Unomntu omhle, ohlakaniphile, othakazelisayo nomtshato oqhawule! Yaye awazi ukuba uya kuba lusizi ngenxa yale meko okanye ujabule, kuba umntu oqhawulekileyo unokuthiwa okhethekileyo. Kutheni kubalulekile? Umntu onjalo emva kwamagxa akhe sele "unomlingane wangaphambili, uninzi lwemithwalo yamava, imikhwa nolwazi. Kulo phawu, umbuzo uvela: "Ngaba umtshato nomntu ohlukanisile unomso?". Siza kukuxelela ngamanxweme angaphantsi kwamanzi angabonakala ekunxibelelana nomntu onjalo, kunye nendlela yokuziphatha nomntu oqhawule umtshato.
Ukuba uyindoda enhle kakhulu, ukholelwa ukuba umntu ongcono kunomntu ongafuni, ufuna ukufumana ithuba, ngoko wenze! Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba uqale ukwenza, thola zonke iingxaki kunye neenzuzo zobudlelwane nomntu ohlukanisile.
Izinzuzo
Inzuzo yokuqala kukuba yena ungumntu okhululekileyo, naye unamava abalulekileyo kwiintsebenziswano ezinzulu. Indoda enjalo inxibelelwano entsha iyaqaphela, njengoko iqonda ngokuchanekileyo kwaye iyayazi yintoni inxaxheba awayeyithatha yona.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, amadoda aqhawule umtshato azimisela ngokupheleleyo bonke abafazi abadibana naye emva kokuqhawula umtshato, ngoko-ke sebenzisa oku kwaye ube ngcono kunokuba ngumfazi wakhe wangaphambili. Kwakhona kwaziwa ukuba amadoda ahlukanisiweyo axhatshaxayo, sebenzisa oku.
Iingxaki
Ukunxibelelana nomntu oqhawule umtshato ngokwemali yeengqondo zengqondo kunokunxulumana nokuhamba kwintsimi yezemigodi - nokuba nephutha elincinci lingabangela ukuphuka. Akukho mntu emva komtshato wokuqala ongaphumeleli uya kuthatha isigqibo ngomtshato wesibini, ngoko ungalindelanga ukuba uya kuzisa ngokukhawuleza isandla sakhe nentliziyo. Kule meko, uya kufuna ulwazi kunye nomonde, oku kuya kukunceda uqhagamshelane naye.
Umntu oqhawula umtshato udla ngokuthelekisa umfazi okhoyo kumfazi wokuqala, uthi: "Kodwa i-borsch yalungiselela i-Ira ngendlela eyahlukileyo," "Kwaye uSveta wahlamba iisokisi zam neebhulukhwe zensimbi kunye nekhati," "UTanya wayedla ukuba ndihlale nabahlobo kunye nokusela ubhiya." Yilungele ukuthelekiswa okunjalo, ungacingi ukuba unqumla ubuhlobo bakhe kunye nomfazi wakhe wangaphambili. Ngokwezibalo, isahlulo samadoda emva komtshato phakathi kweenyanga ezili-18, ukuphosa umthandi omtsha, ubuyele kwintsapho.
Indlela yokuziphatha nomntu ohlukanisile
Ngaba ufuna ukuqala ulwalamano kwaye ucinge ngomtshato onokwenzeka kunye nomntu oqhawule umtshato kwaye ngelo xesha unoyolo lonwabo? Emva koko nibuthe ulwazi oluninzi ngokunokwenzeka malunga nalo. Oku kuthathwa njengenyathelo eliphambili, kuba ulwazi luya kukuxelela ukuba luhlobo luni lomntu. Kodwa ungangeni emphefumlweni wakhe, ukumba kwixesha lakhe elidlulileyo, ubuze iqela lemibuzo eyahlukileyo, nje uxoxe nabahlobo bakhe.
Ukufunda bakhe abahlobo, unokwazi ukufunda ngokubanzi malunga nokukhetha kwakho. Unako ukuphulaphula oko abahlobo bakhe bathi ngaye. Jonga ingqalelo indlela athetha ngayo ngomfazi wakhe wangaphambili, indlela amphatha ngayo ngoku, ukuba ubuhlobo bakhe nabantwana bubani, ukuba uthetha njani nabo. Ukuqokelela iinkcukacha ezincinci kunye kunye, unokwenza umfanekiso oqhelekileyo okhethiweyo.
Ngoko awukwazi ukwenza kuphela xa unquma ukukwakha ubudlelwane nomntu ohlukanisile, kodwa nakuphi na ubudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo, kule meko unikwe umzekelo wokubonisa indlela lo mntu aziphatha ngayo emtshatweni.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, abasetyhini bakholelwa ukuba ukuba umntu uphatha kakubi malunga nomfazi wakhe wangaphambili kunye / okanye umphatha kakubi kwaye akuxelela ngokuthe ngqo, oko akuthethi nto. Lo uluvo oluphosakeleyo, ngoko ungalindelanga ukuba kuya kuba yinto ehlukileyo nawe. Ngokuqhelekileyo umntu uhlala efana.
Ingongoma ebalulekileyo yeso sizathu sokuqhawula umtshato, nokuba kwakuyinkxalabo ebudlelwaneni, kwaye akazange afune ukulwa nokugcina ubudlelwane. Ukuba kunjalo, phi na isiqinisekiso sokujamelana neengxaki ebusweni bakho, uya kulwela ulwalamano lwakho?
Kukho amaxesha amaninzi kunye namaxesha ahlukeneyo, kodwa kule meko kukho enye enye-unayo ithuba lokubona ukuziphatha komntu ngaphambi komtshato, thelekisa nokuziphatha kwakhe emva komtshato kwaye wenze izigqibo.
Ukwakha ubudlelwane, kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ngokucacileyo ukuba ukuphumelela umntu okhululekileyo kufuneka uzuze intliziyo yakhe, kodwa ukuba unqobe umntu oqhawule umtshato, kufuneka ulwe nexesha lakhe elidlulileyo, eliyinkimbinkimbi yonke inkqubo.
Kodwa ukuba unesiqinisekiso sokuba lo ngumntu oyifunayo, usigubungele ngeengcebiso zethu uze unqobe okhethiweyo!