Emva koko, kuphela ekhaya, kwisangqa seentsapho zethu, siziziva sikhuselekile. Ngamanye amaxesha senza izinto ezingenakwenzeka ngenxa yabathandekayo bethu. Kodwa, ngelanga, ubudlelwane obugqibeleleyo kwintsapho banqabile. Ngokuqhelekileyo sibona ulwalamano olusisiseko lwentsapho, phantsi koko amaqabane axabana nawo, afunyanise ubudlelwane.
Ngokuphindaphindiweyo konke ukuxhatshaliswa ngumtshato. Uza ngokukhawuleza, kodwa kubonakala ngathi le nto iqhubeka. Kunzima xa umntwana echaphazelekayo kulwalamano kunye nentando yokuphela. Njengabazali abazange bazenze ukuba yonke into ihamba phambili, kukho ukungadibanisi kulwalamano kunoma yintoni na. Into ephambili kukuba abazali emva kokuqhawula umtshato baye bahlala behlonipha omnye nomnye, okuyinto engaqabile kakhulu, kuba ngaloo mzuzu yonke imvakalelo igalelo, kwaye abazange bazame ukukhohlisa umntwana ngamnye ngendlela yakhe.
Kule meko, umntwana uthatha umbono ohlangene nomntu ekugqibeleni inkundla inquma ukushiya umntwana. Umntwana akanako ukungazi yonke inyaniso ixesha elide kwaye akavumelani nezenzo zesibini iqabane. Nangona ekuqhawuleni umtshato, njengokuba kukho nayiphi na ingxabano nokungavumelani, bobabini banetyala, kunjalo. Ukufuna izizathu zokuqhawula umtshato kunye nomyeni kubalulekile kwakhona. Ngokuqhelekileyo ubuhlobo bentsapho kunye nokubeka imodeli yobomi besikhathi esizayo. Emva koko, ubudlelwane bentsapho budlala indima ebaluleke kakhulu ekwakheni ubudlelwane bomntwana kwixesha elizayo kunye nesini esahlukileyo.
Ingqondo yabantwana, eqhubeka "ihlambulukileyo" kwiindlela ezahlukeneyo zokuziphatha esingaziqondi kakuhle imihla ngemihla ebomini bethu, ngokukhawuleza kwaye ngokufanelekileyo "ayifumananga" kungekhona nje isigxina sezwi kunye nesantya sokuthetha, kodwa oko ubaba akuxelele kunina, kwaye ukuba umama makenze oku mpendulo. Khumbula ukuba kaninzi kangakanani sijonga iingxabano kwiimidlalo yabantwana, xa omnye wabantwana ebonisa ukuba umama kufanele akhulume ngale ndlela (oko kukuthi, oko umama akutshoyo kwimeko eqhelekileyo). I-psyche yezingane kufuneka ikhuselwe kwizinto ezinjalo. Kodwa ngaba ngumntu omdala ngeli xesha? Baziva njani, bedlala ngezinye izikhathi ukunganakwa. Emva koko, zingaphi iingxabano kunye nokuqhawula umtshato zingagwenywa kuphela ngokulinganisa ukuqhosha nokufunda nokuqonda iingcamango zomchasi. Kodwa, ngelishwa, oku, njengokubonakalisa ukubonisa, akunakwenzeka ebomini bethu.
Iingxaki zomsebenzi, iimoto zengqungquthela, imigca, iingxaki ezincinci zemihla ngemihla, ukuzihawukela. Kwenzeka kaninzi, ngenxa yokungalindelekanga kunye nokuzingca, asiyiva okanye sibone oko kwenzekayo kumthande wethu. ILizwi ngelizwi, njengoko kudla njalo, ngenxa yezinto ezingenangqondo, ebaluleke kakhulu, sibheka ingxabano. Ukuthetha izinto ezimbi komnye nomnye, kunzima kakhulu ukuzincama nokujonga imeko, ukuyihlolisisa. Ukuqhawula umtshato, nangona imibutho emibini ibandakanyeka, akukho abaphumeleleyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, umntu omnye uba ngumqalisi, isizathu siyakwazi ukupholisa kumlingane kwaye udibana nomdla omtsha.
Ewe, le ngxwa lwenzeka. Bobabini abalingani abavakalelwa kukuba akukho ndlela efanelekileyo, ukuba bangathethi. Emva koko, lowo ushiywe ngokuzenzekelayo uya kuthandana nokushiya nothando lobuqhophololo. Akayiqondi ukuba lo ngumthetho wobomi: into esingayigcini, kodwa silahlekelwa ukukhala. Into yokudumisa, okwakusandula kutshatyalaliswa ngoku kutshatyalaliswa ngokupheleleyo, ngoku ingomnye. Napha, kwakhona, umona, ukuzivala, ukuphazamiseka, ukuphazamisa amaphupha ezayo.
Ndiyicinga, kwaye abaninzi baya kuvuma kunye nam, ukuqhawula umtshato kungabonwa ngenye yezinto ezithintekayo kakhulu kungekuphela kwesibini esisodwa, kodwa nangomntu. Iziqhelo eziqhelekileyo ziyawa. Ngokuqhelekileyo ukungazithembi kwintembeko esinikwa ngesini esahlukileyo ngokukhawuleza ...
Ukwahlukana nomyeni kunye nosapho lwakhe ubudlelwane, kunye nokudlala i-tennis, awukwazi ukufunda kumava omnye umntu.