Abantu abanqwenela ukutshata. Abantu bafuna ukutshata rhoqo. Kakade ke, malunga nabafazi. Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba umntu wamemela indebe yekhofi, kwaye loo mfazi sele esele azame ngengubo yomtshato waza wacinga amagama abantwana besikhathi esizayo. Xa ubudlelwane buqala ukuphuhlisa, kubonakala ngathi umcimbi umtshato. Kwaye! Kutheni, ngoko, wamemela ngelanga lesibini, wanikeza iintyatyambo, wabonisa indawo yakhe yokuhlala, waqulunqa ubusuku obuthandwayo, wabona ukuba loo mfazi wayilibala umlomo wakhe, waza wathi uyayikhetha ixesha elizayo? Kubonakala ngathi le ndoda inenjongo enzulu. Kodwa nantsi inyanga okanye ezimbini okanye ezintathu, kwaye ubudlelwane buphuhliswa phantse kwimeko efanayo. Ixhala liqala ukunyuka kumfazi: ngaba indoda iyayithandana ngokuvisisana nobudlelwane njengoko yayicinga? Ungayibona njani injongo yomntu?
8 iimpawu zokuthi umntu akayiyo ingxaki ngokuphathelele ubudlelwane
Isimpawu 1. Ubomi bakhe bufihliwe kwimfihlelo
Indoda leyo, iinyanga ezimbini okanye ezintathu, ikhusela ngenyameko loo nxalenye yobomi bakhe ehlala ngaphandle kobudlelwane bakho, kufuneka uqaphele. Ukuba uthe cwaka okanye uthetha ngomsebenzi wakhe, abazali bakhe, izalamane, abahlobo, kunye neengxaki ezibuhlungu malunga nemibuzo yakho malunga nayo, mhlawumbi akafuni ukwabelana ngesithuba sakhe kunye nomfazi ongeke avumele. Indoda inokuthanda ukudibana, isondo, iingxoxo ezithandanayo, iitalente zentlanzi, kodwa oku akuthethi ukuba uzimisele kangakanani.
Isibonakaliso 2. Ngaba asivelisi abantu abahlobo abasondeleyo
Kwiintsebenziswano nezicwangciso ezide, umntu uzama ukulibaziseka "nabafazi bamanzi". Ukuzisa umfazi kwisangqa sabathandekayo, ufuna ukubonisa intanda yakhe, fumana imvume kubantu abangenandaba naye kwaye abonise ubungqina bentliziyo yakhe. Ukuba umntu wakho akangxamanga ukuxelela intsapho yakhe kunye nabahlobo bakho ngobomi bakhe, kunye nezicelo zakho ukuhlangabezana nezihlobo zakhe ziphendule ngokukhawuleza kwaye zondla izithembiso, cinga ngako. Mhlawumbi uyakwenza ngenxa yokuba eneentloni ngobudlelwane bakho okanye unesizathu esihle sokungabhengezi into enayo ebomini bakhe. Kule meko, akanakucinga kakhulu kuwe.
Isimpawu 3. Akukho ukuphikelela kulwalamano
Indoda engathandiyo kwaye ayihlose ukwakha ubudlelwane obunzulu, ivumela ukuba ayikhohlwe ukubiza, ayikwazi ukuhamba ngomhla, okanye, ingabi ngokuzikhethela, ukungahoywa intlanganiso kunye nawe ngexesha lokuzonwabisa kunye nabahlobo. Naluphi na ukukhathazeka okuphazamisa lwakho ukhethiweyo kuwe kuya kubonakala kungabalulekanga, kodwa kwi-priority priority. Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba nethemba lokusebenzisana kwasekuqaleni kunye kunye nabasetyenziselwe njengendawo yokuhamba okanye "indawo yokuzimela"? Ukuba umntu ubonakala ebomini bakho kuphela xa ekhululekile, musa ukugcina ingcinga kwaye ungachithi ixesha kuye onokuzinikezela kumntu ofanelwe nguye.
Isimpawu 4. Akunandaba okanye ufuna ukukunceda
Umanyano wabantu ababini abanothando kusekelwe ekuxhaseni, inkxaso, ukunakekelwa. Esi sisiseko sokwakha intsapho epheleleyo. Ukuba indoda yakho ethandekayo ingenomdla kwiingxaki zakho zemihla ngemihla neentsuku zonke, iyalala xa ucela ukuba ancede kwaye ungatyi ukuchitha ixesha lakhe ekupheliseni ubunzima bakho - uphawu lokungakhathaleli lubonakala. Ingcamango yakhe icacile: kutheni uchithe uhambo lwengqondo, umzimba kunye nezinto eziphathekayo kumfazi ophethe "ukuhamba" okanye ubudlelwane bokulala? Ukuba oku kwacaca kuwe, qha ga mshelana.
Isibonakaliso 5. Sindisa kwibhinqa kwaye ayincedisi ngemali
Amadoda amaninzi ayaqaphela ukubaluleka kwawo kunye neemfuno ngoncedo oluphathekayo kunye nokuthatha inxaxheba ebomini yowesifazane. Ngenxa yobuchule babo, bathatha uxanduva malunga necandelo lezemali lolwalamano. Ukuba indoda yakho ebubudlelwaneni yenza indawo apho - "sisebenzisa imali yakho kuqala, kwaye ke ngamnye wethu", akaze abe nemali yezipho, kwaye, ngokubanzi, uthanda ukuhlala ngeendleko zakho, ungalindelanga ukuba oku okwethutyana, kwaye ukuba xa kukho ubudlelwane obunzulu, ngoko uya kuba noxanduva lwezemali. Ngeke. Uya kuba nawe xa nje unemali, okanye ade afumane enye apho ungasindisa khona ngaphezulu.
Isimpawu 6. Asinomdla kwimbono yowesifazane
Bonke abantu bazibona bezimeleyo, bengadingi imiyalelo nemiyalelo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, kufuneka ukuba kunjalo, ngakumbi kwizigqibo zesintu. Kodwa ke apha amadoda ayadinga inkxaso kunye neengcebiso ezingenakulungeleka, ezakhayo, nangona igama lokugcina ligcinwe njalo. Imiba yezindlu kunye neentsapho, imicimbi kunye neengxaki kufuneka zithunyelwe kwingxoxo edibeneyo, kuba ubudlelwane babini buhlala kwenye. Ukuba umntu oceba naye ukwakha intsapho akayi kubuza uluvo lwakho, uyayigatya izigqibo ezibalulekileyo ubuhlobo bakho okanye uxinzelele ngantoni na ukuzama ukuveza ibonongo yakho, ungacingi ukuba udibanise nobomi. Akayithandanga ngokupheleleyo imbono yakho, kwaye ngenxa yoko, wena ngokwakho awumeleli ixabiso elikhethekileyo.
Isibonakaliso 7. Sibonisa ukuthungatha kunye nokubanda ebantwini
Amadoda acwangciswa ngokwemvelo ukuba baqaphele ngokugqithiseleyo ukuba umfazi othandekayo ube yinqaba ngandlela-thile. Apha, bathi, khangela, yintoni "umzingeli" onobuqili, ndiyiphi into ebalulekileyo "yokubamba" ndiyibambelele kwiintanethi zam. Uya kubonisa indlela enokwenzeka ngayo ingqalelo yakhe, inzala kunye neentlonipho, ngakumbi phambi kwabantu ababaluleke kakhulu kuye. Ukuba iqabane lakho kwiindawo zoluntu liyakugwema ukuthatha ngesandla, ukukhawuleza okanye ukuthetha, kufuneka ucinge ngento efanelekileyo yokuyihoxisa. Ngaba uyakuthanda? Okanye uyakuthanda, kodwa akunjalo wena, ukwesaba ukukhutshwa? Okanye unamahloni ngawe kunye nolwalamano lwakho, yingako uloyiko lokuba abo bajikelezileyo baya kukhankanya isimo sakhe sengqondo esichaphazelayo, into engekho kwaye ayikwazi.
Isibonakaliso 8. Asenzi izicwangciso zexesha elizayo kunye kwaye akathethi ngabantwana
Indoda enzulu eneenjongo ezinzulu ayifuni ukuchitha ixesha lakhe ngobuhlobo obungento. Ufuna ukuqonda kakade kwizigaba zokuqala zobudlelwane, ukuba udibana ngqo naloo mfazi onemilinganiselo efana neentsapho, unomnqweno wokuba nezingane kunye nekamva elifanayo. Indoda iya kubakhokelela ekuncokola ezo zinto ukuze zifumane ezi zihlandlo ezibalulekileyo. Ukuba ukhetho lwakho aluyiyo into engayiphakamisi esi sihloko, kodwa nayo yonke into enokuthi igweme iqhinga lakho lokuqonda iingxaki, unokuqiniseka ukuba yena okanye awunomdla kuyo, okanye akanalo nantoni na, kuba unezinye izicwangciso zobomi.