Ukuphindezela umntu owayesakuba ngumntu wokuqala: iingcebiso

Yeka indlela ebuhlungu ngayo ngamanye amaxesha nathi bantu, izolo, babenomonde kwaye bathembisa ngokusithandayo ukuba basithande bonke ubomi babo, basinike ulonwabo baze basikhusele ngokunyamekela, ukusihlalisa kwizoMoya ezisixhenxe! Ewe, izolo yonke into yayingumnkantsha kwaye inkulu-kwizithethe ezingcono kakhulu zamabali ngamakhosazana kunye neenkosana zabo. Kodwa namhlanje ulindelwe iindaba ezibuhlungu: umfana wakho othandekayo unqume ukuhamba, ngaphezu koko, ukushiya ungathuli kwaye uzinzile, kodwa ulungiselele ukuba ube nesicatshulwa ngokwenene kunye neengxabano zendawo malunga nokuba unobungozi bunjani, kwaye ukuba awuzange ulungele iimbono zakhe. Kodwa iSvetochka ukusuka emnyango olandelayo ungumlingani wangempela, uyazi ukuba yiyiphi into efunwa ngumntu ngamnye. U-Svetochka uya kumnceda. Ukuvakalelwa kokuqala ukuba ufumene, ukhangele emnyango, emva kokuba uthando lwakho luye lwaphela, ngumnqweno wokuziphindezela. Inqaku lethu "Buyisele kwinkwenkwe yangaphambili: iingcebiso" ziya kunceda ukucutha le ntliziyo kwiimashalofu kwaye sinqume ukuba njani?

Enyanisweni, ukuphindiselela kumntu owayengumntu, amabhunga kunye neenjongo zayo eziphambili, akukho nto intle. Ngokuqhelekileyo le ntsizi ewonakalisayo iyaphila entliziyweni yethu kwaye ayivelisi nayiphi na imveliso yangempela. Siyakwazi ukucinga ngethuba lonke ngaphambi kokuba ulale ngolu hlobo ngokuzivuyisa ngokuphandle kwintombi yakho yangaphambili, indlela ahamba ngayo ngobukhwele, indlela azama ngayo ukubuyisela. Kule ngcamango, uyaphulaphula intliziyo yakhe kwaye, ngokuhleka ngokukhawuleza, uya kudibana nenjabulo entsha. Ukuphindezela kuyakuba nzima.

Emva koko unokwesaba, cinga malunga nesifiso esinamandla sokuziphindiselela ngumqondiso wentsholongwane ethile yengqondo. Ngaphandle kwayo, le mvakalelo iyimpawu kubo bonke abantu abalahliwe nabakhohlisiwe. Kuphela apha akuyiyo yonke into ayiphala ngayo nayiphi na imisebenzi. Ngokuqhelekileyo uvakalelo lokuziphindaphinda lukhawuleza ngokukhawuleza, ingakumbi ukuba unako ukuzibamba kwaye uvumeleke ukuhamba kwithuba elidlulileyo, ushiye ngasemva kwaye ungacingi malunga nokuba kwakunjani. Impindezelo yomntu owayengumntu uyancitshiswa into yokuba uyayikhohlwa, kwaye yintoni enokuba buhlungu ngaphezu kokungabandakanyeki, okwenene, kwaye kungekho nto? Kodwa kukho enye inxalenye yamantombazana - ukubuyisela kubo - invakalelo efuna ukuyiqonda, awukwazi ukuyidla ngokuthula, ayikwazi ukulala ebusuku, ukutshisa kakhulu kuya kuba yimfuneko yokubangela ukuba umntu owayengumntu intlungu. Siza kunika icebiso elisebenzayo, injongo yalo iya kuba yelisekile loo mfuno.

Okokuqala, musa ukukhawuleza ungene kwi-swirl yokuphindezela, kanye nje emva kokuba umntu owayesakuba ngumntu wangaphambili wayeshiye ubomi bakho. Intukuthelo iseninzi kakhulu, unako ukukhawuleza, ungacingi kwaye uphawule izinto, kuba kuya kuba nzima kuwe. Ngoko ke, zama ukupholisa phantsi, cinga ngeemeko.

Mhlawumbi iqabane lakho alizange lishiye nje? Emva koko, isigqibo esinjalo, esichaza ulwalamano lwakho, sinokucaphukisa ngokuziphatha kwakho. Unobumba obukhulu, ungafuni ukwenza izivumelwano, ngaphandle kweyiphi enye ibini ayikwazi ukuyilawula. Wayehlala enomona ngabo bonke abantombazana adibana nabo kwaye "baqhayisa" ukujonga ngakwesobunxele nangakwesokudla. Mhlawumbi wayeziphathe kakuhle ukuze abe neentloni ukuba abe nawe? Ngaba ke impindezelo esinokuyithetha ngayo? Mhlawumbi ufumene oko ufanelweyo? Musa ukucaphuka emva kwamagama, kodwa kwenzeka.

Nangona kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha ubomi busibeka kwiimeko ezinjalo ezinzima xa, ngokwenene, ngaphandle kwengqondo yokuziphindezela, akunakuyenza, kwaye iyancipha kwaye iguqise ngakumbi nangakumbi imihla ngemihla, ifuna ukuphindisela. Emva koko funda iiluleko zethu kwaye uthathe isigqibo - wenza ntoni kule nkalo ethile (kwaye ngokwenene amacala ahluke, kwaye impindezelo ingaxhomekeke ngqo kwiimeko).

Uyazi, akusiyo nto abayithethayo ukuba ukungakhathazeki kunzima kakhulu kunokugqithisa kunye nomnqweno wokulimaza, obonakalayo kwiso. Unjalo uhlobo lomntu - nangona sihlala kunye nomntu, ngeli xesha elithile sifuna ukubona. Yintoni enzima kumntu ngaphandle kwethu kunzima. Bona indlela ezama ngayo ukusibuyisela. Yintoni na? Ukuzimela, ukuzithemba. Emva kwakho konke, ngokuqinisekileyo, kwaye uye waziva ufumana ingqiqo yokwenene yobunini, ubukele indlela inkwenkwe yakho yangaphambili inokukulibala kwaye ilungiselele ubomi bakho? Kwindoda, le mvakalelo iphinda iphuculwe, kufuneka nje ibone iintlungu zangaphambili.

Ngoko ke, umsebenzi wakho wokuqala awuyi kubonisa umntu owayesakuba ngumva, ukudideka kwakhe nokuzisola. Ngaphezu koko, akunqweneleka ukubonakalisa ngokucacileyo isimo sakho sengqondo esinolaka. Ingqumbo iyona mqondiso wokuqala ukuba awukhathaleli. Kwaye, oku kwakhona, ukunyanisekisa into engekho. Yaye ukuba uthe wagqiba ukuphindezela, musa ukumvumela ukuba aduduze ngomsindo wakho. Ukugqithisa, ungakhangeli phantsi, ungalimi kwaye ungazami ukwenza i-look-regard - yonke le mizamo yokukhathazeka iya kukunika. Kulungile ukukhangeleka ngokusobala kwamehlo akhe, ukumomotheka ngokukhawuleza ukuba unobani, zama ukukhanya ngakumbi kunye nolonwabo ngakumbi ngeli xesha. Mphosele kancinci: "Sawubona!" Kwaye, ngaphandle kokulinda impendulo, qhubela phambili, ukhanyisa onke amaninzi afanayo. Siyaqiniseka ukuba uya kuthinteka kakhulu ngempendulo yakho. Mhlawumbi uya kumela, njengokungathi uyamangalisa, kwaye akukhathalele. Kwaye omnye umsebenzi wakho awuyi kubuya ngasiphi na indlela, njengokungathi awukuthandi ukubona indlela oyenze kuyo ngokuziphatha okungavamile kuye. Makube ngcono ukuba umntu ovela kubahlobo bakho ajika, nangona kungcono ukuba angenzi oku.

Eyona nto imnandi kakhulu yempindezelo xa, phambi kweso sitshatileyo, ufunda ukuba unomona, ukuba uyazisola ngokuba wakwenza uhlupheke. Kwaye oku kungenziwa kuphela ngenye indlela. Zifumana omnye umntu. Yaye uzame ukuyenza ibe mnandi ngakumbi kunaphambili. Kumele kube yinto epholileyo (ngokubhekiselele kwiingcamango zolutsha lolutsha), kulungile kakhulu ukuba ngubani owakhuphayo, uyazi malunga negunya lomfana omtsha. Kwaye kuntle kakhulu ukuba amantombazana asekuhlaleni kwakhe omtsha aya kuphinda awele umkhonto wakho, kwaye ngokukhawuleza uyabonelela uvuyo lwakho.

Ngamanye amaxesha, ukuze ukwanelise impindezelo, umntu makenze into ecocekileyo neyihlazo. Nangona siqinisekile ukuba ezinjalo ezincinci - oku akuwona umsebenzi kumfazi wangempela. Kodwa ukuba uziva ukuba ngaphandle kwalokhu awukwazi ukuyeka ukuhamba kwimeko kwaye uqhubeke uhlala kuyo ngosuku nangemini-kakuhle, uzama ukwenza inkathazo encinane. Umzekelo, unike izipho kubahlobo bakhe, abavela kubo. Ewe, ukuba iingubo zindleko okanye ubuncwane. Kule meko, umhlobo unokukwazi kunye nentombi yakho yangaphambili ithi uya kuwulahleka, kodwa watshintsha ingqondo yakho waza wanika yona. Ngaloo ndlela, uya kumbonisa ukuba awukhathalele ngaye kunye nazo zonke izipho zakhe.

Kwaye, ngokuqhelekileyo, into efanelekileyo kukuba ungayivumeli intliziyo yakho. Oluvakalelo luyakwenza ube ngumntu ongenamdla, uthathe ingqondo, ucinge. Uza kuhlala kwixesha elidlulileyo, ukulahlekelwa okwangoku, ukuze wenze loo nto ingalunganga. Kodwa ngubani ongazi ukuba ububi buhlala bubuyela kuye owenzayo.

Kufuneka ukwazi ukulibala malunga nexesha elidlulileyo kunye nalabo bantu bakulimazayo. Abantu abanjalo abayithinteli isiqwenga sememori yakho, intliziyo yakho. Ukukhulula umoni-kwaye uye kwikamva eqaqambileyo yothando nothando.