Amadoda ngokusemgangathweni awayiyo imvakalelo. Zingqiqo, injongo yabo eyintloko kukuba benze izigqibo kwaye benze umsebenzi wenyama. Ngakumbi, oko banokukwazi ukubonisa iimvakalelo - kunengqiqo ukuvakalisa iingcamango zabo malunga nekhanda lakho elitsha, bathi, kuhamba ngokupheleleyo. Indoda inqwenela ukukhawulela kwisivakalisi esinye kwaye ungangeni kwiingxaki zokuncoma okufunekayo ngamanye amaxesha. Kodwa, mhlawumbi, akakwazi nje ukuba kuya kuba mnandi ukuba uvule iimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo zakhe? Zama ukumfundisa ukuba achaze oko kubonakala kulula kwaye kuyimvelo kuwe, into engathethiyo ngaye, ngenxa yokwesaba ukujongana nobuthathaka kunye nowesifazane.
Umfazi nomntu: uziva - ucinga.
Iingcali zengqondo zizimisela ngokuchanekileyo isizathu esenza ukuba amadoda akwazi ukuvakalisa iimvakalelo zabo malunga nomfazi obala. Kwaye nayiphi na imvakalelo. Oku kunokuqondwa kalula ngexesha lokuphononongwa kwefilimu edibeneyo. Ukuba isiphetho sakhe sibuhlungu ngokungazelelwe, ngoko umfazi uyavuma ukuba uyadabuka, uyaphoswa okanye ayikho into emnandi ukubona ukuphela okunjalo. Umfazi uthetha ngokucacileyo malunga noko akuvakalelwa, kungekhona oko akucingayo. Le ndoda yakhawuleza ibetha kwiingxelo kunye nokuvavanya: "isiphelo asikuphumelelanga" okanye "ifilimu inomdla, kodwa yonke into iphelile ngandlela-thile." Uyazi amagama anjalo kunye neengcamango? Ewe, umntu ovela ebuntwini ubizwa ukuba acacise iingcamango, anike yonke into uvavanyo, hlalutye yonke into aze ayithelekise yonke into. Oku kufana nentsapho yakho. Uya kubavavanya ngo "kubi" kwaye "kuhle." Indoda ngokwemvelo icinga kwaye ihlalutye, kunye neyinkwenkwezi-ivakalelwa kakhulu. Ngoko ke, abafazi abaninzi bahlala bevisisana nemvakalelo yabo, kulula ukuba bafumane ukudibanisa nabantu abahlukeneyo. Ungatsho ngokucacileyo umhlobo ngokucacileyo: "Nguwuphi na intombazana enhle! Ndiyakuthanda kakhulu! ". Yaye ukuba umntu ofanayo uya kumxelela umhlobo wakhe? Ngaba singambiza emva koko umntu? Ngoko phambi kokumangalela umntu othandekayo ukuba umntu akabonakalisi iimvakalelo zakhe, cinga ngeendlela ezithintekayo zoluntu.
Imfundo yamadoda nabasetyhini ihluke kakhulu. Uhlobo oluphambili luhlala kwiinjongo zobomi ezahlukeneyo kunye nezinto eziphambili. Abasetyhini bafumana ukukhuliswa, ekuqaleni bajolise ekufezeni impumelelo nokukhula komsebenzi. Yingakho bekhululekile ekuvakaliseni iimvakalelo zabo. Indoda ifundiswa ukususela kwiminyaka yobudala ukucacisa ngokucacileyo kwaye ngokucacileyo iingcamango zakhe kwaye zibangele iimvakalelo ezingadingekile. Umama ukususela esemncinci uvuselela inkwenkwe: "Musa ukukhala - ungumntu! "Njengokuba akanako ukucaphukisa, ukukhalazela nokuva intlungu ... Ngenxa yoko, umntu omdala akabonakalisi iimvakalelo zakhe, ukuze angabonakali njengobuthathaka.
Kucacile ukuba le ntokazi ayibandakanyeka kumzabalazo wokusinda, ohlala ebonakaliswa kukuqonda kwamadoda okwenene. Kwaye, konke okufanayo, ukudala ubudlelwane obumnandi phakathi kwendoda kunye nomfazi akuyiyo inkundla yokubambisana kunye nokufumanisa ukuba ngubani omele into ethile. Abantu bahlala ndawonye ngenxa yothando, okumele kufundiswe indoda ukuba iveze ngokupheleleyo.
Yiba ngumcebisi womzwelo.
Ngaphambi kokuba ube ngowomthandi wakho kwaye umfundise ukubonisa iimvakalelo ezivulelekileyo kuwe, hlenganisa ukuba akukho nto iza kuba lula kwiphumo efunwayo. Yiba nomonde kwaye uhlambele kumntu. Khumbula ukuba uqobo wakhuliswa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Kungenxa yemfundo kwintsapho yabazali ukuba wakho umthandayo uye waba nguyena kwaye uphantse akabonakalisi iimvakalelo.
Ngokuqhelekileyo abafazi, xa bezama ukufundisa wabo othandekayo ukuba bavule ngakumbi nangokomzwelo, qalisa ingxoxo ngamagama athi: "Ndikunike ngaphezu kokubuya kwam," okanye: "Kutheni unganditsheli ngothando? "Iimangalo ezinjalo ziza kubakho nto. Akukho mntu oqhelekileyo uya kunyamezela uxinzelelo kunye nokumangalelwa, ngoko uya kuqala ukuxhathisa. Eyona ndlela, iya kuba yincinci: "Uyazi ukuba ndiyamthanda, musa ukuphinda uyiphindise rhoqo! ". Kwimeko embi, loo mntu uya kuhamba. Awunakufumana ukwaneliseka nangayiphi na indlela, ukukhupha "ukuvuma" okunjalo kuye. Ukuphendula kwendoda kuya kukukhubekisa, kukufaka ingxaki malunga nemizwa yakhe. Uza kwenza isigqibo sokuthi bonke abantu bayizidalwa ezingenangqondo kunye nezibizo!
Ngoko ke, isinyathelo sokuqala omele ukwenze ukuvuma ngokungathandabuzeki kwintanda endiyithandayo ukuba ungathanda ukuzisa ulwalamano olusenyongweni lwakho. Ngamanye amagama, qalisa uqala ukuthetha naye ngolwimi lweemvakalelo! Ekuqaleni le ndoda iya kuqonda olu lwimi njengelinye ilizwe, liyakubonakala libonakala lilukhuni kwaye lingenakuqondakala. Kodwa ukuba uyamthanda ngokwenene indoda ehlakaniphile, uya kuba nako ukunqoba naziphi na iingxaki kwaye ufunde ngempumelelo ulwimi olutsha ngolwalamano.
Indlela yokuthetha ngolwimi lweengqondo.
Abasetyhini bathetha ngolwimi lweemvakalelo ngokungabikho. Ngokomzekelo, unako ukuva kwintombazana ibinzana elithi: "Ndandithukuthele." Indoda ayidla ngokuvakalayo ukuba into enokumcasula okanye umntu. Uyakwazi kuphela ukungena kwizigwebo zokuvavanya: "Kule meko wayengafanelekanga", okanye: "Andiyithandi". Isigama salo mntu kwintsimi yeemvakalelo kunzima kakhulu, isimo sakhe sengqondo kuyo yonke into echaza kuphela "ngokulungileyo" okanye "okubi."
Indawo efanelekileyo kakhulu ukuqala ukufundisa umntu ukuveza iimvakalelo zakhe. Esikhundleni sokumxelela emva kobusuku obuhle: "Ndiyithande", okanye: "Kwakulungile" -vakalisa iimvakalelo zakho ngqo. Yenza igama elithi "elungileyo" ngokuthi "elumnandi, elonwabisayo, elimangalisayo, elithandekayo," njalo njalo ... kwaye ke unokuqiniseka ngokubuza malunga neemvakalelo zakhe. Awuzange ugxininise kwintetho yolonwabo, ngoko-ke, makabelane naye ngezinto ozivelayo! Vumela inzululwazi ibonise iimvakalelo zakho uya kuba ngumfundisi, kwaye yena-umfundi. Kwaye umgaqo omkhulu kuwe, masibe "ukuphindaphinda - unina wokufunda."
Eli bhinqa lifuna ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukuva amazwi athandekileyo: "Ndiyakuthanda." Akunjalo ngenxa yokuba akaqinisekanga ngothando, kungekhona ngenxa yokuba uyesaba ukuba akayithandi, kodwa kuba amazwi omthandayo ayamnceda! Amagama amathathu athandekileyo akwenza ukuba ukwazi ukuziva kakuhle uthando lomntu! Xa zonke izinto zilula kwaye zicacile, umfazi uzele iimvakalelo ezimnandi kwaye ufuna ukuzinikela kwihlabathi kwaye ujabule.