Zonke zifundwa ngokuthelekiswa?
Iingcali zengqondo zithi ukuthelekisa kunye nawe kunye nabanye kukubonakalisa isimo somntu. Ngako oko, akunakwenzeka ukuba upheleke. Nangona kulungelelwano kufuneka kuqatshelwe ukuba abanye abantu bathatha le nkqubo ngakumbi, abanye bangaphantsi. Ekubeni lo mzekeliso kaninzi alukho, iingcali zicebisa kakhulu abafazi ukuba bashiye ngokukhawuleza le mkhuba eyingozi. Kuye kwenzeka ukuba akayi kusenza nto ngaphandle kokudandatheka.
Kufuneka ukuba ukhumbule ubuntwaneni bakho obuhle kwaye buqhakazile, ukuqonda: imvelaphi yeembandezelo zethu zanamhlanje zikho ngqo. Ukuqala kwi-kindergarten, kwaye kweso sikolo, besihlala sifundiswa ukuncintisana, ukuhlaziya iimpumelelo zethu nabanye abantwana babantu. Inyani kukuba abazali abaninzi banqwenela ukubona abantwana babo "njengona nto ininzi kakhulu". Kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo abantu abadala abanalo nonke abanomdla malunga nolwazi olunzulu lwabafumanayo esikolweni. Kubo, kubalulekile kuphela into - ukuba intombi ibonwa njengomfundi wokuqala kwiklasi. Kwaye kungcono nakwiziko lonke. Kodwa ngale ndlela, oomama nabazali bafundisa abantwana babo ukuba baqhathanise ngokuqhubekayo iimpumelelo zabo kunye nabanye. Oko kukuthi, ukuhlala kwihlabathi leengcamango ezihambelanayo, kungekhona. Kulungile, ukuba umntwana onjalo, xa ekhula, akayi kuba mania. Kodwa bangaphi abantu abafazi abadala abakhathazeka kakhulu kulo!
Kukho esinye isizathu esivumela ukuba siqinisekise ukuba kwisizukulwana seengcamango ezinjalo kubasetyhini abazali babo kufuneka basolwe. Xa izigulane zeengcali zeengqondo zazingamantombazana amancinci, zazihlala zikhuliswe ukuze zihlale zibuza iitalente zabo nobuchule. Kwaye naziphi na izinto aziyi kuzingca. Abazali bakholelwa ukuba oku kuya kubasindisa ekudakaleni kwixesha elizayo. Kwaye kwenzeka ukuba yonke into iyafani! Baqhubeka nokuvavanya zabo ithuba lokuba "troyka", kunye nabanye abantu bacinga ukuba kuyinto engavamile. Kwaye oku, okwenyani, akunakongeza ekuvuyiseni kwabo. Ewe, kwaye bakuphi na, ukuba bayagcinwa kuphela kwizinto abangazifumaniyo. Kwaye kwangexesha elifanayo bayalibala ngeempumelelo zabo, eziza kufunyanwa rhoqo kulowo nalowo wethu.
Abasetyhini baphendukela kwizengqondo zengqondo, obomi babo bube bunzima. Xa iintombi zabo zenza into enhle, ingaba i sweatshi okanye i-Ph.D. isissis, ziza engqondweni ngengcamango eyodwa ebenza baxakeke. Le ngcamango yokuba nabo abayi kuze bakwazi. Nangona kuqhelekile ukuba abafazi abanjalo bakhononde ngento ethile, akukho nto: intsapho eqinile, ubomi obukhuselekileyo, intloko eqaqambileyo. Kubonakala ngathi ufuna ukuvuya? Kodwa hayi, abayikhumbuli. Kwaye baziva bengabalulekanga, apho ungahamba khona. Ngendlela, kunokwenzeka ukuba umntu uvela ngokwenene.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, abazali benza enye impazamo kwimfundo, ngenxa yokuba abantwana babo abanenkani ukufuna ukukholelwa kwi-solvency yabo. Uninzi lwayo luya khumbula ukuba oomama bakho - ngokubhekisele kumbhalo ocacileyo okanye ngokugqithiseleyo - bafakela kuwe, amantombazana asetsheni, ukuba ubomi bubonwa ngempumelelo kuphela kwimeko ethile. Ngokunjalo, ukuba luye lwaphuhliswa ngokwemodeli ethile. Ngokomzekelo, umyeni ocebileyo onenkathalo, abantwana abaningana abaneengcali kunye nokuphakama okuphezulu. Ngoko ke abafazi beselula banokufundiswa kuzo zonke iindleko zokuzama ukufikelela kwiindawo eziphakamileyo. Kwaye baninzi abahlala kwihlabathi, ixesha elide liluhlu lwezinto abafanele bayenze. Kodwa ekubeni kungekhona wonke umntu okwazi ukufanisa, kutheni ke kuyamangalisa ukuba amawaka amantombazana amahle aziva ukuba alahlekile!
Ngokuqhelekileyo abanye abantu babonakala ngathi xa beqhathanisa nabo baphumelele kuphela ngenxa yokuba bafuna ngamandla ukusiqinisekisa oku. Kwaye, banomthetho, ngokulungileyo kakhulu. Ukuzifakazela, umhlobo wakho unokugxininisa kakhulu impumelelo yakhe. Uya kuzama okusemandleni akho ukujonga emehlweni akho uvuyo kunokuba kunjalo. Futhi musa ukumgxeka ngoku. Emva koko, abaninzi abafazi, ngokweengcali zengqondo, benza ngokungazi kakuhle, oko kungengenjongo. Kwaye konke ngenxa yokuba umnqweno wokuzithobela ekukhanyeni okuhle kukubekwe kwindawo yobume. Ukongezelela, kuchatshazelwa yinto enqunywe nguMama ekukhuliseni ukukhupha indlu.
Emva kokuba isiguli esiqhelekileyo sifika kwi-psychologist esaziwayo kwaye sathi kwiinkonzo zakhe ayengasadingeki: waphiliswa ngethuba. Kwiiseseshoni zangaphambili zengqondo, umfazi onenkqantosi yobuso bakhe wayekhalazela ukuba ngenxa yokubanda kwonyana wakhe omncinci, kwafuneka ahambe emsebenzini kwaye ubomi bakhe babonakala behlulekile. Kwaye kwangokunjalo wahlulwa ngumona omnyama xa wayebukele intsapho yommelwane onolonwabo owayesandula ukuya kwindlu yakhe. Umama olungeleyo, ochaphazelekayo, uyise ohloniphekileyo, intombazana enomothekayo kunye nentlonelo ... Bonke aba bantu babebukeka bebuhlungu kangangokuthi baphuma kumfazi ukuba banokungenakukwazi ukufumana uxolo nonwabo. Kodwa yintoni eyammangalisa ngayo, xa ephuma kwinqanaba labantwana besazibonela ngephanyazi ukuba kule ntsapho ekholiswayo kukho umntwana omncinci olele ebhedini enezifo ezingenakuphiliswa. Yaye loo ntombazana ngokukhawuleza yaba neentloni ngaye, ngokubanzi, ubomi obucebileyo.
Iingcali zengqondo ziyazi esinye isizathu sokuba baninzi bethu bazama ukuzithelekisa thina kunye nabanye, ukuthelekisa iimpumelelo zethu nabanye. Ukunciphisa ukuzithemba komntu kuwele, unamandla ngakumbi ukufuna ukuziqhathanisa nomntu. Kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba uya kucinga ubomi bakhe ngabanye. Kukho imeko ephazamisayo: nangona loo mntu akwaziyo ukuba ahlolisise njani amandla akhe, kodwa kubonakala ngathi isizathu esithile sokuba unako ukuvavanya ngokuthe tye ukufumana abanye.
Ngokukodwa ubomi obungenasiphelo bahlobo kunye nabaqhelana nabo bubonakala kulawo maxesha xa ubomi bethu bungahlali ngendlela engcono. Ngoko, esinye isigulane sanikela umzekelo ocacileyo: kuphela ukugula nomntwana wakhe omncinci, njengoko ngokukhawuleza uqala ukuvakalelwa kukuba abantwana bakhe bahlobo bahlala bekhukhumeza ngempilo. Kwaye ukuba umntu omdala ufumana amabini esikolweni ukuze aphumelele, amaqabane asebenza naye malunga nempumelelo yomntwana wakhe kwi-olimpiad kwiimathematika abonwa njengesikhwama setyuwa kwilonda.
Musa ukuphelelwa lithemba!
Kwimeko apho kufuneka ufumane iimvakalelo ezikhankanywe ngokukhawuleza, qalisa usebenze ngokwakho ukuze uzilahle. Oku kuya kuba lula kuwe, ngokukhawuleza uqonde uhlobo lwamava akho. Kwaye kuyimfuneko ukuyilahla, kuba ukuzithelekiswa ngokwabo kunye nabanye kungakuchukumisa ukudandatheka, ukuhlala uxhalabile, ukuziva unomdla ongenakulinganiswa. Kwaye kukho-ukuphonsa ilitye kunye nokutshintsha kwezinto eziphilayo kwimpilo. Kuphi, ke, ukufumana amandla kwizenzo ezinkulu!
Ukuba kude kube ludlulileyo uvuyiswa kakhulu kuwe kwaye emva kokuba udibene nomntu ngokukhawuleza wadideka kwaye waqala ukungathandabuzeki ekuzihloleni kwakho kwangaphambili, khumbuza ngokwakho ngokubanzi: ungazikhethela le ndlela yokuphila ngokuzikhethela kunye nenkululeko yakho yokuzikhethela. Ngoko, ihambelana neemfuno zakho kunye nomlingiswa. Kanti akwaziyo ukuba uya kuziva njani kwezinye izicathulo zomntu.
Kukho enye ingongoma ebalulekileyo engenakukuphosakelwa ukuba ufuna ukuhlala noxolo lwengqondo kwaye ngokuvisisana nawe. Yazi ukuba akukho mntu onjalo owake wazalwa enenhlanhla kuyo yonke into. Kwaye nangona uthe waqhagamshelana nomhlobo wakho ongathandabuzekiyo, khumbula: uxelela kuphela malunga noko acinga ukuba uyazi. Kwaye akukho lizwi ngaphezulu! Kwaye okwangoku, ugweba ubomi bomhlobo kwimifanekiso enhle kakhulu, kwaye ukholelwa ukuba yonke into injalo. Kuwe kuya kuba luncedo ngakumbi, emva kokuphulaphula ibali lempumelelo yakhe, ukuhlula yonke into ngo-10.
Musa ukulibala ukuba nayiphi na ubomi, kubandakanywa neyakho, luluhlu lweentlobo kunye neentsikelelo. Kwaye ukuba awunjalo ixesha elonwabileyo lobomi, kwaye intombi, ngokuchaseneyo, yonke into ihlelekile, yile nto engeyona nto leyo eyenza ukuba uzive ungento. Kodwa gcina ingqalelo enye into engenakuphikiswa. Ukuba emva kwexeshana uza kuba utshintshisa indawo kunye nayo. Kwaye ke, ngokuthelekisa ubomi bakhe kunye neyakho, uya kuba neengxaki zokuwa.
Xa wena, ngombono wakho, into ethile ayihambelani kakuhle, hlalutye ngokucacileyo imeko. Khangela izinto ezintle kuyo kwaye ucinge kuphela ngabo. Ekugqibeleni, khalaza ngobomi bomntu osondele kuwe. Ngomgudu wokukuthuthuzela, yena ngokwakhe uya kukubonisa iintlekele ezibonakalayo zobuntu bakho. Kwaye kwangaxeshanye ninovuyo kunye nomhlobo, olunge ngoku. Nabani na umntu oqhelekileyo uyaziva ekhululekile xa abantu abasondele kuye beyaneliseka ngobomi babo - ababuki, abakhonanga. Emva koko, ukuthetha nabantu abonwabileyo kuthetha ukufumana umthamo onempilo kubo.
Ungalahlekelwa yinto ekhethiweyo. Kungenzeka ukuba umhlobo wakho, onjengawe, uthelekisa ubomi bakhe kunye nawe. Mhlawumbi yena, ucinga ukuba ungumntu ophumelelayo nofezekileyo. Ngaba kuyimfuneko, ngoko, ukuba ndibone oku xa kuthelekiswa kunye nam nabanye?