Ngoko kuthetha ntoni ukuba umntu uhlala ecela imali? Okokuqala, ukuba wena awuzange uthethe, kodwa umntu unokucela umfazi ngemali kuphela ukuba uyindodana yakhe. Kwaye, ukuya kwixesha elithile. Umntu omdala akayi kuphinda asebenzise imali kumama, ngaphandle kokuba, ngokuqinisekileyo, ungumlwalwala, umlutha weziyobisi okanye umntu onobuqili ongafuniyo kwaye akanako ukufezekisa into ebomini bakhe.
Kuzo zonke iimeko, akukho mntu uza kucela imali kumfazi. Kakade ke, kukho imeko xa ufuna ngokwenene ukucela uncedo, kodwa kulo mzekelo, lo mfana uya kuhlala ethule aze aphele. Oku kuyintloko yenkwenkwezi yindoda, ukuba, ngokuqinisekileyo, iqabane lakho liyindoda yinyani. Ingxaki yezemali kubo yenye yeemeko zentlonelo apho amadoda azivakalisa khona. Yintoni onokuyithetha ngomntu onganqikazi ukucela imali kwintombazana, kwaye rhoqo? Okokuqala, makhe siphendule lo mbuzo: Yintoni efuna ukuba le mali ifunekayo, wathi? Enyanisweni, aba bantu abaselula banokuza kunye neendinyana ezithandabuza iintliziyo zentliziyokazi ye-razhalobyat. Iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zinokuhluka: umama ogulayo, amatyala, izifo nezinye izinto ezininzi. Abanye abantu abatsha bathembisa ukubuyela, kwaye ezinye zizisebenzisa kwiimeko ezinjalo ukuba ziqala ukungazibuza, kodwa zifuna, ngathi intombazana ifanele ibe nento kuye.
Indlela yokwenza ntoni kulo mzekelo? Okokuqala, akufanele ulungele umfana wakho kwaye ufumane inkcazo yezenzo zakhe. Ewe, uthando luphazamisa umbono kunye nokuqonda kwethu, kodwa asifanele sizenze zonke izinto kwifom yeklinikhi. Cinga ngokwakho, ubona njani ikamva kunye nomfana onjalo? Ngaba ucinga ngokucacileyo ukuba ngelinye ilanga uza kutshintsha kwaye aqale ukuzimela ngokuzimela aze axhase intsapho? Ngelishwa, le ngcamango ayinangqiqo. Bonke abantu banomlutha. Ukuba sele umfundisile ukuba aphile ngeendleko zakho kwaye ungaxinzeli, ngoko kutheni ucinga ukuba uya kuthanda ukuyeka indlela enokuthi ikhona kwaye aqale ukuxinwa? Ngelishwa, kukho ezininzi iintsapho apho amadoda adinga ukutya kunye neempahla, kwaye ngaphandle koko, imali yokuzonwabisa, kwaye, ngelo xesha, uhlala phambi kwekhompyutheni okanye iTV, okanye uhlekise kunye nabahlobo. Umfazi, akazukufumana kuphela, kodwa naye wenza ubomi bemihla ngemihla waza wakhulisa abantwana. Cinga malunga nokuba uyavuma ukuhlala nomntu onjalo nokuba ulungele ukuba ngumkhonzi kwaye, ujabule, ikhoboka lakho lobomi bonke. Kubonakala nje ngoku ukuba umntu unokulungiswa aze ahlaziywe, olo thando luyakwazi ukujika iintaba. Enyanisweni, ubomi bubuninzi kakhulu kwaye bukhohlisayo. Kwaye, ukuba umntu osemncinci akafuni nje ukufumana imali, kodwa wenza imali kumfazi, ngoko umlindele ukuba enze into enhle ayikufanelekanga.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, amadoda anako ukufuna imali kwiimfazana zawo zibuqili okanye zikhohlakele. Yaye ukuba iyokuqala ididekile, idlala imvakalelo ejulile, iyakuboniswa imali, ikhuphe imali ngamandla, isebenzise ubukhohlakali nokuhlaselwa. Kwimeko yokuqala, unokuhlala naye kunye nobomi bakho bonke, ngaphandle kokuba, ngokuqinisekileyo, imali iyaphuma okanye ifumene intombi ecebileyo. Umntu onjalo unokukwenza ukuba uzive ngeemvakalelo zakhe kwaye, mhlawumbi, uya kuvuyisa, udla izilwanyana zothando. Kodwa ukhetho lwesibini luyikliniki ngokwenene. Kule meko, indoda ayiyona nje igigolo. Kungenzeka ukuba unokukhubazeka kwengqondo, okanye utywala kakubi kunye neziyobisi. Ngokuqhelekileyo, ukuziphatha okunobundlobongela kubangelwa kukuba umntu akakwazi ukuhlala ngaphandle kwezinto ze-psychotropic. Kwaye, njengoko kuyaziwa, abantu abasebenzisa kakubi izinto ezinjalo abanakukwazi ukubandakanya nayiphi na imisebenzi, njengoko behlala bekhona. Ngoko ke, ukuba umfana wakho ungowalolu hlobo, ufuna uncedo. Kodwa, ukuba akafuni le ncediso, kwaye uyaqonda ukuba awukwazi ukwenza nto nantoni na, kungcono ukuhamba, kungakhathaliseki ukuba ubuhlungu nokuba bunzima kangakanani. Ngezinye izihlandlo abantu abanjalo abanakwenzeka ukuncedisa, kwaye abafazi babo baya kutshabalaliswa ngamaxesha angapheliyo, ukulwa kunye nentlupheko. Kwaye akukho thando luya kulondoloza. Ulwalamano olunjalo luphela kwinto yokuba intombazana ngokwayo itywala okanye iba ngumlutha weziyobisi ngenxa yokuphelelwa yithemba, okanye, uhlala eshiya aze azisole malunga neminyaka elahlekileyo, imali kunye nempilo.
Kwakhona, amadoda asebenzisana nokuhlaselwa, abafuna ukulawula abafazi babo, kodwa abanamandla kuphela. Abafana abengazi kakuhle kwaye baqonda ngokucacileyo ukuba abananto yokuziqhayisa malunga nentombi yabo, kuba abayena mntu ebomini kwaye bekhona kwiindleko zakhe. Oku kubangelwa ukuzithemba kwabo besilisa, kodwa ukungafuni ukutshintsha i-drive ukuya kwinto yokuba le nkwenkwe iqala ukubonakalisa ubungqina bayo ngokuhlazeka nokuhlambalaza. Bazama ukugubungela yonke into ukwenzela ukuba ibhinqa licinga ngathi iphoso lakhe lokuba inkwenkwe yakhe ayinayo imali eyaneleyo kwaye inyanzelekile ukuba imncede kuyo yonke into, ilulaze ityala lakhe.
Ukuba umntu uhlala ecela imali, ke akayena ummeli wesini oqinileyo onokukwazi ukuxhasa intsapho, ukukhulisa abantwana kunye nokubonelela ngomfazi wakhe othandekayo. Enyanisweni, ngumntu obuthathaka kwaye ongenakuhlonipha, kuba ngamnye umntu, iimpahla eziphathekayo ziyingenye yezona zinto ziphambili ebomini. Kuphela umntu ophumelelayo uzive ezalisekile ebomini. Ukuba umntu wakho akayinyamekeli nonke, oko akunjalo ukuba uyindoda. Emva koko, aba bafazi bayavunyelwa ukuba bahlale emqaleni kwendoda baze bangabi nantoni. Kwaye umntu owenza oku, nje akangabangela intlonelo. Cinga ngako, kuba emva kwayo yonke ibhinqa langempela, kufuneka kubekho indoda efanelekileyo nehlonelweyo.