Ukuqwalasela ukuziphatha kakubi komntwana

"Umntwana Wendalo" - eli binzana lisebenza ngokupheleleyo kubantwana abancinci, kuba bengayazi imithetho yemigangatho yokuziphatha eyamkelwe kuyo. Baye bacaphukiswa - njengetyhuyi - ngokunyanzeliswa kuthathwa ngummelwane wayo, kungekhona yonke into yokungabaza ukuba kulungile. Le ndlela yokuziphatha, apho izazi zengqondo zibiza umnxeba wabantwana, ziqhelekile. Kubonakala kwasebuntwaneni, ulwaphulo lukhula ngokukhawuleza ngexesha lokuqala lokufunda, ngaphambi kokunyuka ngokwemvelo. Ukuqwalasela ukuziphatha kakubi komntwana - isihloko sokupapashwa.

Kubantwana, akuqhelekanga - ngamnye umntwana ubuncinane kanye xa ebomini ephihliweyo okanye eshayisa enye, ngaphandle kwayo, akenzi ngisho nabantwana abancincileyo nabafundileyo. Akuyimfuneko ukuba uSukhomlinsky acacise umntwana, owatshintshela esinye isikhalazo kwindawo yokudlala okanye wasusa umdlalo owamthandayo, okungafanele kwenziwe. Kutheni? Uninzi lwabantwana alukho okokuqala, kodwa ukususela kwisithathu, ukusuka kwisihlanu, bayakwazi ukuqonda oku: kuba enye injengobuhlungu okanye inzondo njengoko uyenzela ukuba ngaba benze oku kuwe. Ukunciphisa ukunyuka komnxeba kuhambelana nezinto eziphambili - kunye nokuba abantwana bayakhula kwaye baphantsi kwempembelelo yemfundo baqala ukuqonda ngakumbi abanye kunye nabo, bezama ukuziphatha ngokuthe tye. Bajwayele ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo kunye nokuxhomekeka kwabo, ukuxazulula iingxabano ngendlela engacinyiyo-amagama, kungekhona. Inkqubo yentlalo ingenakukhunjelwa kubantwana abaninzi, kwaye uneminyaka engama-6-7, abantwana bazincama kwaye baqala ukuqonda ngcono iimvakalelo nezenzo zabanye.

Iimpawu zabaqhubi

Nangona kunjalo, akubona bonke abantwana abafumana ama-metamorphosis afanayo. Kukho abo abangahluthi utshani, sebenzisa amandla kuphela. Laba bafana baqala ukuba nomsindo, ukungaqiniseki, ukungabikho nto. Banobunzima ekuxoxaneni noontanga, banyuke ukuxhalaba, ukungakhuselekanga. Abantwana abanjalo abayinyamekeli iimvakalelo zabanye, bayathinteka kakhulu kodwa bengayazi indlela yokukhusela iminqweno yabo ngoncedo lweengxabano ezifanelekileyo. Abanelisekanga ngokomzwelo, bafuna ukuhlawulela oku kubangela abanye ubuhlungu - ngaphezu kwakho konke, ngokomzimba. Ukhuselo olufanelekileyo kubo luhlaselo. Ubanika i-shaky neyesikhashana, kodwa ubuncinane ibhalansi yangaphakathi. Ngoxa uguqulela izenzo zabanye abantwana njengento enenzondelelo, umntwana onjalo ngokuziphendulela kwakhe kubangela ukugqithisa kwabanye. Ngexesha elifanayo liya kuba yinqanaba eliyingozi - yiyiphi intsapho iya kufuna ukutshata kumntu ophantse ukukugxotha ngamanqindi? Ngokuziphatha kwabo, aba bantwana bayabagxotha abanye, kubangele ukuba bangabuthandani, bangabuthandani, bangenalo. Kwaye, oku, kuqinisa intlonelo, kumenza umntwana enze izinto ezingenakulungelelanisa, eshukumisa ukwesaba nomsindo kuye. Oko kukuthi, uya kuvuyela ukuthetha nabafana, uzama ngokukhawuleza ukufumana indlela yokuphuma kwintsimi, ukubuyisela, ngoko kuthetha, ubudlelwane bezenhlalakahle, kodwa akayazi nje indlela yokwenza ngendlela eqhelekileyo, ifom.

Ngaba a makhwenkwe akhulu?

Iingcali zenzululwazi azikaze zifike kwisigqibo esicacileyo, ngaba ukuxhatshazwa kwamadoda, kwaye ngoko ke abafana, ubunjani bezinto eziphilayo ezilungiselelwe ngaphambili? Ewe, ngokweengxelo ezininzi, amadoda ngokwenene aziphatha ngokugqithiseleyo kunabesifazana, nangaliphi na ubudala. Ukuphendula malunga "nokuhlaselwa" kwenzelwe ukuba kucace. Ukuba umama uqala ukufunda imilinganiselo yokuziphatha: "Ukuba uthe wathinta, awuyithandi," umntwana unokweqa isifundo esibuhlungu ngeendlebe. Ngamanye amaxesha kunokwaneleyo nje ukuthi: "Vanya, hayi!", Xa umqhubi uya kuguquka. Njengoko kuya kubonakala kubo bonke ukuba abafana baziphatha ngokugqithiseleyo kunamantombazana, balwa rhoqo. Nangona kunjalo, ubungqina bemvelo yabo yendlela yokuziphatha, abagqirha okanye abaphilayo abanakho ukusibonisa. Mhlawumbi, kwenye into - kwiinkcubeko nezenkcubeko. Iimpawu zentlalo zendlela yokuziphatha ezibonelelwa kubafana abafani kakhulu nezo zinikezelwa kumantombazana. Ukunyanyiswa kukuyingxenye yesigxina somntu wokuziphatha, ngokuqhelekileyo kulindeleke kwaye kukhuthazwe. Ukuba kukho enye ibinzana elithi "isondo esomeleleyo", elide lixhomekeke kwiimpawu ezifanayo kwiilwimi ezahlukeneyo zehlabathi. Ngokukhawuleza xa umntwana eqala ukuhamba kwaye udibanisa noontanga (oko kukuthi, ngokoqobo ngonyaka wesibini wobomi), kukho ukungafani kolukhulu kwimfundo yabafana kunye namantombazana, kwimeko yokuba abazali kunye noluntu balindele kuzo zombini kwaye, ngoko ke, kumafama asakhulayo iimpawu zobuntu. Le nkwenkwe idunyiswa ukususela kumncinane ukuba ibe nesibindi, imilingo, umsebenzi, ukukwazi ukukhawuleza, ukuzimela. Intombazana enamandla kunye nekhono elizimisele ukulawula kunye nokuzimela "ukujongana" nabaphulaphuli, ihlala igwetyelwe iimpawu ezifanayo. Ngoko sinokucinga ukuba kusekufunyenwe, kodwa ayikho imfanelo engafanelekanga.

Kutheni kunjalo

Ngokutsho kweengxelo zengqondo, abantwana abanomdla, njengomthetho, abanalo uthando oluyisiseko kunye nokuqonda kwiintsapho zabo. Ngokuqhelekileyo kwiintsapho apho abantwana banjalo bekhula, indlela yokukhulisa ilawulwa. Esikhundleni soqhagamshelwano olupheleleyo, abazali (njengomthetho, lo ngowokuqala kwaye unobunzima nootata) unika imiyalelo kwaye ulindele ukuphunyezwa kwazo ngokucacileyo. Kwakhona kwenzeka ukuba umntwana ngokubanzi akanamsebenzi omncinci, ukhula yena ngokwakhe, eziva engento engenakunceda, ukungabikho kokuthintana nomvakalelo, ukungabikho kokukhathazeka kunye nokunganakwa kwabazali. Isitayela se-egocentric sokukhulisana sikhokelela ekunyuseni. Umntwana ufundiswa ukuba uyinkohlakalo yomhlaba, apho kuyo yonke indawo iphela. Kucacile ukuba abanye abantwana kunye nabantu abadala abakwaziyo ngale nto, kwaye ukuziphatha kwabo kubangela ukuba umntwana angathandeki kunye nemimoya, afumane amahlazo kunye nokulwa. Impembelelo eyingozi kwi-psyche yabantwana iphinde iqhutywe ngabantu abadala. Xa ubaba nomama behlambalaza imihla ngemihla, umntwana uyazibandakanya ngokungathandabuzeki le ndlela yokunxibelelana. Kuba kuye kuyinto evamile. Ngoko ke, abazali abaye baqaphela ukunyuka kwamandla okulwa phakathi kwabantwana babo kufuneka baqale bajonge. Kungenzeka ukuba wena ngokwakho awuyi kulawula rhoqo iimpembelelo zakho. Kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba abantwana bafunda iindlela zokusebenzisana nentlalo, bejonga ukuziphatha kwabantu abajikelezile (kwaye, okokuqala, abazali babo).

Ulwaphulo-mthetho nohlwayo

Ukuba umntwana ufezekisile into ethile ngoncedo lobundlobongela, uya kucela uncedo lwakhe ngokuphindaphindiweyo. Nangona kunjalo, ingxaki kukuba ukusetyenziswa kwesigwebo sokuqhawulwa kwintlondi kudla ngokuqinisekileyo. Ngokukodwa uxhatshazwa ngokusemthethweni. Ngendlela, ngokuqhelekileyo zikhokelela ekubeni umntwana uqala ukubetha abanye. Ukuze ulwaphulo lwabantwana lungagcini nje kuphela, kodwa luye lwaphazamiseka, luyinkqubo enzima kakhulu. Kubalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba imfuno ebalulekileyo yantoni na umntwana kuyimfuneko yokuziva ukuba uyathandwa kwaye uyakwazisa. Ngoko unyango lobudlova obandayo lunokuba ngumntu othembekileyo, onobubele kumntwana. Ukuthatha inxaxheba kobawo, ngomzekelo wakhe ubonisa unyana wakhe ukuba ubukhulu bokwenene abukwazi ukugqumisa i-raspkasit ekhaleni kumntu owonayo, kodwa ukulawula amandla akhe emzimbeni othile. Ungashintsha ingqalelo, uthi, kwinto ethile "yokuchaneka" yomsebenzi. Indlela efanelekileyo kukurekhoda umqhubi kwinqanaba lezemidlalo, ekhokelwa ngumqeqeshi onamava kunye nezakhono zengqondo. Unokufumana "umlotha onomsindo" okhethekileyo wokunciphisa uxinzelelo. Ukuba umntwana uyamthukuthelela umntu, makamthathe aze atyelele le mtolo. Le ngcebiso isoloko ihanjiswa kubaphathi bezengqondo kunye nabaxhasi babo abadala, kuba akukho ntliziyo ongenayo inceba. Ekubeni ngokucacileyo asikuphathani nabo, kulufanelekile ukufunda nokufundisa abantwana bakho ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo ezimbi, kungabonakali ubomi okanye bona.