Omnye wabo uhlala kunye nabazali bakhe, phantse ngaphandle kokuziva ukubahluko phakathi kwezi zibini zobomi bakhe: ngaphambi nangemva komtshato. Omnye, owafika kwintsapho elitsha kuye, unenkxwaleko enkulu, kunye nokukhathazeka kwengqondo.
Ayikho ingozi ephikisanayo kwiimeko ezinjalo zivakala phakathi kwentombi-mkhwenkwe nomkhwekazi, umkhwenyana nomkhwezala. Nangona kunjalo, akudingeki ukuba uhambe phambili, makhe sizame ukuqonda ukuba ziphi iingenelo eziphambili kunye nokungahleleki kokuhlala kunye nabazali, zeziphi izibangela eziphambili kakhulu zengxabano, yintoni enokuyenza ukuze unqobe, kunye nendlela yokuhlala kunye kunye bazali. Eli nqaku luza kuba luncedo kubafundi abasandul 'ukutshata, kodwa nabazali babo abafuna ukwenza ubomi babo babonwabele kwaye bulula njengoko kunokwenzeka.
Iinjongo eziphambili kunye nokuphazamiseka kokuhlalisana nabazali.
Nangona kunjalo kungaqhelekanga, isenzo sithetha ukuba ezinye iimpawu zokuhlala nabazali zingaba zizinto ezintle kunye neyona nto ebangeleyo ekuphuhliseni ubudlelwane babantu. Makhe siqwalasele iingongoma eziphambili, kunye neengxabano eziqiqayo kunye nabo.
- Ukuhlala nabazali babo, isibini esitshatileyo siphila okanye siphila ngokusemgangathweni kwizinto eziphathekayo nezokhuseleko lwemali. Abazali bomnye wabatshatileyo, ngaphandle komkhwa, baqhubeka bexhasa intombi yabo (okanye unyana). Abantu abasandul 'ukutsha kufuneka badle imali yokuqeshisa indlu yokuhlala, ukuhlobisa imeko, ukuthenga izixhobo zendlu. Oku kunikeza ithuba elikhethekileyo lokuqokelela imali engaphezulu kwendlu, iholide kunye nezinye izinto zokuzonwabisa. Kodwa imeko enjalo iya kubakhokelela ekuxhaseni ngokwenene kweso sibini esilungileyo, ukungabi namandla okuzimela kwiimeko ezahlukahlukeneyo zokucwangcisa uhlahlo lwabiwo lwezentsapho.
- Ubomi obuqhelekileyo kwiintsapho ezimbini ezahlukileyo zinganceda ngokuqinisekileyo ukuxhasana kunye nokuncedisana ngokubanzi kwiimeko ezininzi ezinzima kunye neengxabano , ezibandakanya imfundo yabantwana, ukugcina indlu, ukuxazulula iingxaki zengxaki. Enyanisweni, abantu abaninzi abayi kunqaba ukwabelana ngeengxaki zabo nomnye umntu. Ukukhathazeka, ukuxhamla, ukukhathazeka kwabanye abantu kuya kuqinisa kuphela ubudlelwane beentsapho. Nangona kunjalo, akusikho nto ukuba ibinzana eliqhelekileyo "abafazi abahlukeneyo kwiikhikhini elinye abayi kuze bahlangane" akusiyo nto. Umkhwenyana akanakuthanda nonke, njengoko uninazala unonyamezela umntwana wakhe othandekayo, umkhwe wakhe akanelisekile ngethelevishini eye yalungiswa ngumyeni wakhe - kwaye ingqiqo yenkxaso yodwa ayilindelekanga!
- Abazali, njengoko sele sele bekhulile kunye nabantu abanamava banokubanceda abo basandul 'ukutshata kunye neengcebiso ezifanelekileyo nezifanelekileyo, ngokukhawuleza bazithumele ngokufanelekileyo ngempumelelo "umzila". Kulungile xa isibini esitshatileyo sisidinga isiluleko esihle kubazali babo kwaye xa sinikwa ngendlela enomdla kwaye kungekhona. Ukuphendula okungafani ngokupheleleyo kunokubangelwa yinconywa, eyanikezwa ngetoni ehlelekile. Ukususela kumacebiso amaninzi aphendulekayo njengemiyalelo engathandabuzekiyo, nini, yintoni na indlela yokwenza ngayo, isibini esitshatileyo sinqwenela ukukhanyela, kwaye baninzi - singabanaki kwaye niyenze ngendlela yabo.
- Umzekelo omhle wobudlelwane obufudumele kunye nohlobo oluhle kakhulu lunokuba luncedo kwaye luyimfuneko kubantu abasha abaselula. Kucacile, kuphela ukuba ngabazali banomtshato oqinileyo kwaye onomdla, osekelwe kwintlonelo kunye nokuqonda. Ngaphandle kokuphela, abazali abaphikisanayo, umtshato wabo ogqityiweyo kwimigangatho, baya kukwazi ukubeka ubungqina obungathandekiyo ubudlelwane obusanda kuvela kwintsapho.
- Ukunyamekelwa kwabazali nokunyamekela. Abanye abazali abasetyenziselwa ukunyamekela umntwana wabo othandekayo bathathwe ngumkhwa phantsi kwephiko kunye nomphefumlo wakhe. Ukunyamekela ngokukhawuleza okokuqala kunokubanceda abantwana abadala, kodwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi baya kubacinezela. Ukongezelela, indlela efana nayo iya kuhlakulela i-infantilism phakathi kwabaselula abaselula, kunye nokungakwazi ukwenza izigqibo ezizimeleyo kunye nokungabikho ngokupheleleyo kweengcamango zabo.
- Ukunxibelelana okungaxhamliyo nabazali ngexesha leeholide kwaye ngexesha lokuphumla kuya kuzisa ukwaneliseka okwanelisayo phantsi kwimeko yobunye beminqweno, ukutholakala kwezihloko ezichaphazelekayo nezichaphazelekayo kumacala omabini. Ukungakwazi ukuseka uqhagamshelwano, isithuba soqhagamshelwano siza kudala iingxaki ezongezelelweyo ezongezelelweyo kwaye ziqhube ngakumbi imeko.
Izizathu eziphambili zokuvela kweengxabano.
Isibini esitshatileyo siphila nabazali babo kunzima kakhulu, ngoko ke kuya kubakho iimbambano ezahlukahlukeneyo, eziya kugqitywa kunye. Izizathu zokubunjwa kweengxabano nabazali zingafani kakhulu. Nangona kunjalo, njengomthetho, babumbene kwiimeko ezininzi kuphela ngokubonakala "komfokazi" okanye ilungu elitsha lentsapho endlwini. Ngoku siza kuqwalasela esi sikhulu kwezi zizathu, ngoko kuthetha, jikelele.
- Ukungafuni ngokukhethekileyo , okanye "Andizange ndifune loo ndoda intombazana yam intanda!" Ukuziphatha kakubi okanye ukuchasana nomkhwenyana okanye umalokazana ophuhlisiwe ngaphambi komtshato ungenye yezizathu ezibalulekileyo zokuvela kweengxabano phakathi kwabazali nabantwana. Inokuchazwa yiziphi na iinjongo kwaye ibe nebala elihlukileyo lokubonakaliswa: ukusuka ekufihliweyo ukuya kwiindawo ezichasayo. Kakade ke, isibini esitshatileyo esitshatileyo kule nkcazo siya kuziva ukucinezelwa kwengqondo, ukukhathazeka okungapheliyo. Ukuphucula umnxeba kule meko kunzima, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha akunakwenzeka.
- Ingxaki zezindlu , okanye "Uza kukhulula nini ekuphumeni kwindlu yokuhlambela?" Kucacile ukuba xa ilungu elitsha lentsapho livela, kuya kuba nobunzima kwimpilo yemihla ngemihla. Kubonakala ukuba abazali baya kufuneka benze imibingelelo baze bayeke imikhwa ethile ngaphambili. Umzekelo omncinci kakhulu: umninazala akayi kuba nethuba lokuhlala ixesha elilodwa okanye ezimbini kwindlu yangasese enephephandaba ngesandla, ngenxa yokuba umkhwenyana okwangoku uya emsebenzini, kwaye naye, unqweneleka ukutyelela indawo "ethandekayo". Kucacile ukuba "ukuxhatshazwa" okunjalo nakweyiphi na imeko kuya kucasula amalungu omndeni, kwaye oku kuyaqondakala.
- Uluhlu oluphawulekayo kwiminyaka yobudala , okanye "Lapha uza kuphila kum ubudala , ngoko uya kubona." Umbuzo ongafiyo wooyise nabantwana, xa abameli bezizukulwana ezahlukeneyo bengakwazi ukufumana ulwimi olufanayo. Kwaye nangona uluvo lomntwana othandekayo luye lwafunda ukuqonda kakuhle, lwamkela kwaye luphulaphule, ilungu elitsha lentsapho liya kuba nzima kakhulu, ngakumbi ekuqaleni.
- Ukuphazamiseka kwiimbono , okanye "Kodwa intsapho yethu ayisoze yenza njalo." Ngokuqhelekileyo, ingxaki efanayo ifakwe ukuba iintsapho zabaselula zineenkcubeko ezahlukeneyo nezengqondo, zimeli zohlanga ezahlukeneyo, abalandeli beenkonzo ezahlukeneyo, bathembela kwizinto eziphambili kwizinto zokuphila. Ngobusuku, akunakwenzeka ukuba akhulise "ngaphandle" "ngokwakho", kwaye kwiimeko ezininzi kunzima.
- Ukwahlukana okubonakalayo kwizinto eziphathekayo kunye nemali yeentsapho , okanye "Kutheni sifanele sihlawule yonke into?" Ibali leCinderella elinobubele nelikhutheleyo lifanelekile kuphela kumxholo wefestile. Xa imeko enjalo iyenzeka ebomini boqobo, bonke abathathi-nxaxheba bayo banzima kakhulu. Ngokuqhelekileyo, usapho olutsha luhlala kunye nabazali abangcono kwimali. Kwaye kamva, oku kuvela ngokwemvelo kubangelwa izikhalazo ezincinane kunye nokunganeliseki malunga nokuba kufuneka banakekele abantwana, bahlale bebanceda, kwaye babeke ezinyaweni zabo.
Unokuphila njani ngoxolo nabazali bakho?
- Zama ukuthetha ngakumbi omnye nomnye.
- Qalisa ingxoxo yeengxaki njengoko zivela.
- Zama kunye ukuze ufumane indlela yokuphuma kule nto okanye loo meko.
- Hlalani nithobela kwaye nijonge imibono yomnye nomnye.
- Abantwana banyanzelekile ukuba bahloniphe amava kunye nobulumko babazali babo, kwaye abazali babo, kufuneka baqonde ngokucacileyo ukuba abantu abaselula banokwenza izigqibo ezininzi ngokwabo.
- Zama ukutshintsha uhlobo lweedesi kwiintsapho zakho ezintsha: esikhundleni sokuba "umkhwekazi" - tsho unyoko, esikhundleni sokuba "umalokazana" - kungcono ukuxelela intombi yakho, njl.
- Ungaze uphakamise ilizwi lakho komnye nomnye.
- Zama ukuba neentlonelo, ukunyamekela, ukukhathazeka ngezikhathi ngempilo kunye nemvakalelo yomnye nomnye, soloko ujabulela kwimpumelelo kwaye uhloniphe ngokuthethelela.
- Musa ukulibala malunga neengcebiso ezingabonakaliyo kunye noncedo olufanayo.
- Ungavumeli amandla angasebenzi aqokelele.
- Ubungakanani bentliziyo yakho, okanye isifiso esininzi, kuba - nokuba uyayithanda okanye awukho - ngoku unesihlobo.
Kungcono ukuba isibini esitshatileyo sihlale nabazali babo, okanye sisafumana indawo eyahlukileyo?
Kodwa ke, yintoni impendulo echanekileyo kulo mbuzo? Ewe, yonke into incike ngokupheleleyo kwiimpawu zobuqu bobudlelwane kwintsapho nganye. Yaye ukuba, emva kokufunda ngenyameko eli nqaku, uqaphele ukuba kuya kuba nezizathu ezintle zokuhlala kunye nabazali bakho, ngoko ke ukuba ukuhlala nabo phantsi kophahla olulodwa kuya kuba mnandi kwaye kukhululekile. Nangona kunjalo, ezininzi zeengqondo zentsapho zithi zilungele ukufuna ubomi obuzimeleyo nokuzimeleyo. Ngaphambili intsapho engenakunamava ayifaka kwi-free and easy-to-be-drainage, kulula ukuba kubekho kwixesha elizayo ukufumana umsebenzi kulo msebenzi obunzima. Oku kuya kuqinisekisa ukuzithuthuzela ngokuziphatha, ukuzithemba okukhulu, ukunyusa kakhulu ukuzithemba. Ewe, kwaye khumbula ukuba abazali bonke abayi kukwazi ukunceda, kwaye kamva, ngokuchaseneyo, sele ufanele uzinakekele.