Ubudlelwane ngaphandle kwemithwalo - o, yeka indlela okuthakazelisayo nokuzonwabisa ngayo! Kodwa makhe sihlole, ngaba, umzekelo, ukulungele wena? Ngaba awuzange ucinge ngako? Mhlawumbi kufanelekile ukucinga?
Ukwabelana ngesondo ngohlobo. Ngokwesondo. Akunandaba nokuba kubizwa ntoni, kubalulekile ukuba abanye abantu bayisebenzise, kwaye baphumelele ngokubanzi. Kodwa ngaba kuyinto evamile, ukuba ubomi bomntu abuhambi ngaphaya kombhede? Yaye kungekhona kwimbono yombono woluntu, kodwa yintuthuzelo yakhe. Kuyamkeleka njani ukuba umfazi ohlakaniphile kunye nosuku ukuba abe nolwalamano olusenyameni kunye nendoda?
Masiqale ngombuzo wokugqibela. Ubundlobongela ngenxa yesondo lukhona kwindalo, oko kuthetha ukuba umntu ufuna ewe. Ngokuchanekileyo, kubaluleke kakhulu kubantu abaninzi abahlukeneyo kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo zobomi. Ukusuka kuye, abafazi bathanda abafazi, bagxile emsebenzini nasemisebenzini, abangenayo indawo yokuthatha ixesha lokuya kuma-movie kunye nokutya kweCawa kunye nomama (oko kukuthi, ubudlelwane). Musa ukucinga, kwaye abo baqinisekile ukuba isondo kuphela into efanelekileyo kumntu othile. Amantombazana abakholelwa ukuba ngaphambi kokuhlangana nomntu ophuphayo, imvelaphi ye-hormone ayisona isono ukuxhasa umntu ongenalo mbono, naye ngokwakhe. Kwaye nangakumbi unokuqonda abafazi abakholelwa ukuba "ubuhlobo bakho obubi bekhona kum." Bonke aba bafazi bazuzwa kubuhlobo ngenxa yokutshata (ngamanye amaxesha ukungcola, kodwa kungekhona namhlanje). Ubudlelwane kuphela ngesondo - into eqhelekileyo. Izidingo zesondo azikho ngaphantsi komnye na, kwaye ukuphunyezwa kwazo yinto engokwemvelo. Kwimeko yobomi bentombi, kunokubakho ixesha xa ephuma ebudlelwaneni obungunaphakade, kwaye akusikho isizathu sokushiya iminqweno ehambelana nendawo esondeleyo.
Ukuphumla ngokwesondo
Kwimbali yabantu abaqhuba isondo ngaphandle kwembopheleleko, yonke into ibonakala iyakhaka. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abafazi ekuxoxaneni nabahlobo bayavuma ukuba oku yiyo kanye abayidingayo.
"Khawucinge ngomntu owawuthandayo njengendoda enokuba nayo yonke imbopheleleko elandelayo?" "Ayikho into engcolileyo," intombazana enjalo yayicinga. "Ndiyayibona loo nto ndiyayiphulaphule - ndifuna ntoni kuye?" Ukuba kuthethe ngesondo kwaye ukuba loo mntu akayiqondi, sithetha Kuphela oku, kwaye akukho nkathazo! "
Ukuba intombazana inengcamango ecacileyo yento ayifunayo ngayo ubudlelwane nomntu othile, kwaye imeko leyo ngokwayo inika ukwaneliseka, akukho nto inokuthetha ngayo. Isizathu sokucinga singabonakala xa ubudlelwane obusondeleyo ngaphandle koxanduva lugxininiswe neemeko ezongezelelweyo ezonakalisa ukusikeka kwazo. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ngaba oonxibelelwano babonakala ebomini bakho emva kokuqhawula okanye ukwahlukanisa, njengokungathi uhlawulela yonke iminyaka esetyenziswe ebukhosini bemisebenzi yasekhaya kunye neemfazwe zasekhaya. Mhlawumbi kwithuba elithile emva kwekhefu kwaye ngokwemvelo uhamba ebhaptizweni lokukhululeka, kodwa ukuba idizazisi ibalekile, cinga ngezinto ozenzayo. Musa ukuziphindisela kwixesha langaphambili ngenxa yokuhlambalaza kunye nobunzima kwaye ngaba lixesha lokuqalisa ubomi obutsha, unzima kwixesha elidlulileyo? Okanye akusibopheli ngesondo - le yindlela ephela yayazi indlela yokujongana namadoda, kodwa uyazi malunga nazo zonke ezinye iziganeko zobomi kuphela kwiibali zabahlobo bakho? Okanye mhlawumbi le isondo ngokuqhelekileyo ixhunyiwe kuwe ngokungakumbi ngokuzonwabisa, njengaye? Umzekelo, "abasetyhini banamhlanje benza loo nto" okanye "ndibubi ngaphezu kwamadoda? Ndifuna kuphela kuphela ngesondo!". Ezi kunye nezinye iintlobo ezongezelelweyo zobudlelwane obukhethiweyo ngaphandle kwembopheleleko zithetha ukuba yonke into ayithethi kwaye yendalo kwaye kuyafaneleka ukujonga ngokukodwa oko ukwenzayo, ukulala ngesinye isikhathi.
Indlela eyenziwe ngayo
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba ubulili bobubele bubukeka njani kwiibali zabathengi, kukho iingxaki, kwaye zininzi. Ukuze ufumane uninzi lwalo mbhalo, akwanele nje ukufumana umntu ofanelekileyo, kufuneka ulandele imithetho emithathu.
- Thetha omnye nomnye (ukuze ungenayo isitifiketi evela kwi-venereologist kumlingane wakho rhoqo).
- Musa ukulinda kakhulu (kwaye ungalili kamva, xa ungenakuvakalelwa nantoni na ngaphandle komdla, umntu akayi kubiza usuku lwakho lokuzalwa).
- Ukuthetha ngezinto zonke ngokuthe ngqo (oko kukuthi, libale ngokuqhelekileyo "ngokuqhelekileyo, ndiza kucinga" kwaye "kakuhle, ndiya kuzama ukuphuma kwangethuba").
1. Ngaba uzive unetyala okanye uhlazekile?
Ngenxa yezizathu zonqulo okanye zenkcubeko, okanye izizathu zokuziphatha, abanye abafazi banamava ngenxa yokuba banokuzonwabisa "okungekho nto". Awunakuzingcaza uze ulandele amalebula. Kodwa ukuba uyaziqinisekisa ukuba oku kwenziwa kuphela ngamahenyu, awusoze ufumana oko ufuna kwisini ngaphandle kokuzibophezela.
2. Ngaba utywala utywala ukuze ukhululeke? Ukuba ulungele ubulili bobubele, kuphela xa ulahlekile i-cocktail-enye kwaye akukho nto enye, mhlawumbi, le meko yonke ayibonakali engqondweni yakho njengento eyamkelekileyo njengoko uzama ukuziqinisekisa.
Z. Ngaba uyazixoka?
Ngaba ngokwenene ufuna kuphela isondo? Khawuthethe into oyifunayo, kodwa uthembeke kuwe. Ngokufanelekileyo ukufaka amadoda inkxaso "ngesondo ngobudlelwane" kuphela kwimeko apho intombazana iyavuma kuye. Ukuqonda - kuthetha ngokuqonda okucacileyo ukuba kuwe konke oku kufana nangoko. Bobabini kwaye kufuneka baqonde ngokufanayo uhlobo loxhumo lwakho.
4. Ngaba unayo nayiphi na imihango ephathelene nesondo?
Ukuba wenza isondo esifanelekileyo kwiindawo ezithile (njengendlela yokukhetha, yindoda kuphela ekhaya, kodwa akakho ekhaya, ukugqoka kwangaphambi komhla okanye ukulungele ukudibana kuphela nommandla wesixeko apho ungabaziyo) zibonisa ukuba wenza ntoni akuyinto engokwemvelo ngokwayo. Kucacile ukuba ufuna i-cover, mask, ukuqonda zakho injongo.
5. Uyayithanda? Ngaba uyonwabile?
Emva koko, le nto ibaluleke kakhulu: ingaba uyavuya kuyo yonke le nto? Okanye uzixelele ukuba kungcono kunanto? Injongo yesini kukuzonwabisa. Ngokukhawuleza ukuba uqaphele ukuba ulala nendoda, kuba ubonakala uvumelene, umanga uze uhambe ngonaphakade.
"Ndiyakuthanda"
Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu, ngaphandle koxanduva olulodwa, ubusuku bobudlelwane buya kugqiba nge-banal, iimvakalelo zethenda. Umbutho wezobuGcisa weCanada ulwabiwo-mali: ama-56% wabasetyhini abahlolisayo babecinga ukuba bangene ebudlelwaneni obunzulu ngakumbi kunye nesondo ngaphandle kwemithwalo. Oku kuqondakalayo: ulwalamano luhlobo olusondeleyo lobomi, nangona ungaboni ngokuqhubeka kwabo. Ngoko ke kufuneka uyenze ukwenzela ukuba ungenzi isinqumo esingalunganga? Thatha ixesha, hlalutya imeko. Yaye ungathembeki kuwe kuphela, kodwa nakumntu: ukuba ufuna into engaphezu kwesondo, yithetha. Ngaba ulwa nalo? Yeka iintlanganiso zakho. Ngaphandle koko, konke okukulindeleyo kukuhlukana kakhulu.