Ingxaki yobunxila kwilizwe lethu, kwaye ihlala ingaphendulwanga kwaye iphuthumayo namhlanje. Kwiintsapho ezininzi amadoda aqhubeka esela, kunye nabafazi babo kunye nabantwana ngenxa yoko kuhlupheka nokukhala. Kwaye ke ingxaki yabasetyhini kunye nentsha yobushushu ikhula ngokukhawuleza. Intengiso yentlalo, ekhuluma ngokuphila ngendlela enempilo, ijikeleze enye okanye enye ithelevishini ukusuka kusasa kuze kube sebusuku, kwaye abantu, ngokuqinisekileyo, bayayibukela, kodwa kwiimeko ezininzi kubangelwa ukuba bavelele ubuso babo. Yintoni ongayitshoyo kule meko, kodwa ingxaki yotywala ngokwayo ayiyi kusombululwa, kwaye ukuthengiswa okunjalo akuyi kunceda, ukuba awuzithathi ngentloko kwaye ungathathi amanyathelo okuqhawula umkhwa lo mkhuba.
Ngoxinzelelo lwabo abathembekileyo, kwiimeko ezininzi, iwayini iyawa emagxeni abafazi ngokwabo, abangazi ukuba benzani nomyeni onxilisayo, zama ukusombulula le ngxaki ngama-scandals. Apha unako ngokukhuselekileyo kwaye uqulethe ukuhlambalaza kunye nokuhlambalaza kumyeni wakhe, ozinzile ngokusemthethweni kwintsapho. Ngaphezu koko, abafazi banentlonelo kubayeni babo kwaye kaninzi bazama ukucela kubo into engafanelekanga kwaye ingenakuze ibekezeleleke. Konke oku kunokumtyhola umntu ephoseni, apho eba ngumnxila.
Ukuba indoda isele isele
Yintoni enokuyenza nabayeni abanxilisayo abangaboniyo inonakalo yintsapho yabo kuphela, kodwa nobomi? Ufumaniphi isizathu sokuba ahlale engenakunyamekela ukusela? Yonke le mibuzo iyathuthukisa abaninzi abasetyhini, abanokubambisana nomyeni onjalo. Enyanisweni, kwimeko enjalo ungaya endleleni eyaziwayo kwaye ufune uncedo oluvela kwingcali ezayo eya kunika unyango olulodwa. Kodwa ingxaki yonke kukuba utywala ngokuqhelekileyo luhlobo lwesifo sengqondo ngandlela-thile yendlela kwaye ukuze uphulukiswe kuyo, kubalulekile ukwenza okhethekileyo kwaye ngexesha elifanelekileyo ukufikelela kumntu. Kwaye ezo ndlela zokulwa nendoda njengotywala njengokwenkcenkcesha kotywala, ukuzisola okukhulu, akuncedi kuzo zonke iimeko. Ngendlela eyaziwayo esidlangalaleni zokuphulukisa umyeni ekudakwa, umzekelo, iingceba, akunakunceda kakhulu. Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukwenza konke okusemandleni ukulungisa le ngxaki, ukubeka ubuninzi bezenzo zayo. Kwaye oku kuyimfuneko ukwazi imithetho yokuziphatha eyintloko kunye nomyeni onxilisayo.
Imithetho yokuziphatha nomyeni onxilayo
Kubalulekile ukuqonda le ngxaki. Inkqubo yokubuyisela iqala nomfazi. Umfazi unyanzelekile ukuba abone ingxaki aze adlale kwaye afune naye. Kubalulekile ukuba intombi ikhulume nomyeni wayo (xa ihlambulukile) kwesi sihloko.
Musa ukunyanzelisa iqabane lakho ukuba liphulaphule amabali ngengozi yotywala. Ngokuqhelekileyo bonke abadakayo abanandaba.
Umfazi umele ayeke nayiphi na inkxaso eyongezelelweyo kumyeni wakhe. Ngaphezulu, kunele ukususa izicathulo ezingcolileyo kumyeni obunxilisayo uze umhulele ekulala, makhe afune indlela apho.
Musa ukuthatha uxanduva lomyeni wakho. Makhe acinge ukuba angasiphuza kuye yonke imali okanye ayikho. Kubalulekile ukuba ukhetho lwakhe, kungekhona abafazi. Emva kokuchitha yonke imivuzo ngotywala, umyeni kufuneka aqonde ngokuzimela, okwenziwe kakubi kwaye uye washiya abantu abasondele ngaphandle kwemali. Kule meko, isazela sakhe sinokuqala ukumbandezela.
Umfazi akufanele athathe inxaxheba yomsindisi onamandla onke. Injongo yaso ephambili kukunceda umyeni wakhe ngeendlela zonke kunye nezindlela zokufumana umnqweno wokulahla ukuxhomekeka kotywala kunye nokuzisa lo mnqweno kwisiphumo esihle.
Ungalibali ukuhlala uthi indumiso kumyeni wakhe kuzo zonke izenzo zakhe ezintle. Umzekelo, ubuyele ekhaya ngexesha kunye nokucokisa, - nantsi ke, isizathu esihle sokudumisa.
Ukuba umyeni uphiliswa kulo mlutha, umfazi kufuneka athathe indawo yokuxhomekeka kwento enokuphazamisa. Umzekelo, umdlalo omtsha.
Umfazi kufuneka azitshintshe yena kunye nentsapho yendawo. Ukuqaphela oku kutshintshwa kwintsapho, umntu unokuyeka ukusela. Khumbula, umoya olawulayo kwintsapho unokukunceda ukuba uphinde uxhomekeke ekuxhomekeke kuyo.