Ukunyanzela umntwana kumtshato wokuqala

Enye yeengxaki eziqhelekileyo abantu abajamelene nazo xa ukutshata kwakhona kuthathwa ngokuba ngumona ngomntwana wokuqala kumtshato wokuqala. Okokuqala, lo mkhwele awuxhunyiwe kuphela ngumntwana, kodwa kunye nobudlelwane bomyeni kunye nomfazi owayengumfazi kunye nomama wesikhathi salo mntwana. Apha ungaphinda udibanise ubunzima ebuhlotsheni bomfazi wesibini nomntwana womyeni wakhe kumtshato wokuqala.

Umtshato wesibini kaninzi akakwazi ukwabelana ngqalelo kwindoda kunye nexesha lakhe lokukhulula phakathi kwakhe nomntwana kumtshato ongaphambili. Yiyo kanye into eyenza abafazi banomona ngomtshato wabo wokuqala. Nantoni na into oyithethayo, inxalenye enkulu yezinto ezimbi kule meko iya kumntwana, kuba inkunzi ihlala yinto "ye-aple yokungahambelani" kwintsapho entsha.

Ungayinqoba njani umona kwaye ugcine ubudlelwane obuhle nomntwana?

Kufuneka uqaphele ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba ukuze ulondoloze umtshato wakho kwaye uzuze uthando oluhle kumntu othandekayo, kufuneka ube nomonde okhethekileyo kunye nokunyamezela ukuphatha wakho umntwana / umzala. Le ngundoqo ephambili ebomini bakho bentsapho ngaphandle kwengxaki. Khumbula ukuba umfazi onothando ngokwenene uyamkela indoda yakhe kunye nemibutho yomtshato yangaphambili kwaye, ngokufanelekileyo, abantwana abavela kubo. Ukuba umfazi wesibini akakwazi ukwamukelwa ngumntu omthandayo kunye nokufihla umona wesikhwele ngenxa yeli xesha elidlulileyo (ngumbuzo womntwana), ngoko akamkeli loo ndoda ngokwakhe.

Ngendlela efanelekileyo ukuziphatha ngayo ngokuphathelele kumfazi wokuqala nomntwana womyeni kumtshato wokuqala?

Kuhlala kulufanelekile ukukhumbula ukuba umfazi owayengumyeni wesithandwa akafanele ukuba akhathazeke ngentlalo yengqondo yomfazi wamanje. Uhlala ubomi bakhe kwaye iimvakalelo zowesibini umfazi zigqityiwe. Mhlawumbi uhlala enzulwini yomphefumlo wakhe njengowesifazane kwaye unokwenza ingqalelo kwenzalo yakho, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo akayi kuyeka, avumele umyeni wakhe owayengumyeni ukuba axhumane nomntwana.

Ukuba unomona kakhulu ngomntwana, ngoko kwimbono yeengqondo zeengqondo, ngandlela-thile uzivakalelwa kukuba unetyala. Emva kwakho konke, umlingane wangaphambili kule meko ixhoba, kwaye wena kwiindleko zakhe kunye neakhawunti yomntwana wabo oqhelekileyo isiseko sobuhlobo babo. Kufuneka uphinde ucinge ngesimo sakho kwaye usondele kule ngxaki ngoxanduva kunye nenhlonipho.

Zixhomekeke ekubeni inkosikazi yangaphambili kunye nomyeni wakho banamalungelo okuthetha kunye nokuphakamisa umntakwabo. Kule ndawo awukwazi ukusinda. Ukongeza, iqabane lakho lenza oku ukuze ulondoloze ubomi bentwana. Umfazi wangaphambili kunye nomntwana unelungelo elipheleleyo lokubiza endlwini yakho kwaye wabelane noyihlo malunga nento eyenzekayo, kwaye ukuba kuyimfuneko nokuba ucele uncedo, kokubili kokomoya kunye nezinto eziphathekayo. Ukunyamezela nokuqonda yimizwi ephambili ekufuneka ithathe indawo yomsindo ongenangqondo.

Sakha intsapho yethu enempilo ngaphandle kokuba nomona

Ukuba ufuna intsapho yakho ibe namandla kwaye uyonwabile, ungamkhathazi umyeni wakho malunga neemvakalelo zakho zomona kumtshato wokuqala, ngakumbi umfazi wokuqala. Gcina yonke indlela eya kuwe, kuba ukucacisa ngokugqithiseleyo ubudlelwane kwesi sihloko kunokunciphisa ngokupheleleyo umtshato. Indoda ayiyi kumthanda umntwana ngaphantsi kwakho kwaye kulungile ukukhumbula.

Musa ukunciphisa uxhulumaniso lomyeni kunye nosana kumtshato wokuqala. Zama ngazo zonke iindlela ukuseka unxibelelwano olungileyo nomntwana, kodwa nje ukuthetha, kwaye ungaxhasi kunye nosizo lwezipho. Kukho iimeko xa umfazi owayengumfazi ngokwakhe engavumi ukunxibelelana komntwana kunye nomfazi omtsha ebomini bukayise. Kodwa, njengomthetho, oku kunene kunyaka wokuqala emva komtshato.

Kwaye ukulungisa isihloko, khumbula ukuba indoda, ngenxa yomfazi wamanje, inako ukuyeka ukuthetha nomntwana kumtshato owedlule, ngumntu oxhomekeke kuye kunye nobuthathaka. Akunjalo ukuba ixesha liya kuza, kwaye awuyi kuvakalelwa kuwe. Kulungile kwaye kuqhelekileyo xa indoda emtshatweni wesibini inakekela abantwana abasemtshatweni wangaphambili kwaye inxibelelwano oluhle oluqinileyo nolwalamlingane.

Yaye ukuba sele usenabantwana abaqhelekileyo, ungagxininisi ukuba zibaluleke ngaphezu kokuqala. Akukho ilungelo lakho lokufuna ukuba abantwana bakho bathathe le ndawo. Upapa kufuneka akwazi ukunxibelelana kunye nabantwana kwimibutho yokuqala, kunye ne-joint.