Ziziphi iinjongo ezikhuthaza umfazi oqolileyo ukuba afune ubudlelwane kunye nabafana? Ubudlelwane phakathi kwamakhwenkwe namancinci angaphezu kwama-30 - isihloko siyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu kwengqondo. Impendulo yalo mbuzo inzima. Oku kuyimfuneko yentlalo, yomzimba, yengqondo kunye neyendalo. Ngokuqhelekileyo aba bafazi abasele bafezekisa impumelelo ethile emsebenzini wabo, banemali eyaneleyo kunye nokuzinza kwemali. Owesifazane ozinzileyo kunye ozimeleyo, onokwakhe oyintloko kunye namava obomi bendalo. Akakwazi ukungafuni ukuya kwingubo, okanye ekuphumleni, okanye ebomini. Engqondweni, uyaqonda ukuba akaselula kakhulu, kwaye ubuhle bakhe abuhlali ixesha elide, kodwa abameli abesoloko benamkela. Ewe, uya kufuna ukufumana ithuba lokuba aphinde abuyele eselula kunye nentsha, kuba sele esenexesha elininzi lokwenza, ukuguqulela amanye amaphupha amantombazana angafaniyo. Kwaye amadoda asebudala bakhe aphelelwe ngumsebenzi, ukukhathazeka kwekhaya akukhathali ngokubhekelana ngesondo, ngoko ke unika umkhethe kumncinci, onako ukuqonda iimfuno zakhe. Zonke ezi ntshukumo ziya kuphakamisa ukuzithemba kwayo, kuya kunceda ukuba uzive unqwenelekayo, isondo kunye nentanda.
Kulo mfazi, olo luvo luzisa iinzuzo ezicacileyo. Ekugqibeleni unokufumana yonke into esuka kwintombazana enobubele kwisini, engayifumani ngexesha leminyaka yobomi obusenyongweni kwimitshato okanye ubudlelwane obudlulileyo. Wonke umntu uyazi ukuba abantu abatsha banamandla kunye namandla. Ngoko, le nsizwa idla amandla akhe umfazi ovuthiweyo, isondo kunye naye - lo ngumthombo wobutsha. La majazana abancinci abhula kunye nokuhlaziya phambi kwamehlo abo, banamandla amakhulu kunye namandla. Oku, ngokuqinisekileyo, kufana ne-vampirism yamandla. Kodwa, ukuba umfazi uthatha amandla kumhlobo wakhe, ngoko kubonakala kakhulu kubo, kwaye, ukuba umfana omncinci, amandla akhe amakhulu agcinwe ahlaziywa rhoqo. Ngoko ke, kulo mzekelo, inkqubo yokukhutshwa kwamandla yinto yokuzikhethela kwaye ayiyingozi. Kodwa, ibhinqa lisibongo nje kuphela ngenxa yokunyuka kwamahomoni kunye nokunyuka kwamandla ombane. Eyokuqala yinto ebona inqanaba lesibini yengqondo. Emva kwayo yonke, phambi kokuba baqubude, bayayithanda, bafuna ekupheleni. Uyaqonda ukuba umfana omncinane phakathi kwamawaka amabhinqa kunye namantombazana amantombazana amkhetha kuye.
Yintoni ekhokelwa ngamadoda amancinci, ukukhetha umfazi osebudaleni? Kwimeko nganye, injongo yayo iqhutyelwe. Kodwa, ukuba sithatha imeko eqhelekileyo, ke inzuzo kuluhlu lwezentlalo kunye nesondo. Umfana omncinci ufumana iqabane kumfazi onamava, ngubani onokumnika ngaphezu kweentanga zakhe, onokwazi ngokwenene ukwenza nantoni na, yenza ezininzi iimpazamo ezingenakuthoxiswa kwintlalontle, kunye nobuncinci bomgquba. Ngethuba lethu, amanyathelo ezinyunyana ziye zenzeka rhoqo kuba abafana abancinci abasombulula iingxaki zabo zomsebenzi ngeendleko zabagcini babo abacebileyo. Iba ngumngcipheko, uzalisekisa zonke izinto zakhe kwiindawo ezithandana naye, kwaye yena, ngoncedo lwemali yakhe kunye nokudibanisa, uyamkhuthaza ekwenzeni umsebenzi.
Ewe, kukho ubudlelwane obuphezulu kule candelo. Nangona oku kunqabile kakhulu, xa umntu osemncinci eyanelisekile kwaye enombono omdala ebomini ongafihli "ubomi bomntu omdala" ngeendleko zakhe, kodwa nje uzingca kwiimeko zakhe kunye neengqondo zakhe zisondeza kwi-social elite. Lo mntu akalalanga ngesondo kwindawo yokuqala. Uthanda ukuba inxalenye yobudlelwane babo ngakumbi, apho ungathetha khona. Emva koko, uyamxabisa kwiqabane lakhe nolwazi nolwazi lokuthetha naye. Unomdla wokuthetha naye, ukufunda into entsha kunye neyomfuneko ebomini. Akanelisekanga ngamantombazana amancinci, angenamava kunye nabangenalwazi abanomgangatho ophantsi weengcaphephe. Ngenxa yomlingane wakhe oqolileyo, uyaziqinisekisa, anelisekile. Ukuzibonakalisa yena kunye nabanye ukuba yena, umfana osemncinci, ubaluleke kakhulu kumfazi okhulileyo nolwazileyo. Akakhathaleli ukunqoba iintliziyo zamantombazana amantombazana, kuba bonke oontanga bakhe benza, kwaye kulula kakhulu ukwenza. Kodwa oko akwenzayo kubonisa ukuba unokunqoba zonke iintonga.
Ubudlelwane phakathi kwamakhwenkwe kunye nabasetyhini abangaphezu kweminyaka engama-30 abukwazi ukuhlala ngonaphakade, ngokukodwa, njengawo nawuphi na. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba umfazi ufuna kangakanani ukuhlala emncinci ixesha elide, iminyaka ivakalelwa. Kwaye, omncinci indoda, ekuqaleni uqala ukujonga amantombazana amancinci, enomzimba oqiniweyo kunye nobuso ngaphandle kwemibimbi. Yaye ubudlelwane buya kusuka kwinqanaba "lomthandi-mthandi" ukuya kwinqanaba "unyana womama." Ngendlela, ezo zengqondo zentsebenziswano zifumaneka rhoqo kwisicwangciso sobudlelwane. Umfazi ngazo zonke iindlela ezikhusela umlingane, kwaye naye, uzive ekhuselekile phantsi kokunyamekela kwakhe. Ubudala obuphezulu kakhulu bokungalingani kobudlelwane ngumlinganiselo phakathi kweminyaka emihlanu ukuya kweyesibhozo. Ewe, umncinci umehluko, ulwalamano oluninzi ngakumbi. Ukwahlukana kwiminyaka emibini kungabonakali, kungaphantsi kwelishumi - kungekhona kakhulu, kodwa ngaphezu kwelishumi -hluko obunobungozi. Ngokwemvelo, umfazi unokuzama ukuzigcina enqabile kwaye ekhangelele kuncinci kunokuba uyinyani. Kodwa konke kuvunyelwe ngokumodareyitha. Awudingi ukugqoka njengentombazana kwaye usebenze njengomntwana. Gcina imida yobudala, ngoko yonke into iya kuhamba kakuhle.
Ngokubanzi, kukho izizathu ezahlukileyo zokudala ulwalamano olunjalo, kwaye iinjongo ezahlukeneyo zilandelwa. Ewe, imitshato enjalo ebudeni babo bemifutshane, ngenxa yazo zonke izinto eziyaziwayo, ngokukhawuleza okanye kamva, ziyahlukana. Unethuba elincinane lokuqhubela phambili ixesha elide kunezo zobudlelwane apho indoda indala kunowesifazane. Kodwa oku akusiyithintelo ekudalweni kwabo.