Intombi yakho eneminyaka engama-8 igijima ihamba nomsila wakhe emva komhlobo wayo, kwaye ibonakala ekhohlakeleyo kwaye ayibonakali ukuba ayihlawule. Okanye unyana wakho oneminyaka engama-13 ubudala, oye wahlala ekhwenkwe ekhulile ekhaya, ngokukhawuleza uzama ukuzuza inhlonipho yabalingana nabo ngokuncedisa i-cigarettes, ukuxabana kunye nokungapheliyo kunye nootitshala. Ngaba kulufanelekile kwiimeko ezinje ukucebisa abantwana okanye ukuwanika ilungelo lokuzibophelela ngamabhodlela kwaye bafunde kwiimpazamo zabo? Kwaye, ukuba unquma ukuthetha, indlela yokukhetha amagama alungileyo, ukuze umntwana angakhubeki, akazange avalile kwaye akugwebe ngenxa yokushiya emva kwaye ungaqondi nto nantoni na? Kuthekani ukuba umntwana akaphulaphuli abazali bakhe kwaye kufuneka ayenze ntoni?
Ukunika iingcebiso, ukuba awuzange uceliwe malunga nalo, ungomnye wemisebenzi engayithobeliyo. Kodwa kunzima kakhulu ukucebisa umntwana lowo, njengokungathi ngumjiki wamatshini othandekayo wakhe, waba ngumntu omncinane ozimeleyo. Ngangobusuku wayengenakuphila imihla emininzi ngaphandle kwakho, kwaye namhlanje ucela ukuba unqabe ukumanga ngesitalato uze uphakamise amehlo akho rhoqo xa uzama ukwabelana ngobulumko bomi. Omnye wololu hlobo lokuzimela angabonakalisa kwiminyaka eyi-8, kunye nomntu ongekho ngaphaya kwama-14. Kodwa nakweyiphi na into, oku kuza kuba yinto emangalisayo kubazali. Ukuzimela kuyisoloko isikhubekiso kulwalamano lwabazali nomntwana omdala. Kwaye, ukuba ngokuphendula ukuzama ukuthetha intliziyo entliziyweni, ufumana ukucaphukisa, ukukrokra kunye nokugubha iingcango, uyazi: awunabo. Kodwa, nangona abantwana bezama ukuzimelela baze baphile iingqondo zabo, kusemncinci bebuntwaneni bafuna inkxaso yabazali babo kunabo bonke. Nsuku zonke bafunda into entsha malunga nesakhiwo seli hlabathi. Bamele benze izigqibo ezinzima ezinxulumene nobuhlobo, uthando lokuqala, ubudlelwane nabantu abadala. Kwaye kuphela abazali abanganika iingcebiso eziyimfuneko. Into ephambili kukuba uyenze ukuze umntwana akuva.
Shiya ukugxeka nawe
Ingxaki i-Psychologists iphindaphinda iphinda: ukuba ufuna umnxibelelwano ukuba akuve, kufuneka uxoxe ngokuzithelekileyo ngaphandle kokubonisa iimvakalelo ezimbi. Oku kuthetha ukuba ngamazwi akho akufanele kube necala, akukho bushushu, akukho mangalo, akukho ukugxeka. Ndikholelwe, nokuba umntwana oneminyaka emihlanu ubudala unokukwazi ukwahlukana ngokugqithiseleyo ngegama, umama uyamthukuthelela okanye cha. Yintoni ongayithetha malunga nentsha! Enye into kukuba kunzima ukuthetha ngokuzithelekileyo, xa uphinda uphinda amagama afanayo ngamakhulu amaxesha, kwaye umphumo unjalo. UAna, unina oneminyaka engu-12 ubudala u-Artem: "Kunyaka owedlule sathutha, kwaye iNhloko yahamba kwisikolo esitsha. Kwakudala wayengumfundi obalaseleyo, ootitshala bakhe bamthanda baze bamxolela inkululeko enkulu. Ngokomzekelo, unxibe iinwele ezinde, ugqoke kwisitayela semidlalo kwaye ngokubanzi ngokuzimeleyo. Esi sikolo esitsha, wuleza wathola ulwimi olufanayo kunye nabafana, kodwa kunye nootitshala beklasi kanye kanye, iingxaki ezifanayo zaqala. Ngenxa yeenwele zakhe ezinde kunye neengqungquthela zeerpers, wambhalela kwizintlanzi. Uqikelelo emva kwekota yokuqala lubonakalisa: ezine eziseRussia, i-algebra kunye nejometri, kwaye ngokubhekiselele kwibali lakhe eliyintandokazi (efunyenwe nje ngutitshala weklasi) - amathathu amanqaku. Kwaye nangona kunjalo ukuba wayezama ngokwenene! Kodwa yintoni eyasuswa esikolweni esidala esikolweni esidala, nasiyimbangela yenkinga - wayibala i-notebook, watsho into ethile kumfundisi okhalilileyo, "wachaza uluvo lwakhe", endaweni yokuphendula isabelo. Konke oku kuye kwahlulwa amanqaku. Ndixelele unyana wam amaninzi amaninzi ukuba kufuneka ube nothobekile, uhlonipheke, kwaye unomdla kubafundisi. Konke akunamsebenzi. Kodwa kwiholide emva kwekota yokuqala sasiya kuphumla, kwaye ekugqibeleni ndafumana indlela efanelekileyo. Wathi into enje: "Zama ukuzibeka kwindawo yomfundisi kwaye ujonge umfundi omtsha ukusuka kwicala. Le ndoda inezinwele ezinde, ibhulukhwe yakhe ibanzi kwaye ixhomeke kakhulu kangangokuba izigulane zingabonwa ngaphantsi. Ootitshala abachazi ukuba uyafunda kakuhle, kodwa sele sele eqonda ukuba unengqondo yakhe enzima kuyo yonke imiba. Ungayithatha njani abantu abadala kulo mfana? "U-Artem wandijonga ngomsindo, waza wathi:" Kulungile, ndiya kucinga ngako. " Kwakuyi nkqubela, kuba ngaphambi kokuba afike, kwaye akafuni ukuva nantoni na! Kwaye emva kokuqala kwemimangaliso yethu yokubuya: unyana waya kumntu onwele intloko kwaye - hayi, akazange anqumle iincwele zakhe ezimfutshane, kodwa ubuncinci wazincothula iinwele zakhe. Waqala ukuhlamba yonke imihla. Wandibuza ukuba ndithenge amabhulu amatsha esikolweni. Kwaye ekuqaleni kukaDisemba, utitshala weklasi wayenomhla wokuzalwa, kwaye unyana wamnika isipho. Kubonakala ukuba wayeziphatha ngendlela eyahlukileyo esikolweni. Ekupheleni kwekota yesibini, igumbi lokufundela landibiza kwaye ndathi ndineenkwenkwezi ethandekayo, ukuba ngaphantsi kwempembelelo yentlangano eye yatshintshile phambi kwamehlo akhe, imisa emine kwimbali, kodwa ukuba kunjalo, iya kuba yintlanu.
Isifundo omele ufunde
Kwimeko enzima, wena, mhlawumbi, uzakuhendeka ukubeka ingcinezelo kumntwana, kuba abantu abadala bayazi kakuhle! Kodwa oku akunakwenziwa. Eyona nto ingcono kakhulu, ukuba uyaphumelela ekuhlwayeni ukungathandabuzeki kwengqondo yomntwana: ingaba ndiyenza into efanelekileyo? Ukuba umntwana ucinga ngako, mhlawumbi, uya kwenza isigqibo esifanelekileyo. Kwaye-oko kubaluleke kakhulu - kuya kuba yisigqibo sakhe, kungekhona esenziwa ngabantu abadala. Yaye ukhumbule imithetho elula yokuthetha: abantwana babengazi kakuhle ixesha elide kunye neengcamango ezingabonakaliyo ngobomi. Ukuba ufuna umntwana wesikolo ukuva kwaye uqaphele isiluleko, khuluma ngokufutshane, ngokucacileyo uze wazi ukuba awumangaleli.
Vumela umntwana ukuba enze isigqibo
Xoxa ngeendlela, kwaye nangona intombi inika into ebonakala ingalunganga kuwe (sukuma isigxina seyure kamva kwaye ulungele isikolo kwiminzuzu elingu-10), makangayama iveki. Kunzima kubazali ukujonga indlela abantwana benza ngayo iimpazamo. Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha iimpazamo ziyimfuneko nje ukufumana izigqibo ezifanelekileyo. Ukuba intombi izama ukuyenza ngendlela yakhe kwaye iqinisekise ukuba oku kusebenze, ngexesha elizayo uya kuphulaphula ngokucophelela amagama akho.
Ngexesha elifanelekileyo, kwindawo efanelekileyo
Ukuba ulawula u-unobtrusively ubhale icebiso lakho kwingxoxo yosuku lweveki, amathuba okuba uya kuvezwa ukwanda ngamaxesha amaninzi. Naka ingqalelo xa umntwana wakho ehlala esetyenziswe nawe ukuthetha. Omnye ukhawuleza ukwabelana ngokubonakalayo emva kwesikolo, umntu uthanda ukuthetha ngaphambi kokulala, kwaye umntu ufumana amandla oku kuphela kuphela ngeveki. Ukuba umcimbi oza kuxoxwa kubaluleke kakhulu, linda ude ubabini uhlalise. Abantwana banomdla kakhulu kwiimeko zengqondo zabantu abadala, kwaye ukucaphukisa kukukhusela ukuba ucinge ngokucacileyo. Xa izithandwa zivutha, kungcono ukulinda iintsuku ezimbalwa. Ngeli xesha uzonqabisa uze ukwazi ukujonga ngokuthe ngqo ngolu hlobo. Kwaye emva kokuqala ukuxoxa ngezinto ezenzekile.