Ukutshata emva kweminyaka engama-30: ubuhle kunye nokungahleleki

Elizweni lethu kukho uluvo lokuba nayiphi na ibhinqa eliye lahluleka ngenxa yesinye isizathu okanye enye inokutshata ngaphambi kweminyaka engamashumi amathathu, kwixesha elizayo linalo ithuba lokonwaba ebomini bakhe. Kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo indawo ayifuni ukukunceda, kodwa ngokuchaseneyo, iyanciphisa imeko leyo, ihlale ibuza xa iya kutshata. Ngoko, ungumfazi kwiminyaka emithathu, owathi wamfumana omnye kuphela kwaye usuku lomtshato sele lusekwe. Nangona kunjalo, ngomtshato ngeli xesha kukho iinkalo ezithile omele wazi ngazo kwangaphambili, zombini malunga neenzuzo kunye nokungonakali.

Ukutshata emva kweminyaka engama-30: ukungaphumeleli

Xa uneminyaka yobudala, isangqa soqhagamshelwano lwabantu, kwiimeko ezininzi, kuncitshiswe kakhulu. Kwaye ukuba awuzange ube yindlela ebomini yobomi, ke ngeli xesha, akunakwenzeka ukuba umntu uya kuba khona, ngaphandle kweentombi kunye nabalingane abasebenza nabo. Oku kubangela ukuba ukufumana umviwa kumlingane kuya kuba nzima nakakhulu, kwaye izikhumbuzo rhoqo ezivela kwiintsapho azivumeli ziphumle.

Ukuba unako ukucombulula iingxaki ezichazwe ngasentla, uya kuvuyiswa, akusiyo yonke impumelelo. Ngelishwa, oku akusiyo yonke into, ubunzima buqala nje, ubunzima bokuphila kwintsapho yangoku.

Okokuqala, amaqabane amaninzi eminyaka, kunzima kakhulu ukutshintshana omnye nomnye, kuba wonke umntu ujwayele ukuhlala yedwa kwaye ekude ahlale ehlanganisene kunye nemikhwa yabantu kunye nokungaphumeleli. Ngaba uya kukwazi ukuvala amehlo akho kwizinto ezidakisayo zentsapho?

Umtshato oneminyaka engamashumi amathathu uthetha ukuba abantwana base-uvas baya kukhawuleza. Oku akuthethi nje kuphela ingxaki ebuhlungu yenkqubuzana yezizukulwana, kodwa kwanokuba umdala ungumzimba wesifazane, kunzima ngakumbi ukuba athwale aze abelethe umntwana. Ngenxa yesi sizathu, umyalelo kufuneka uqale ukucwangcisa ngokukhawuleza emva komtshato.

Siletha iimpawu ezibalulekileyo zomtshato emva kweminyaka engamashumi amathathu, ngoku unokuqwalasela iimpawu zayo ezilungileyo.

Ukutshata emva kweminyaka engama-30 ubudala: izibonelelo

Kule minyaka, njengomthetho, abantu sele beyazi izinto abafuna kuzo ebomini, kunye nobudlelwane beentsapho, kwaye batshata nabo bonke uxanduva, ngokuqaphela. Kananjalo, ngokuqhelekileyo umntu sele esazi indlela yokufumana ukunganyaniseki, ungabukeli isohlwayo kwiintsilelo ezincinane - konke oku kuya kunceda ukunciphisa inani leengxabano ezinokuthi zenzeke, kwaye, ngokufanelekileyo, oku kuthetha ukuba umtshato uya kuba namandla ngakumbi.

Okubalulekayo nxalenye yezinto eziphathekayo. Ukuba iqabane lakho lingaphezulu kweminyaka engama-30 ubudala, ngoko ke kunokwenzeka ukuba sele sele inesimo esithile kuluntu, indawo yokuhlala, imoto, izithuthi. Ngaloo ndlela, ungaziphumla kwaye uvumele ukuba ujabulele ubomi. Ngeke ufanele uxoshe impumelelo ekuzameni ukulondoloza ikusasa kuwe, unako ukuhlalisa umntwana kwaye ufundise. Yaye nokuba kukho into embi eyenzekayo, ngoko akudingeki uqale ekuqaleni.

Abanye abesifazana bayakujonga ukuba kunenzuzo ukuba ngamaxesha amaninzi kwixesha elidlulileyo, le ndoda isele "yahamba" kunye ne-ion ngokwayo. Zonke iziphepho zentando kunye neemvakalelo zidlulile kwaye ngoku wena kunye nomlingane wakho nilungele ulwalamano lwentsapho. Akusekho wena, nomntu wakho akayi kusongela yakho kuphela ngenxa yeengcinga ezibuhlungu.

Ngokuqhelekileyo kumtshato onjalo, ubudlelwane bezesondo benza ngokufanelekileyo. Iqabane ngalinye sele linamava athile kunye namava, okukuvumela ukuba ujabulele ngokwakho, ngoko unokukuzisa kwelinye iqabane. Kakade, umntu akanakutsho ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba ubudlelwane obusondeleyo buya kunelisa wonke umntu, kodwa ithuba liphezulu kakhulu.

Ngaloo ndlela, umtshato emva kwemashumi mathathu unenzuzo ebonakalayo - sele unayo imiphumo ethile yomsebenzi, inqanaba lezenhlalakahle, ujabule emtshatweni kwaye unokuba ngumama obalaseleyo.

Ezinye iinkcukacha

Ngokweenkcukacha ezinikezelwe yi-European Social Survey eyenziwa ngo-2006, ubuncinane ubuncinane beshumi labasetyhini baseRussia abaphakathi kweminyaka engama-30 no-40 abazange batshata, kodwa ngo-50 ubudala inani labo liye lawela kwi-4 ekhulwini, oku kubonakala ngathi abanye abafazi Kuya kuba nzima kunzima ukugqiba kwisigxina esibalulekileyo nesibalulekileyo.