Abazali abamkela umntwana, kungekudala okanye kamva bayazibuza ukuba kulungile ukuxelela inkwenkwe inyaniso malunga nayo. Kwaye ukuba uthe, ungathini na nini na umntwana ukuba uyamkela?
Ukuba umntwana eba nomdla kumbango wokuzalwa kwakhe, ngoko ulungele ukufumana ulwazi abazali abangabelana naye, kuphela kufuneka abe sisondele kwi nyaniso kunokwenzeka. Umntwana akafanele acinge ukuba ukhohlisiwe.
Kuze kube yiminyaka emine, abantwana abanakunomdla kwindlela abazalwa ngayo. Abacingi ngexesha elidlulileyo okanye elizayo, kodwa bahlala nje kumzuzu wamanje. Ngako oko, into ebaluleke kakhulu kweli xesha kukudala umoya wokukhanya nokuvisisana kwabo. Kubantwana ngeli xesha, into ephambili yinto abazali abavakalelwa ngayo ezintliziyweni zabo malunga nokutholwa.
Ngomlinganiselo ofanayo, kufuneka uqalise ukulolonga ukukholelwa komntwana ukuba abazali abavayo baqhelekileyo kwaye akukho nto iphosakeleyo. Unokwenza oku ngeentlobo zeendlovu, apho abazali bahlolwe khona (kungakhathaliseki ubuntu bakhe), imifanekiso kwimidlalo kunye nezinto ezinjalo.
Abantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka emine baqonda yonke into echazwe ngabazali babo, ngokoqobo. Ngoko, ngombuzo womntwana, ukusuka apho wabonakala khona endaweni yamabhinqa nge-stork okanye iklabishi, unokuthi unayo ngokwakho, oko kukuthi, yamkelwa. Ekubeni umntwana akakwazi ukuqonda ukuba lithetha ukuthini leli gama, uya kuqhubeka ecinga ukuba ungumzali wangempela, ngelixa ufunda inyaniso.
Xa umntwana ejika ezintlanu, uqala ukuba nomdla kuyo yonke into ehlabathini. Kule ngongoma ukuba kuyona nto ingcono ukutyhila umntwana ukuba yimfihlo yokuzalwa kwakhe. Baya kunceda kakhulu lo msebenzi, bezama ukufunda intsingiselo yamagama.
Zama ukuphendula imibuzo yomntwana ngokucacileyo, ngokucacileyo okucacileyo, ngokukhawuleza nangokulula, ngokwezinga lakhe lophuhliso. Ungazami ukuthetha naye njengomntu omdala, uxela ngokuhamba kwabazali bakhe ngeenkcazelo ezilukhuni - akayiqondi, kodwa uyamthusa.
Bhekisela kwingxoxo inyaniso yokuba kukho abazali abanjalo kwihlabathi abanokuzala kunye nokuphakamisa umntwana wabo, kunye nokuba nabo banokuzala, kodwa abanako ukufundisa. Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, ukuba kukho abo abangenakuzala, kodwa bafuna ukufundisa, kwaye ke ngoko abazali be sibini banikela abantwana babo okwesithathu, ukuze wonke umntu abe nolonwabo.
Zama ukuba uzilungiselele ukuba umbuzo womntwana ngokubonakala kwakhe kwintsapho iya kuphakama ngaphezu kwesinye. Oku kunokwenzeka ngenxa yokuba abantwana baninzi badinga ukuva into emininzi ukukhumbula le nto nokubeka iingcamango ezicacileyo malunga nayo. Ngokuphindaphindiweyo, zama ukuqiniseka ukuba umntwana uye wakuqonda ngokuchanekileyo. Kwakhona, ngenxa yoko unako, umzekelo, cela umntwana ukuba abuyele ibali lokuzalwa kwakhe kumathoyizi akhe, ngelixa, xa kuyimfuneko, ukulungisa.
Ixesha lesishumi elivisayo, okokuba, emva kokufikelela kwiminyaka elishumi elinambini, akunakubizwa ngokuba yiyo yonke into efanelekileyo yokuxubusha ezo ndaba, kuba ngaloo mzuzu umntwana ubuza yonke into, ukuziva kwakhe kunye nokuzithemba kuya kutshintshintsha njalo, kwaye nawaphi na amagama angaphandle angakwazi ukudibana noogonyamelo . Kwiimeko ezinjalo, iindaba eziye zalahlwa, kwaye zamukelwa kwaye akaxelelwa inyaniso ngeli xesha, zinokuba zibuhlungu kakhulu, ngoko ukuba unokwenza isigqibo sokwenza ingxelo ngoku, kubalulekile ukuba ukhethe ngokucophelela ukhetha ixesha kunye namazwi, oko kuza kuhanjiswa.
Ngomzuzu xa unquma ukuxelela umntwana ukuba ungumntwana, kuyimfuneko ukuba phakathi kwakho akukho nto ingquzulwano kunye nokungquzulana, njengoko oku kunokumsebenzela ukuba afaneleke ukulungelelanisa zonke izinto eziqhubekayo ezinxulumene naye. Phawula kuye ukuba uyamthanda, kwaye imvelaphi yakhe yezinto eziphilayo ayidlala naluphi na indima kuwe.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, kuya kuba bubulumko ukuxolisa kumntwana ukuba ufunda inyaniso emva kwexesha. Zama ukuyichazela ukuba kuwe wayehlala ezalwe kwaye wayengafuni ukumlimaza. Kwaye ngoko unako ukuthetha naye ngeenyawo ezilinganayo, ubale ngokuxhaswa nokuqonda komntwana.