Echoes of Childhood
Okokuqala sifanele siyiqonde: kutheni sisinqabile namhlanje ukuba sidibana neqabane eliqinileyo elomeleleyo?
Ukuphendukela kwiinkcukacha, ungabona: kwiminyaka embalwa edlulileyo, iziko lentsapho liye lafumana utshintsho oluthile. Ukuba ootatomkhulu nobunzima babenzima ukwenza isisele esomeleleyo nesingabhubhiyo kuluntu, ngoko, emva kwexeshana, lo mkhuba waqala ukunciphisa izikhombisi. Abafazi bazikhulula ekunqweneleni ukuba bazimelele ngesondo esomeleleyo bafumana imimiselo ethile emphakathini, bathatha isikhundla esitsha kwaye babeziqhenya ngokwenene ngempumelelo yabo. Ukuzimela kwabafazi bebuhlungu ngenxa yokuzithemba kwabantu - bayeka ukuziva bazikhuseli. Abanye banqwenela ukushiya kumntu onamandla, ukuze bagweme uxinzelelo emqaleni weentliziyo zabo. Kwaye sabuyifumana ntoni?
Uninzi lwabasetyhini abanamandla kunye nabantwana kwiingalo zabo, abakhululwe ngabafazi, kodwa abantu abahluphekayo ngenxa yedwa.
Ngoku ake sicinge - yintoni na umntu onokuyinyusa umfazi kunye nomsebenzi wakhe? Ibhinqa elingenamntu, ngaphandle kwezandla ezinamandla, ngaphandle kokuxhaswa ...
Mhlawumbi, nantsi imbewu yokuhluma kwamadoda ashukunyiswa ngothando lomama kunye nokukhuthazwa (okungenakukhunjelwa, ngokuba yonke into unomuzwa onecala phambi kokuba unyana wakhe akhulele ngaphandle koyise, nangona ukuzisola kwakufihliwe phantsi kweso sikhundla somfazi weshishini). Le nkwenkwe yayingazange ibone phambi kwayo umzekelo ofanelekileyo womntu ofanelekileyo, phambi kokuba amehlo akhe ahlale ekhanyisa abafazi abathi, bevela emsebenzini, bepheka ukutya kunye nokuhlamba iimpahla, nangona kubaluleka kwintlalo. Imfundo yamaMama ingaba yindoda, kodwa yimbi kakhulu - umntwana usetyenziselwa ukulawula ubulili obuthakathaka kwaye uzive engenamandla.
Enyanisweni, ukhetho lokuphuhlisa inyana kwintsapho enjalo inokuya kwelinye ithrekhi - kwaye umfana, eqonda ukuba unesondo esomeleleyo, uya kuqala ukuphazamiseka ilungelo lamalungelo kwintsapho yakhe. Kodwa le ncinane inokukhulela i-misogynist ephosakeleyo ehlala ibuye ibuyele kwakhona isihloko sayo esithi "othwala".
Njani ukuyiqonda?
Akuyimfuneko ukuqwalasela ukuba indoda yamabhinqa inokunqunyulwa yi "radar" yakho ngokubonakala komnye kuphela - umzekelo, uhlobo lwayo lweengubo apha alukho nto. Uya kubona ubhinqa kuphela ngokuthetha nalo mntu. Indoda enjalo isengozini kakhulu kunabanye. Ngamanye amaxesha, ephikisana nawe, akayi kugcina (kwaye mhlawumbi angagcinanga) iinyembezi, akuyi kulungelelanisa ngezandla zakhe kwaye akucele ukuba umxolele nangona akenzanga.
Amadoda anjalo ngokuqhelekileyo amnandi, baya kuhlala banika iingubo zabo, bavulele umnyango wokutyela, bancede baphume emotweni. Imisitho yowesifazane osemtsha, obalaseleyo nangona usebenza kwimicimbi yansuku zonke. U-Pridyak ukutyelela, emva kokutya, umfana onje, mhlawumbi, wakhawuleza wakhawuleza ukuba ahlambe izitya, engakulibali ukubeka iifowuni.
Uya kukuxelela ngemini yakhe yokusebenza ngokucacileyo, engalibali ukukhankanya ixesha lokuphumla kwemini kunye nemenyu kwiinkcukacha. Emva kwakho konke, uya kuvuma, ukukhangela kwenkcazelo, kunoko, impawu zobunqunu, ngelixa abantu, inxalenye enkulu, bengathandi ukwenza inkcukacha kwaye bazikhathaze ngokwabo ngamaxesha amade.
Ukuba kufike ekwenzeni isisombululo esibalulekileyo okanye esincinane kwisigqibo esibalulekileyo-umntu onjalo uya kuzicingela ngesisombululo ixesha elide, ecinga yonke into enokukhetha kwaye ngelixa elinye eyikayo ukuphosa. Yilungiselele ukuba uya kuqhagamshelana nani naluphi na uncedo: indlela yokufumana iingono? Indlela yokupheka i-borscht kwizinto ezikwifriji? Indlela yokuziphatha njengomntu osebenza kunye naye, ngubani ozama ukugubha umhlaba phantsi kweenyawo zakhe? Indlela yokuqhuba udliwano-ndlebe ngengomso kwaye ungaboni ubuso nobuso kwidaka?
Umfana osemoyeni uza kufunyanwa kwindoda ekhuselekileyo ye-iopor, edla ngokufumaneka kumntu nayiphi na intombazana.
Umntu wesifazane: inzuzo kunye neengxaki
Emva kokufunda konke oku ngasentla, amantombazana amaninzi angayifumana ingcamango: "Fi, njengokungathi bayichaza i-slobber, umntu ongenakulungele ubomi, kutheni ndifanele?" Nangona kunjalo, musa ukukhawuleza ukubeka umnqamlezo kwi-soft, ekubonweni kokuqala, umntu obuthathaka. Emva koko, unayo i-pluses yayo:
- Indoda yowesifazane ilungele umfazi othanda ukuyalela. Umfana osemthandweni uya kwenza nayiphi na i-whim yesiqingatha sakhe - kwaye ngelo xesha awakubonakali kwintombazana ekhuphukile.
- Indoda enjalo ayiyi kulahlekelwa yintloko xa kufuneka ilawulwe uqoqosho ngokwayo. Unako ukuqala ukucoca ngokuqhelekileyo, ukupheka isidlo sakusihlwa, ukuchukumisa ikhandlela malunga nomjikelezo wetafile ... Ukuhlala kunye nomfana onjalo, akufanele ukhathazeke ukuba ekungabikho kwakho uya kutshabalalisa, ukubulala iiglasi okanye ukukhukula abamelwane bakhe - umlinganiselo wokuba ucocekile kwikhaya lakhe kubaluleke kakhulu kuye , kunakho.
- Awusoze uzive ucinga ngendlela epholileyo kunye nokuhoxiswa kuwe. Amanye amadoda ngale ndlela azama ukubopha intombazana esondele kuye - athi, undigijimela, uya kufeza-kwaye uya kuthandana ngakumbi. Kwimeko yethu, baya kuzama ukukufumana, nangamahloni, ngaphandle kwamagama aphezulu kunye nezenzo zobuqhophololo - kodwa awukwazi ukunceda uzive ukuba uyenzela ngothando kangakanani.
- Amadoda amabhinqa, ngokuqhelekileyo, athile kakhulu. Bathanda ukwenza intlekazi kwintombi yabo yentliziyo: babhala izinkondlo, bayeke umnqweno wokuba unomdla omhle phantsi kwe-magnet efrijini, unike iintyatyambo ngaphandle kwesizathu, thabathe amathikithi e-movie ngomqolo wokugqibela ...
- Ukufumana ukukhangeka kwintombazana, nokuba umntu okhuselekileyo kunye neentloni, uya kukwazi ukwenza isenzo somntu, ingakumbi ukuba umbuzo uphathelene nokukhuseleko kwakho - nokuba kunjani na, akunakuze ufune ukumbetha.
Ngomfazi obuninzi ngokwempawu yenkwenkwe yakho intsha ungayifumana iifayili zakho:
- Akudingeki ukuba uthembele kakhulu kwinto yokuba umntu uya kwenza izigqibo ezinzulu ngobomi - lungele ukuthatha uxanduva kuwe nakwezenzo ezincinci kuwe.
- Ukuze umntu onamahloni kunye nobuthathaka ukuba athole umsebenzi ohloniphekileyo, uya kuphephelelwa kuwo. Kuya kuba nzima kumntu ukuba aphume phambili kwinqanaba lomsebenzi, nangona unolwazi olwaneleyo kunye nezakhono zokuphucula. Uninzi, mhlawumbi, unengqiqo, kodwa asebenzayo kunye nabasebenzi abaxhasayo kule plan baya kuzityhalela ngokukhawuleza.
- Ukuba awukuthandi kakhulu iifowuni rhoqo kunye neenkcukacha, ukuba unothando olungathandabuzekiyo - usenokucaphukiswa ngexesha elide nomnqweno ongenakunqwenela ukuchitha kunye nawe yonke iminithi yamahhala. Kodwa ngaba kubi? Mhlawumbi akuyena yena, kodwa i-minus yakho ...
- Abathandi beenkampani zomsindo baya kuziva bexinekile phambi kwendoda enjalo: akulula ukuphumla, ukubamba ukubukeka kwakhe okubuhlungu, kukucela ukuba ushiye wonke umntu kwaye uhlale naye yedwa.
Akunakutsholwa ukuba ibhinqa yintombi - ngokuqinisekileyo ilungile okanye imbi kakhulu. Kunoko, umfazi ngumntu - oku kuphazamiseka ngokupheleleyo. Ngokuxhomekeke kwimeko yentombazana ngokwayo, umntu uya kufumana umntu ongakholwayo kunye nomlingane ojongene nokuphila, kwaye umntu uya kuqonda ukuba ufuna izandla ezinamandla nezithembekileyo zesandla - kwaye ke amadoda athathaka angasakwazi ukukubamba ixesha elide.