Intlanganiso yabazali: iziyobisi kunye nabantwana


Ubomi bwanamhlanje bunjalo kangangokuthi uqinisekile ukuba umntwana wakho uza kukhawuleza emva koko uza kufumana iziyobisi. Izibalo azishiyi izilwanyana. Kwaye, kubonakala ngathi akukho nto enokuyenza ... yeka! Unokukhusela umntwana wakho kule nto kanye kwaye konke! Yenza kuphela ukususela kumntwana obuncinane. Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu ukubunjwa kozimela, ukuhlonipha yena kunye nentsapho yakhe kunye nokumelana nokunyamezela. Kubalulekile ukufundisa umntwana ngokukhawuleza indlela efanelekileyo nekhuselekileyo yokudibana neemfuno zabo. Ngoko, siqala intlanganiso yethu yabazali: iziyobisi kunye nabantwana-isihloko sesingxoxo namhlanje.

Iziphumo zophando malunga nokusetyenziswa kweziyobisi (utywala, iziyobisi) kwizikolo zasesekondari ziyaxhalabisa. Ukusasazeka, ukuxiliswa rhoqo kubantu abaselula kuya kuba yinto evamile. Kubo, olu luhlobo oluthile lokuzonwabisa, lunandi kwaye lunomdla ukuzama. Abavalo ukwesaba ubomi babo - kwaye oku kukuyiyo imeko.

Kukho iinkqubo ezininzi zokuthintela ezikolweni ezijoliswe ekuboneleleni abafundi abanolwazi olunzulu nezakhono eziyimfuneko ukuxhathisa uxinzelelo lwabaontanga okanye imeko. Nangona kunjalo, ezi nkqubo zinciphise amathuba okuphuhlisa iindlela ezifanelekileyo. Indawo ephambili apho inxalenye ebalulekileyo yomsebenzi wokukhusela kufuneka yenziwe yintsapho. Kwaye ke, nokuba umntwana ukhetha impilo yakhe ngaphandle kweziyobisi, ngokuyinhloko ugqiba ukukhuliswa kwakhe kwasekuqaleni njengomntu onelungelo.

Ukwaneliseka ngokukhuselekileyo kwimeko yamava omntwana

U-Andrew wangena kwi-drug addicts ngengozi. Wadibana nomhlobo kwikhonsathi esikolweni. Wayekunjalo nabantu abangaziwayo. Abaselula baqala ukumnika "ukuphumla." Okokuqala, u-Andrew wenqaba - wayechasene neziyobisi kwaye wayesazi ukuba ukusetyenziswa kwabo kubangelwa njani. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, waqala ukuqonda ukuba ebomini bakhe akukho nto inomdla. Wayegula ngenxa yezinto zonke-isikolo, imidlalo yekhompyutha, ukuxabana nabazali bakhe. Kwaye abahlobo bakhe abatsha abazange bamshiye, bamqinisekisa ukuba baya kuhlala bexhasa ukuba akayedwa. Kwaye wanquma ukuzama. Ngexesha elide, iziyobisi zazalisa ukungabi nalutho kunye nokunyamezela awayekuziva kwithuba elithile. Kwaye ke eyona nto yaqala ...

Khumbula:
Umntwana wakho kufuneka abe nomuvo wenxalenye yeqela lakhe - intsapho yakhe. Ungalokothi umshiye wedwa ngeengxaki zakhe. Ekubuntwaneni kwakhe kwasekuqaleni, iingxaki zakhe zibonakala ngathi zincinci, sizitshitshisa, singabandakanyi ukubaluleka. Kwaye umntwana ukhula ngengcinga yokuba akukho mntu uyamkhathalelayo. Iingxaki zakhe azikho nxaxheba kumntu.

Kwakhona kuyimfuneko ukuba "dunk" umntwana kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo ukuze ambone into ekhethekileyo kwaye engaqhelekanga. Ngokuthethileyo, umntwana akafanele akhathazeke ngobomi. Umsebenzi omhle kumntwana yimidlalo, iiklasi zobugcisa, ukuhamba. Umntwana wakho kufuneka afumane amava ekufumaneni iimvakalelo ezinamandla. Makhe athathe inxaxheba kwimincintiswano yezemidlalo, ukuqhuba okanye ukuya ehlobo kwinkampu, umzekelo. Ukungabikho kwemvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo ezimangalisayo yinto eyenza abantwana basebenzise iziyobisi.

Ukuxhasa iimfuno zomntwana wakho kwaye ubanike ukuzithemba. Uyakwazi ukuzikhangela kwiqela kwaye ezama ukufumana iimvakalelo ezinamandla-uncede enze ukhetho olufanelekileyo.

Ukuqulunqwa kwenhlalakahle kunye nokuzithemba okuphezulu komntwana

UDiana wayehlala ehlala ethule kwaye "wanyulwa" yintombazana. Wayesaba, ehlazekile, wayehlala ephuma kuye. Emva kokuqala kwamava kunye nezidakamizwa, ngokukhawuleza wabonwa ngabantu bonke, bekhululekile, benesibindi. UDiana wakhumbula ukuba wayethembele kangakanani kwaye uyavuya. Izidakamizwa ngokukhawuleza zaba zibalulekileyo kwaye ziyimfuneko ekuphumeni kwakhe kunye nomoya wamandla akhe.

Khumbula:
Umntwana wakho kufuneka abe nombono wokuzixabisa. Ukuba awukwazi ukufaka le nto kumntwana, kuya kuba lula kuye ukuba afumane ukuzithemba ngamachiza. Bamenza inkokeli okungenani ngexeshana. Kule ndlela kuphela onokuziva enhle kwaye ekhululekile. Ukuzithemba kwamakhono abo, umntwana ayeza kukuphulukana nayo yonke imihla, unokukwazi ukumnika iziyobisi ngokulula nangokulula.
Fundisa umntwana ukuba afake ukubaluleka kwimpumelelo yabo yansuku zonke kunye nokuphumelela. Mdumise nangenxa yokufezekiswa okuncinci, ungayixabisi umphumo, kodwa iinzame ezenziweyo. Nika umntwana inkululeko enkulu kunye nokuzimela, ngokuba unako ukuthatha uxanduva. Faka ukuthembela komntwana, wazi konke akwenzayo, ukucinga nokuziva. Kumele ube ngumphulaphuli, kungekhona nje umntu "onika into".

Ukuphuhliswa kwengcinezelo yokuxinezeleka

I-Stas yayingazange ibe ngumfundi ontle. Ekhaya, abazali babehlala bethukuthele ngenxa yokungaphumeleli. Wayesaba yonke into-wayesaba isikolo, iimpendulo zabazali kwiimvavanyo, ukugculelwa kwabalingana nabo. Wayesaba, kangangokuba waqala ukubaleka. Wabalekela esikolweni ukuze azihlukanise nabazali bakhe, oontanga. Xa waqala ukuzama ukusetyenziswa kweziyobisi, ngokukhawuleza wavakalelwa kwaye wayekholelwa kwikamva elingcono. Wayekholelwa ukuba isigqibo siya kuvela ngokwawo. I-Stas yayikufumanisa nzima ukukhupha izidakamizwa kunye nemigudu embalwa eyayihlala yenzelwe inyathelo lokwenene. Amachiza atshintshe inyaniso, apho kungekho nto yokwesaba ...

Khumbula:
Umntwana wakho kufuneka afumane amava okuziphatha kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo ezinzima kunye nezixinzelelo. Ukusisombulula ingxaki kuza kufuna ukunyamezela nokunyamezela. Ukuba awuvumeli ukuba umntwana azi ubunzima, akaze afunde ukujamelana nabo. Kunokuba asebenzise iziyobisi okanye iziyobisi eziya kuthintela intlungu kunye neemvakalelo zokungancedi.
Kwiimeko ezinzima, xhasa umntwana wakho, kodwa ungayisombululi ingxaki kuye. Musa ukuyigcina kakhulu kuwe kwaye ungakhuseli kuzo zonke iintlungu. Phendula ngokulile xa umntwana wakho ekhala. Ngaloo ndlela, ufunda ukusuka ebuntwaneni ukuba awukwazi ukufumana ngokukhawuleza yonke into efunekayo yokulwa nayo, kungekho yonke into eyenziwa ngokufanelekileyo.

I-statement, eyayiyimiphumo yentlanganiso yethu yomzali ephuculweyo - iziyobisi kunye nabantwana akufanele bahambe ubomi kunye. Kwaye kusezandleni zethu ukuqinisekisa ukuba abazange baphathe ubomi. Abazali kufanele, ukuba kunokwenzeka, baholele umntwana ngokusebenzisa yonke inkqubo yemfundo ukuba bayilungiselele kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo zobomi. Kubandakanya ukwenza izigqibo malunga nokusetyenziswa kweziyobisi. Nangona kunjalo, isigqibo ngokwayo siya kuhlala sihlala nomntwana.