenziwa. Kukhona uvakalelo lwezono kunye nokuzonda. Ngoko ke, nokuba unesizathu esihle sokukhubekisa kumyeni wakho (okanye umfazi), musa ukusebenzisa abantwana kwiminqweno yakho. Emva koko, injongo yabazali kukuxhasa umntwana, kodwa kungekhona ukuwaphula

Abanye bangabanceda njani?

Ngokuphindaphindiweyo emva kokuqhawulwa kwabazali, ezinye izalamane ziyeke ukudlala nayiphi na indima ebomini yabantwana. Zijolise ngakumbi kwingxabano ngokwayo kunabantwana. Kule meko, abantwana baziva bengenanto. Ngokomaphephancwadi omnye, abantwana emva kokuqhawula umtshato baye baqiniswa, ubuncinci, ngamanqaku athile ahlalayo. Ukuba ungumhlobo osondeleyo lwabo bantwana abazali babo abaye bahlakazeka, bazama ukubakhuthaza kubo - yintoni na abantwana ngexesha lolo bomi obudinga kangaka. Ukuba unogogo okanye utata, funda ngakumbi malunga nendlela yokuxhasa umntwana emva kokuqhawula umzali. Kwiimeko ezinjalo zobomi uyazifuna kakhulu! Xa abantwana bekhula, baya kukubulela kakhulu ngothando lwakho.