Mhlawumbi, sonke siyazi igama elithi "ukuthandana nothando ukuzonda inyathelo elinye". Ngokuqinisekileyo, kungekhona isayensi, kodwa kungenxa yesizwe, kodwa nangona kunjalo, phantse elowo wethu uvumelana naye, okanye udibanise nezenzo zakhe kumava akhe. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, lesi saga sifanele sichaze ngakumbi kunokusidibanisa, kodwa sichaphazela ngokuthe ngqo: kuhamba njani? Ngako oko kuvela njani? Kutheni kutshintsho okunjalo kulula ukusuka kwimeko echaseneyo kwiingcamango ezisisiseko? Ngaba oku akubonisi ukuba ahluke kakhulu? Ngamnye wethu ubeka izigqibo zethu ngokuthandana nothando. Kodwa ngokuwahlula kwiinqanaba, sinokuqonda ngokucacileyo indawo yethu kwaye sinqume ukuba zinjani iimvakalelo ezifanayo, okanye ngokuchasene nazo ziyahlukana.
Okokuqala, makhe sijonge kwiinqanaba zothando. Isigaba sokuqala, ke, uthando. Eli nqanaba ngokwalo lingahlukana ngamanye amaninzi, achanekileyo kwaye aphumelele, kodwa oku akuyona into ebalulekileyo. Kubalulekile ukwazi isicaciso sale nqanaba, eyaziwa phantse bonke abantu abaye babethandana, kuba le nqanaba elowo wonke umntu ufumana. Eli lixesha elifanelekileyo leemvakalelo eziphakamileyo, umnqweno kunye nomdla. Awukucingeli malunga nokungahambi kweqabane, jonga yonke into ngokusebenzisa iilazi ezinemibala enemibala kunye nesigqubuthelo se-maximimalism kunye neengcinga. Le yithuba elithandana kakhulu nelithandekayo xa umzimba wethu ukhiqiza i-hormone eyenza intliziyo yethu ibetha ngokukhawuleza, incumo eninzi kwaye iyonwabile. Eli lixesha apho isibini esingazi ngayo iingxaki nobomi. Isigaba sifutshane kodwa sibalulekile.
Isigaba sesibini lixesha nje kuphela apho iingxabano, iingcambu ezimbi, ubomi bemihla ngemihla ziqala ukuzibonakalisa. Eyona nto ibuthathaka kunye nobunzima bazo zonke izigaba, kuba ngoku okwenene isibini sibona uvavanyo lwangempela luthando. Abalingani, ngoko, jonga ukuba ngaba bafana njani kweli nqanaba. Ngoko ukuthetha, yonke into ibonakalisa xa kukho ukudabuka kunye nobomi, kodwa kungekhona ukulangazelela nokuzonwabisa. Ukuba ngaba isibini sihlangene namava kwaye sidlulela kweli nqanaba, okwesithathu kuza - ukuvisisana ngokupheleleyo kwemiphefumlo kunye nomsa. Ngoku i-hormone iqala ukuhlakulela, kungekhona uthando nothando, kodwa isisa kunye nothando. Esi sibini sivakalelwa ngokwenene, sinceda omnye nomnye, sisekela kwaye siyaqonda. Kuza ukuvumelanisa kwaye into enokuthiwa yintando. Abantu baqonda kwaye bathandana ngokupheleleyo, nayo yonke imikhwa kunye neengxaki, bafunde kwaye bahlonelane, bacwangcise ikusasa kwaye bachithe ixesha langoku. Bajonga kwelinye icala, baze bahambe ebomini, bebambe izandla, eduze kweenjongo zabo. Leli nqanaba lokugqibela lothando.
Ukuba ubonisa izigaba zenzondo, ngoko kukho iintlobo ezimbini zezigaba - inzondo emva komthando, okanye lowo ozayo emva kokumazi. Ukuba ufumanisa izigaba eziqhelekileyo, ngokokuqala oko kuya kubakho ukucaphukisa okanye ukuziphatha kakubi. Uziva ucaphukile xa ubona okanye uva lo mntu, unomdla xa usebenzisana naye kwaye konke oku akubi kakhulu kuwe. Unciphisa umnxeba naye kunye nemvakalelo engathandekiyo malunga nalo mntu uqala ukuphuhlisa kuphela, kwaye ihlala iphazamise ngakumbi, ibuhlungu ngakumbi ...
Isigaba sesibini xa ukupheka kufinyelela kumda, kwaye ngokwenene uqala ukuva ukuba uyamthiya lo mntu, kwaye wena ngokwakho uyazi ukuba oku. Kodwa kuyafuneka ukuba uqaphele ukuba izigaba zenzondo, ngokungafani nezigaba zothando, zixhamle kwaye zichanekile, kuba inzondo yinto evakalelwa ngabanye kumntu ngamnye, kwaye izigaba zayo ziyahlukahluka kwiimbambiso kunye nohlobo lobudlelwane obandulela inzondo, umntu ngokwakhe, imeko. Ungamthiya umntu owake wamthanda, kodwa wadimazeka kuye, waziva ehlukileyo, kwaye waqala ukukucaphukisa, kwaye emva kwexesha, kwavela iingxabano ezinkulu. Kwakhona, inzondo inokufika ngokukhawuleza kumntu onecala phambi kwakho, okanye into enomsindo, yatshintsha okanye yahluleka. Inzondo inokumiselwa ekuzalweni, umzekelo, xa kukho abantu abaneentshaba okanye iintsapho, ngoko asikwazi ukuhlala sithetha ngenzondo njengengqondo ezayo kwizigaba.
Akunabo bonke abantu abanokufumana uluthando lokwenene, njengenzondo, ukuhamba kuzo zonke izigaba. Ukuze ukwazi uthando lomnye umntu, kufuneka uqale wazi ngokwakho, uzilungise kwaye uzame ukwazi omnye umntu, ufunde uthando, njengobugcisa. Sifunda olu buchule ukususela ebuntwaneni, xa samukeliswa uthando lwabazali size sidibane nomfana okanye intombazana ebusheni. Uthando, ngokungafani nenzondo, luhle, kwaye lubugcisa obuphezulu bokusebenzisana nomntu. Ngokwenzululwazi, unokwandisa izigaba zothando, unikezwe indlela esiyifunda ngayo ukuyiqonda, siyahlukana kwaye siphumelele impumelelo. Ayikuvela kwi-first glance, okanye ngokukhawuleza evela kwindawo ethile ebonakalayo - kuthatha ixesha ukuhamba kwiinqanaba ezithile kwaye, ngenxa yoko, ukufumana isigxina kwiindawo zabemi babini, ukubanika ulonwabo, uxolo, amandla kunye nenkxaso.