Yintoni enokuyenza, yiyiphi amagama okubuyisela loo mntu? Konke kuxhomekeke kwindlela olwahlukana ngayo.
Eyona nto ikhethekileyo xa abantu besasazeka ngokuthula ngokwaneleyo. Ukuba intombazana yona yamphonsa loo mntu - ngoko umsebenzi unako, njengoko kuba nzima, kwaye ube lula ngakumbi. Inyaniso kukuba umntu unokuba nemizwa enamandla, kwaye akayi kukwazi ukumelana nawo. Kodwa, ngakolunye uhlangothi, unokuba nomsindo nomsindo emphefumlweni wakhe, ngenxa yokuba akayi kufuna ukudibana kunye nokuxolelana.
Ngawaphi amagama abuyisela umfana? Kakade, inyaniso. Musa ukutyhola umphefumlo uze uzame ukuzithethelela. Ukuba wenza oku, mhlawumbi le nkwenkwana inquma ukuba ufuna ukumkhohlisa kwakhona, ukudlala kunye naye, kwaye umlahla njengododoli ophukileyo. Oku kuya kubangela ukungafuni kwakhe ukuvuselela nawuphi na ubudlelwane. Ngoko ke, kuya kufuneka uvume ngokunyanisekileyo kumfana osezandleni zakho zonke izono zakho. Kufanelekile ukulibala ngokukratshi. Kubalulekile ukuba uyayiqonda - uyaguquke kwaye ufuna ukuba naye. Uyamthanda kwaye awukwazi ukuhlala ngaphandle kwayo. Awusoze wakushiya kwaye uphinde uphendule iimpazamo zakho. Amagama, kule meko, anokungafani. Into ephambili kukuba bahamba entliziyweni. Ukuba loo mntu uyakuthanda, incoko enye inokwanela ukubuyisela yonke into evamile.
Le meko ibuhlungu ngakumbi xa ukuhlukana kwenzeke ngokukrakra, ukuhlambalaza nokuhlambalaza. Nguwaphi amagama onokubuyisela umfana wakho kwimeko enzima kangaka? Nantsi enye ayikwazi ukulawula ngentetho enye. Le nsizwa yashiya i-sludge enkulu, umsindo kunye nentukuthelo. Ngaphandle koko, ulahlekelwe ithemba kuwe kwaye ngoku uya kucinga ngamakhulu amawaka ngaphambi kokuba akholelwe okungenani elinye ilizwi othethileyo. Apha ufanele uchithe ngaphezu kosuku olunye ukumkholisa ngokunyaniseka kweemvakalelo, ngaphandle koko, akukho mntu unokuqinisekisa ukuba umphumo uya kuhlala ulungile. Kodwa ukuba uyayithanda ngokwenene, kufuneka ukulwe lokugqibela. Ngoko ke, ngamandla akho onke, zama ukuzithemba kwakhona. Kukho iindlela ezininzi kule nto, kwaye konke kuxhomekeke kwinto yakho yindoda kunye nokuba ungamlimaza kangakanani.
Kulula ukuvuselela iimvakalelo xa kukho ithuba nangona kunjalo ukuba uqhagamshelane nomntu. Ukuba ufunda kunye, sebenze okanye ngabahlobo kunye nabanye abantu, ngoko unamathuba amaninzi okumkholisa. Ngendlela, ungayilandeli umfana kwaye uzele ukuxelela indlela umthandayo ngayo. Kule meko, izenzo ziya kuba yingxoxo engcono kunamazwi. Ngoko ke, zama ukubonisa inkxalabo yakho, zama ukukunceda kunokuba unako, kodwa, akukho nhlobo ungayenzi kulo mboniso. Inyaniso yokuba uyamnceda, lo mfana uya kuhlala eyazi, kodwa ukuba wena ngokwakho uza kugxininisa oku, uya kuphinda athathe konke ukuxoka kwaye akayi kukholwa nantoni na.
Zama ukusondela kuye, kodwa ungazifaki okanye ufune. Nika le nkwenkwana ukuba iguquke, inothando kunye namava, kodwa mhlonele, ngoko ke niphakamise naluphi na ukhetho. Khumbula ukuba awukwazi ukwenza, ngoko uzama ukungathembeli kakhulu. Ngoko kuya kuba lula kuwe ukuba usinde ukusilela.
Ikhetho elibi kunazo zonke nelona libi kakhulu kukuba awukho mhlaba oqhelekileyo. Kule meko, kunzima ukubiza umnxeba ngomntu. Umntu ongekho, mhlawumbi, nayiphi na indlela uya kuthintela iintlanganiso kunye noqhagamshelwano. Lapha, ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kufuneka kube nzima. Nangona wena ngokwakho ufanele uqonde ukuba le nto inokuphinda ibuyele, kodwa ayikho enye indlela yokuphuma. Zama ukumbona, thetha, zama ukuchaza kumntu owawuphosakeleyo kwaye uxolo kakhulu malunga noko kwenzeka. Thumela imilayezo edibeneyo, thumela i-sms, kodwa ungayenzi kaninzi. Mnike ixesha lokucinga izinto, ungaphazamisi isikhala apho akubethe khona. Kule meko, kubaluleke kakhulu kuzo zonke izinto ukuba ube nemilinganiselo kwaye ungadluli, ukuze ukuxolisa kwakho kungabi yinto enzima, apho i-young man, ekupheleni kwayo, iya kuba yinto enyanyekayo. Kungenxa yoko, akufanele ucele kwaye ucele. Nokuba uthe wamcaphukisa umfana, ukuhlaziswa kwakhe akuyi kuzisa ngokuqinisekileyo iimvakalelo zakhe. Ukuguquka nokuba yintambo zizinto ezimbini ezihluke ngokupheleleyo.
Ukucela ngokuthe ngqo ukuxolelwa kwakhona ubugcisa. Uyazi oko kukucaphukisa umthandi wakho, kwaye yiziphi izinto azihlonelayo. Kusoloko kuyimfuneko ukuqala kule nto. Ngaphambi kwengxoxo nganye, yonke intlanganiso, cinga ngamazwi akho, ungathethi into engabonakaliyo kwaye ungaguquki into enye ibe yinto enye. Ungakulibali ukuba akayi kukuphulaphula, yabona kwaye wazi. Kwimeko eyenzekayo, umele uxanduva, apha kufuneka ulwa nalo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, bonke abantu bavame ukungalunganga, kodwa ngenxa yephutha lakho, buhlungu umntu. Ngoko ke, ngoku ufumene oko ufanelwe. Mkele oku, kodwa ungazihlambalazi kwaye ungazibandakanyi ukuzithobela. Mane udwebe izigqibo eziyimfuneko uze uzame ukubonakalisa kumntu oye wafunda esi sifundo somphefumlo kwaye akayi kuphinda uphendule iimpazamo zakho, ngoko, ukumlimaza.
Umntu okhubekileyo kunzima ukuyiqinisekisa, kodwa, nangona kunjalo, kungekudala okanye emva koko uza kuziva ukunyaniseka aze akholelwe kuyo. Abantu basakwazi ukwahlukanisa inyaniso kunye nobuxoki kwaye ukuba le ntlezana isenemiva - iya kuba nako ukuxolela. Kodwa ngenxa yoko kufuneka ube nesineke nokuqonda. Ungaguquki kwisithambeko sokunyanzelisa, esihamba kwizithende zomntu. Zama nje ukuba ubekho xa kuyimfuneko, inkxaso, uncedo kwaye uthetha nje ngezinto ozithandayo, thanda ngaphezu kokuphila. Musa ukufuna ubudlelwane kunye nothando, kodwa yenza njalo ukuba loo nto uyayiqonda - iya kuba yinto yolonwabo olukhulu nesipho. Yaye ukuba uya kubuya - unakekele ulonwabo kwaye ungaphinda ulahleke.