Ukulungiselela umtshato kudinga ukuqwalasela amaninzi amanqaku angabandakanyi kuphela kwiinkqubo zentlangano okanye ukukhethwa kwezigqoko, iivenkile kunye nesitayela esiza kwenzeka kuyo. Ingongoma ebalulekileyo kukucwangcisa indawo yokuhlala. Apha kufuneka uqwalasele izinto ezinjengeeminyaka zeendwendwe, ziqhelana okanye zingaboni, kwaye zibaluleke kakhulu - zinabantwana. Umtshato ubonisa ukuba abantu abaphambili bolu bhiyozo ngabo bahloniphekileyo into eyenzekayo. Nangona kunjalo, ubukho babantwana phakathi kweendwendwe banokulungiswa ngokucophelela ukuba zibe yintsebenzo yasekuseni yabantwana.
Kucacile ukuba wonke umzali ukholelwa ukuba into ephambili ngumnqweno womntwana wabo, kodwa oku akusoloko ifanelekileyo kwaye ayisoloko inomdla kubantu abakujikelezayo. Ngoko ke, kukho iimeko ezininzi ezinokwenzeka ukuba abantwana bangaba phakathi kweendwendwe. Okokuqala, kunokwenzeka ukuthumela isimemo kwangaphambili, apho kuya kuqatshelwa ukuba idibano kufuneka ihambe ngaphandle kwabantwana, ngokukodwa kwiindawo zokutyela ezininzi, enye yeemeko zokuyalela iigqabi. Ukuba ubukho babantwana abuyiyo ingxaki, unokuzibandakanya ngokwahlukileyo kubo okanye uqeshe amacengeza aya kuhlala kwiindwendwe ezincinci. Ukongezelela, unokubandakanya abantwana ngqo kwinkqubo yokubhiyozela. Nangona kunjalo, ubudala bomntwana kufuneka buqwalaselwe. Kuya kuba nzima ukuba umntwana afike kunyaka, akayi kukhwelisa kuphela, kodwa akayi kunika ukuphumla okuhle kwaye ahlekise abazali.
Ngoko, ukuba kunqunywe ukuba abantwana baya kuthatha inxaxheba kwimibhiyozo okanye kwezinye iindawo zazo, kufuneka baxwayiswe ngale nto. Emva koko, ukuba bayazi ukuba ziindwendwe ezamkelekileyo, kubo, umtshato womntu uya kuba yinto ebalulekileyo ekulindelekileyo, apho baya kulungiswa ngokucophelela. Abantwana banokubamba iqhaza kulo mbhiyozo ngokuthi "abafazi". Unokucela amantombazana ukuba "aphendule" kwiibhasikiti kunye neepasta zama rose. Kwaye abafana bayayenza imisebenzi yomqhubi, ophethe isitimela sokugqoka umtshakazi ngexesha lo mthendeleko, kwaye le nkwenkwe iyakwazi ukubamba isiqwenga somtshakazi okanye umkhonto ngamasongo. Into kuphela engayi kuyilibala, nangona kunjalo, kuyimfuneko yokuxoxa ngeendima ezinikezelwa abantwana nabazali babo.
Into ephambili eyofunekayo ekulungiseleleni abantwana kukukhetha impahla efanelekileyo. Ukuze ufumane inkambiso yentombazana kubalulekile ukunyamekela ngaphezu kweevenkile enye, ixesha elifanelekileyo ixesha elininzi linikezela ngezinye iimfuno. Kodwa kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba ingubo ayifanele ibe yindoda enhle, kodwa ikhululekile, kuba umntwana ngumntwana. Emva kokuba "inxaxheba ebalulekileyo" iya kwenziwa, umntwana uya kufuneka asebenze aze adlale, ngaphandle kokufumana nayiphi na ingxaki evela kwiingubo zokukhanya. Ukukhethwa kweengubo okanye iingubo kwintombazana, kuyinqweneleka ukuyeka ukhetho lwakho kumbala okhanyayo, kungenjalo i-burgundy okanye iingubo eziluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka ayiyi kubonakala ihambelana nesambatho somtshakazi. Kunengqiqo ukubonisana nokuguqula ngaphambi kokukhetha ingubo yakhe. Kungenzeka ukuba umtshato uya kuba ngumxholo okanye ukuba ukubhiyozelwa kuya kugcinwa kumbala othile webala, ngoko kuya kufuneka uhambelane. Kwakhona kunokwenzeka ukuba izambatho zezingane ziya kunikwa ngabaququzeleli bembhiyozo.
Kule nto, lungiselela inkwenkwe kulula, kuba kuye kwanele ukhetho olufanelekileyo, izicathulo, intambo yomnsalo kunye nomntu omncinci ulungele!
Akuyimfuneko ukukhankanya ukuba loo nto yabantwana abaselula ayithengi ukukhula, kuba kuyimfuneko yokuba kubekho umthendeleko othile, kwaye abantwana bakhula ngokukhawuleza kwaye abanakwenzeka ukuba banokutshisa kwinto efanayo kwinyanga okanye ezintandathu emva kweenyanga.
Nangona kunjalo, abantwana njengendwendwe banokuba baninzi kakhulu okanye bazingenanga kulo mbhiyozo, kulo mzekelo, khetha loo nto iya kuba lula. Kodwa konke okufanayo akuyimfuneko ukukhawulelwa kwijee kunye nekhoftotkami, vumela isifuba naluphi na imeko uziva luyingxenye yesiganeko.
Umbuzo wokuthenga impahla efanelekileyo yintsana ihambelana nenkinga enjengokutshitshiswa kwayo. Inzuzo ngoku kukho ubuninzi beevenkile, kubandakanyeka kwi-intanethi ngokubonelela nge-intanethi yezityezelo zezingane zeeholide ezihlukeneyo zexabiso. Kwakhona, njengendlela yokukhetha, iinkonzo zeevenkile zokukhangela ezifanelekileyo zifanele zilahlwe.
Kwimeko nayiphi na into, into ephambili ekufuneka ikhunjulwe - ubukho babantwana kwinani leendwendwe kufuna iimfuneko ezongezelelweyo, ukwenzela ukuba iindwendwe kunye neendwendwe ziyaneliswa ngumbhiyozo.