Inxalenye ethile yembali.
Kwiminyaka engama-70 e-United States kwakukho inhlangano yabangengabo Abazali, abaye bazisa igama elithi "Childfree". I-Childfree ithetha inkululeko kubantwana. Kukholelwa ukuba le nkcazo yenziwe njengento engalinganiyo "engenamntwana" kwaye ihloselwe ukugxininisa ukukhetha okukhululekileyo, kunokuba kuphazamisekile kunye nokutshabalalisa.
Eli gama laziwa ngokugqithiseleyo ekupheleni kwekhulu leminyaka elidlulileyo, xa iqela lokuqala labantu abalandela kule ndlela yobomi lwakhiwa.
Okumangalisayo kukuba, abantu abangaqhelekanga ngokweziko bendabuko phakathi kwabameli be-Childfree bancinci. Ngokuqhelekileyo abantu ngabanye abantu okanye izibini ezithandayo ngokuzithandela ukuba ziqhubeke nelo hlobo.
Bangobani aba bantu?
Kuze kube ngoku, kwihlabathi apho abaninzi abantu bafuna ukuba ngabazali, abantu abangenabantwana, kunoko, ukuphambuka, kungekhona isigqirha. Nangona kunjalo, ukhetho ekuthandweni kobomi ngaphandle kobantwana, musa ukugwenxa, ukuxhatshaza okanye ukuphosa.
Abanye "abangenakho abantwana" bakholelwa ukuba kukuziphatha okubi ukuzala abantwana, kuba oku kwenziwa ngaphandle kwemvume yabantwana kwaye okokuqala ugonyamelo. Ukhetho lwabo lunokucaciswa kukuba ihlabathi lethu aliyona indawo efanelekileyo yokuhlala ngokuzonwabisa, kukho iingozi ezininzi kunye nentlungu, ubunzima bezinto eziphilayo, izifo ezininzi.
Abanye bachaza ukhetho lwabo ngokungakwazi kwabo kuba ngabazali abalungileyo , ukungafuni ukuzincama ubomi kunye nokuthuthuzela ngenxa yomnye umntu.
Iingcali zengqondo zikholelwa ukuba abaninzi ababizwa ngokuba ngabantwana abangenayo abantwana okanye baye baba neengxaki kubazali okanye nabanye abantu abadala abathintele ukhetho lwabo, mhlawumbi babebaxhoba lobundlobongela, okanye banomntwana kwaye banomdla. Abanye bavele bengakwazi ukufumana abantwana babo.
Nangona umfanekiso ozama ukudala "umntwana ongekho mntwana" ngokuzodwa, umfanekiso womntu onomsebenzi ophumelelayo, oqhelekileyo ngandlela-thile ngandlela-thile abantu abangaphumeleliyo bathunjwa ngenxa yokwesaba okanye ubunzima. Okufanayo, okukhethiweyo ngenxa yezizathu ezifanelekileyo, ukuqonda kunye neengxaki ezikhoyo, iiyunithi.
Kungatsholwa ukuba ininzi "engabonwanga ngumntwana" yenza okukhethiweyo ngokungakhethi, nangona ipropaganda yecala.
Ngaba kubi okanye kulungile?
Ukufikelela kokuvavanywa kwesi siqalo ukusuka kwindawo yokujonga "okulungileyo okanye embi" akufanelekanga. Kukho nawuphi na, oku kukhetho lomntu olwenziwe nguye. Kwaye akunandaba nokuba zeziphi izizathu ezibangelwa kulolu khetho.
Ukususela kwindawo yokujonga inzululwazi, inkolo kunye nezopolitiko, "ukungabikho umntwana" ibhallast engenamsebenzi engenzi umsebenzi oyisisiseko - ukuqhubela phambili kwelo hlobo. Ukususela kumbono weembono zanamhlanje, ngamnye wethu unelungelo lokugqiba indlela yokuphila, bangaphi abantwana ukuba babe kunye nokuba banakho na.
Kuyaziwa ukuba abantu abaninzi abaye baphoswa ngexesha lokuzalwa komntwana, bazisole. Akukho mntu unokukwazi ukuxela ukuphendulwa kokungenamntwana kwixesha elizayo. Omnye uya kuhlala enelisekile kule meko yemicimbi, umntu uya kuzihlambalaza ngenxa yokuba ebusheni bakhe wayenombono ongalunganga ebomini.
Uninzi lwabantu abangafuni ukuzalwa kunye nemfundo yabantwana, zama ukuphuhlisa, ukwenza umsebenzi ophumelelayo, musa ukuma. Oku kuyancomeka, kodwa ngelo xesha, akukho manani aqinisekisa inani elikhulu labantu abanobulumko, abaphumelelayo phakathi kwabangenawo abantwana. Njengoko umkhuba ubonisa, ubukho bembewu abuphazamisi ukuphunyezwa, kwaye kwezinye iimeko, kuncedisa ekuphunyezweni kweenjongo eziphakamileyo, kuba abantwana banomdla wokuphuhlisa.
Kukho nawuphi na, akukho mntu unelungelo lokugweba abantu abaye banquma ukuyeka ulonwabo lokuba ngabazali, kunye nalabo abakhetha ukuba ngabanye kuphela kwaye banqaba nayiphi na inzuzo. Ingaba iimbono zale ntshukumo eyaziwayo ziphosakeleyo, okanye kungekhona-ixesha liya kubonakala.
Ngo-2003, izibalo zase-United States zabonisa ukuba abafazi abangenamntwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka engama-45 babengaphezu kwama-44%. Inani labantwana abangabantwana abangakhuliyo likhula minyaka yonke.