Enyanisweni, yintoni enye indlela engcono kakhulu yokwenza oku ukuze ufumane ngegazi elincane?
Kufuneka uqaphele ngokukhawuleza ukuba kungcono ukuba ungaqalisi ubudlelwane obakhelwe ngobubele. Ewe, kuyabuhlungu ukujonga umntu obulawa ngokwenene ngenxa yakho, kwaye awukwazi ukumnika nto ngokubuyisela. Kodwa, kunjalo, kungcono ukumvumela ukuba ahambe kanye kanye.
Ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kuba bubuhlungu kwaye bubi kuye, kodwa, kholwani mna, ngoko yonke into iya kuba yimbi. Imiba xa intombazana ekugqibeleni iwa thandana, yinto ehlukile kwimithetho. Ngokuqhelekileyo, ongathandekiyo nje uqala ukumcaphukisa, ukuhlambalaza, ukuhlukumeza kunye nokwahlukana, emva koko lowo mfana uyaqiniseka ukuba bonke abafazi bastards abayifanele ukuba babe nolwalamano oluhle. Ngaba ngokwenene ufuna ukuba isenzo sakho sokuqala siphendule.
Kodwa ukuba sele usenzile loo mpazamo, kufuneka wenze ngokukhawuleza malunga nento. Qonda, umntu ohlala naye, qiniseka ukuba uya kukwazi ukunqoba kwaye anqobe. Wenza konke okusemandleni kwaye akanakwenzeka, engaqapheli ukuba awukwazi ukunyanzeliswa ngamandla. Emva kokuhlukana, ngokuqinisekileyo, uya kukhumbula ngokukrakra indlela achithe ngayo kwizinto eziphathekayo kunye nokomoya. Kule nto, nokuba akufanelekile ukukhubeka, kuba kubuhlungu kakhulu kwaye, ngendlela eyona nto ithetha, xa umntu enikezwa ithemba lokungenakwenzeka.
Ngoko, uthi: Andiyithandi umntu, kodwa ndidibana naye. Yintoni endiyenzayo? Kuyimfuneko ukuhlula olu lwalamano. Kwaye, ngokukhawuleza kunokwenzeka. Ukuba umntu uyakuthanda kakhulu, unokufikelela kwisibonelelo sesandla nentliziyo. Kwaye ke intlekele yangempela iya kudlalwa.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, lo mntu sele engaziwa kuni, uyasetyenziswa kuwo kwaye, mhlawumbi, inxalenye yakho ayifuni ukumvumela ukuba ahambe. Musa ukuzingca. Ngokukhawuleza okanye emva koko uya kudibana nothando lokwenene kwaye ulilahle ngaphandle kokungabaza, ukuhlazisa nokunyathela isidima somntu. Ngoko cinga ngako kwaye uzame ukusombulula yonke into ngokuzithoba kunye nentando yenkululeko.
Akunakuze uphelelwe, musa ukushiya ifowuni kwaye ungabhubhisi. Umntu kufuneka aqonde isizathu esiyinyani, kwaye ungangeni nezizathu zokuzithethelela uze ufune ithuba lokudibanisa. Ngoko ke, kufuneka uxoxe ngokuthula. Incoko, yebo, kufuneka ibe yintsimbi-tete. Akunjalo nawuphi na ukuguqulwa kwintsebenzo kawonkewonke. Oku kuya kumcaphukisa umntu omncinane aze amthobise. Kufuneka uzame ukumchazela yonke imeko, xelela ngeemvakalelo zakho ngaye. Awudingi ukusho izitampu ezifana: "akusiwe, kodwa mna", "kwenzeka nje", "funda ukuhlala ngaphandle kwam, kuya kuba ngcono". Yitsho bhetele into oyiva ngayo nendlela ujonga ngayo le meko. Inyaniso yokwenene isoloko ilungileyo kunamanga amahle. Ngokuqinisekileyo, uya kubuhlungu kakhulu, kodwa ubuncinci uya kuziva ukuba ubuncinane uyamhlonela umntu.
Emva kwesi ncoko, vumela lo mfana acace ngokucacileyo kwaye acacise ngokucacileyo ukuba akuyi kuphinda kuhlaziywe ubudlelwane, ukuze angenzi. Musa ukunyamekela izicelo zakhe, kwaye mhlawumbi, iinyembezi. Kubuhlungu kwaye bunzima kakhulu, kodwa kuya kuba ngcono.
Ukuba uqala ukubhala, fowuna uze uphendule iintlanganiso, ungamncedi uze umphephe. Emva kwexesha, le ncinane iya kuqonda yonke into ize ihlalise. Ndikholelwe, ngelinye ilanga uya kukubulela ngalo msebenzi. Ayikho into engathandekiyo kunomfana onokuthi intombazana yakhe icinga ngayo: "Andiyithandi umfana, kodwa ndidibana ...". Kwaye uyazibuza rhoqo: "Yintoni endiyenzayo?".
Kodwa kukho ubudlelwane ngaphandle koluthando oluvela kwintombazana, xa indoda ibambelela ngamandla. Ngelishwa, kukho abafana abathi, ngenxa yobuthakathaka babo nobunzima babo, basebenzise ukwesaba kwabasetyhini kunye namandla abo. Indoda enjalo, okungekho umntu ongenakubizwa ngaye, usebenzisa ubukhulu bayo.
Ukuba loo mntu uhlala esongela, uyatshitshisa okanye aze ahlabe, ke akukho ncokola ayiyi kunceda. Abantu abanjalo abanengqondo. Ziyakwazi ukumiswa kuphela ngamandla kunye nehlazo. Ukuba uyaqonda ukuba awukwazi ukujamelana nayo, qi niseka ukuba ucele uncedo. Abanye abafazi banentloni ukuvuma ukuba bahlala okanye badibana ne-monster. Oku kuziphatha bubudenge obukhulu. Abahlobo kunye nentsapho yangempela abayi kuze bagwebe. Kunoko, baya kwenza konke ukukunceda.
Ukuba umntu osemfana usongela ukuba akayi kukuvumela ukuba uhambe, kuyafaneleka ukuzama ukuthetha naye phambi koyihlo, umzalwana okanye abahlobo. Ndikholelwe, ngenxa yezinto ezinjalo, amandla angamadoda yinto enamandla kakhulu. Akunakuchukumisi ukuba asongele kwaye afune ukuba abantu bakho abasondeleyo bayichaze ngokucacileyo oko kuya kwenzeka kuye xa ulahlekelwa ubuncinane ubunwele. Khumbula ukuba aba bantu basenobuthakathaka kwaye banqabiseko. Uyabamba kuphela ngenxa yokuba uyaqiniseka: akafuni omnye umntu. Lowo ummeli wesilisa unako ukuphakamisa isandla sakhe kuphela kwintombazana, kuba ubuthathaka kwaye akanako ukutshintsha. Ngaphambi kwamadoda okwenene ahlala eqinisa umsila aze avumelane nayo yonke into echaziweyo.
Musa ukuzithuthuma uze uqhubeke uphila kumntu onjalo. Kwaye nangona kunjalo, ungaze uzwele ngaye. Yena ngokwakhe ubeka isohlwayo ngenxa yobuthakathaka kangaka, kwaye awuyikusola into. Nangona ucela ukuxolelwa emva kokulahla kunye nokubetha, nokuba uthetha izimbali kunye nezipho - zibaleke. Unyaka wonke, imeko iya kuba yimbi ngakumbi. Kungcono ukumisa yonke into ngaphambi kokuba abe ngumyeni wakho, kwaye kuza kuba ngabantwana. Emva koko yonke into iya kuba nzima kwaye umntwana uya kuba neentlungu.
Uthando luvakalelwa lunye, luqhayisa kwaye luvuyayo. Ukuba awukwazi ukuchaza ukuba kwenzekani phakathi kwakho kunye nenkwenkwe yakho nayiphi na yale miqondiso, ngoko akukho nto ithetha ngayo kulwalamano olunjalo. Wonke umntu unelungelo lokufumana uvuyo, ngoko ke kukufanelekile ukuba sicinge ukuba ubuhlobo obunjalo bungabangela uvuyo. Ngelishwa, oku akunakwenzeka. Ngoko ke, umntu akanakuze abe kunye nomntu onesihawu, uvelwano, nangakumbi nangenxa yokoyika. Ngoko yenza izigqibo uze uqalise ubomi obutsha, apho ubudlelwane buya kukhiwa ngothando.