Umfazi ohlakaniphile, indoda ehlakaniphile kunye nokulula

Ngamanye amaxesha wonke umntu ufuna ukuphumla kunye nokuzonwabisa, ngaphandle kokucinga ngemiphumo. Izizathu zezi zinto zihlukileyo: ukukhutshwa emsebenzini, ukungabi nokuqonda kwezihlobo okanye ukuhlukana nomntu othandekayo. Kodwa, ukuze kungenzeki, ngamanye amaxesha amadoda namabhinqa bafuna ukuphazamisa kwaye bazikhohlwe. Yingakho baya kwimivalo kunye neeklabhu. Kodwa, umbuzo uvela nokuba ngaba kunokwenzeka ukunyanzela umfazi onobuhlakani kunye nomntu onobuqili, engenazo izibophelelo, okanye mhlawumbi umfana uya kuhlala ethemba into engakumbi?

Ngokuqhelekileyo, yintoni na kule meko ithetha umfazi okhaliphile, indoda ehlakaniphile kunye nokulula ukudlala? Eyokuqala, makhe sihlaziye indlela yokuziphatha kwentombazana enengqondo engafuni umntu ukuba awele umgca. Ngoko ke, ukuba le ntokazi ayiyi kuchitha ubusuku kunye nomfana, akasoze amvumela ukuba amphathe ngeenkwenkwezi kunye nezinye iziphuzo okanye ukutya. Inyaniso kukuba wonke umntu uyazi lo mthetho ongabhaliwe: Ndikhala apha, kwaye ke uya kuhlawula. Ukuphatha umfokazi, umfana wenza igalelo kwaye ufuna ukufumana izabelo. Ukuba oku kungenzeki, unokudumala kakhulu kwaye unomsindo, oku kuya kubangela ukuxabana kunye nobudlova. Ewe, ukucaphukisa umfazi kuphantsi, kodwa kunjalo, ngokubanzi, kwiimeko ezinjalo, kuyinyani, kuhlangothini lwabantu. Emva kwakho konke, zonke iintombi zamantombazana ziyazi ukuba i-cheese yamahhala iphela kwi-mousetrap, ngoko kufuneka ulahle, okanye uye ekupheleni. Amadoda angatshatanga, eza kwiqela, ngokuqhelekileyo abheka amantombazana onokuchitha nabo ubusuku. Enyanisweni, bahlawula i-cocktails kunye nezinye izinto eziza kuba nethemba elizayo. Kwaye, ukuba intombazana iqala ukulahla ngomzuzu wokugqibela, nangona ngaphambi kokuba idle ngokuzonwabisa kunye nokusela nokuziphatha ngokucacileyo kungekhona ngokungaqhelekanga, ngoko ke, loo nto inokuyithukuthela kwaye iyinto enhle ukuba ingumfana osemdala. Ngaphandle koko, kunokubakho ukuxabana okanye ukulwa.

Yingakho, umfazi okhaliphile kufuneka akhumbule enye into - ngokukhawuleza wabeka imida kunye neefom apho angayi kuhamba khona. Ukuba umfana ekwazini, zama ukumxelela ngokukhawuleza into onokuyithemba ngayo noko kungenjalo, kwaye igama elithi "hayi" lithetha ukuba "hayi", kungekhona "ewe, kodwa kamva". Umfana kufuneka azi ukuba ulindele ntoni kwaye unelungelo lokuthatha umhlalaphantsi, ukuba ukhetho olunjalo aluhambelani. Yaye ungacatshuki kwaye unomsindo, kuba ungabantu abakhululekile abangakwaziyo kunye nabangenanto into kumhlobo. Kwaye, nangona kunjalo, akufanele uhlakulele izinto ezinzima kuwe, ukuba ungendawo kwaye unjalo. Ukuba umntu wokuqala wafika kuwe, wambamba. Ngaloo ndlela, ngoku kusihlwa unamanye amacebo angavumelani nawe, konke oko.

Yintoni elula yokudlala ngothando? Yilapho intombazana ngokwayo ingahambi ngaphaya kwemida yento evunyelweyo kwaye ayivumeli lo mfana. Imifanekiso, ibukeka, ichukumisa ukukhanya, ukudansa, mhlawumbi kumanga, kodwa akukho. Musa ukuvuka kumntu ovuthayo ngokwesondo. Awuyi kuchitha ubusuku kunye naye, ngoko kutheni uhluthwa umfana? Ukongeza, ukuba uwela ngaphaya komgca, awukwazi ukuzibamba. Yaye ukuba uyayiqonda ukuba uya kuyika lo mso, yima uze ukhumbule ngako. Ngamanye amaxesha, phantsi kwefuthe leemvakalelo kunye notywala, senza iimpazamo, esizisola ngazo ixesha elide. Ngoko ke, ukuba uya kwi-nightclub yedwa, zenzele isigqibo sokuba uza kuvumela ntoni, kwaye oko kungeke kwenzeke, kungakhathaliseki ukuba iimeko zikhula njani. Ngokuqinisekileyo landela isicwangciso sakho. Nangona ufuna ukulahleka ngokukhawuleza, khumbula into othembisa yona kunye nemiphumo yakho. Kwaye, bhetele kubo bonke, thabathe kunye nomhlobo othembekileyo okanye intombi enokuzithobela ngokunyanisekileyo ukuziphatha kwakho, kwaye ukuba kwenzeka ntoni, baya kumisa bayeke kwiqela. Vala abantu kunye nabahlobo abathandekayo ngumgcini mgcini weziphene kunye nobuwula.

Ngendlela, umntu ohlakaniphile uziphathe njani? Ewe, okokuqala, akadingi ukuphinda ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngokuphindaphindiweyo okufunayo, kunye noko ungayenzi. Umfana onjalo akayi kuhlala engapheliyo kwaye enqwenela ukukukholisa, njengengxelo egugile. Ngokuchaseneyo, uya kuphulaphula "imithetho" yakho kwaye ngokukhawuleza uthi uxolo lwenkcubeko okanye uzame ukuwalandela. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abafana abavuma ukudlala ngothando, vele uzonwaba kwinkampani enhle, kwaye ungafumani intombazana ngobusuku obunye. Kakade, bathanda ingqalelo yabesifazane, kodwa iinjongo zabo eziphambili zibonisa ukuzithoba kunye nokuxhatshazwa, kwaye kungezona isondo esilandelayo. Ngoko ke, nabantu abancinci abanjalo abanakukwazi ukudlala ngothando kuphela, kodwa nabo bathethe. Ngokuqhelekileyo, banengqiqo kwaye banengqondo, bayazi kakhulu kwaye baya kuxhasa ngenkxaso intetho ngezihloko ezahlukahlukeneyo. Ngomntu onjalo ujabulise ngokudlala ngothando kunye nokuchitha ixesha, kuba uyazi indlela yokudlala imfesane, kodwa ngaba yinto engathandabuzekiyo kwaye engabonakaliyo, ngoko kunzima kubafazi ukuba bamelane naye. Laba bantu abazange bahambe kuwo wonke umntu ulandelelwano, musa ukuziphatha kakubi kunye neentlanzi, kwaye, nangakumbi kunjalo, musa ukunamathela. Baza kukhokela incoko, jonga, ukumomotheka, kwaye ungaqali ukuba ungcwaba ngomgangatho wokudanisa. Ukuziphatha okunjalo kuyisiphumo salabo abangenalo ingqondo okanye ingcamango, kwaye bajonga bonke abafazi ukuba bafana nje nezilwanyana ezinokulungele ukuba ziqwalaselwe, nangona kunjalo. Ngabantu abanjalo kungcono ukuba bangabandakanyeki kwaye bahlale kude nabo kunokwenzeka. Aba bantu abaqondi ngokupheleleyo ulwimi loluntu, iinkcazo kunye nokwenqaba. Benza nje ukugoba umgca wabo, bangaqapheli nantoni na. Ngoko ke, ukuba awufuni iinkathazo, kungcono ukuba wulezi ukuba akuyi kuba naluphi na unxibelelwano (mhlawumbi nakwindlela eqhelekileyo) kwaye uzama ukuphuma kule nsizwa.

Ukuba iqela eliyingqondi kunye nomntu onobuqili behlangene, kulula ukubonisa udlala ngothando. Uya kukunceda uphumule, uya kuchithachitha kwaye ube nexesha elihle nomntu ontle. Ngamanye amaxesha, kubalulekile ngamnye kuthi. Ukongezelela, ebomini kukho iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zamabali kunye neemeko ezilindileyo ngeenxa zonke. Ngubani owaziyo, kuba kwenzeka ukuba le flirtation elula, ikhule ibe yintando enkulu kunye neyodwa. Kwaye ke, uya kukhumbula ngokukhawuleza ngaloo busuku xa ungazange uvumele enye into kwaye uzibonise njengentombazana engafanelekanga ingqalelo kuphela, kodwa yothando.