Kufana nabantu bonke
Ubungqina bomntu bunokubonakaliswa kwinto yokuba akayenawo uluntu wakho. Oko kukuthi, umzekelo omncinci kakhulu: lonke iqela liphulaphula i-rap, kwaye umfana wakho uphulaphule. Ngenxa yoko, uba ngumphambukeli kwabanye, ngenxa yokuba engabelana nabo ngokuthandayo, ngaphezu koko, uyahlukana. Ngoko ke, ukuba uyaqonda ukuba intando yenkwenkwe yakho ihluke ngokuphawulekayo kwizinto abahlobo bakho bathanda ngayo, ngoko loo nto ayikho into engaqhelekanga. Kuphela nje ukuba ume phakathi kwalabo abathandwayo. Lo mahluko kubangelwa ukungaboni kakuhle, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha unobundlobongela. Incinci inokuhlwaywa ngenxa yokungabi njengabo bonke abantu, ukubeka imilinganiselo yakhe kunye nezinto ezithandayo ekukhanyeni okubi. Kodwa ukuba uyazi ukuba baninzi abantu abanomdla kunye neembono ezifanayo, kufuneka uchazele kubahlobo bakho ukuba kufuneka ucinge ngakumbi. Awukwazi ukugweba umntu ngenxa yokuba akafani nabo. Khumbulani abahlobo bakho ukuba phakathi kwabantu abanjengekwenkwenkwe yakho, baya kubonakala bengaqhelekanga kwaye bengaqondakali. Njengomntwana, le ntlukwano kwizinto ezithandayo kunye neziphatho zikhokelela ekubeni iqhubu elimhlophe lenziwa ngumntwana, lihlambalazwa, libizwa, litsho liyamangalisa. Ngelishwa, ebomini obudala, abanye abantu bayaqhubeka beqhuba. Ukuba kunjalo, ukuba abahlobo abafuni ukuvuma iingxabano kwaye baya kuqhubeka bezingelela, kubalulekile ukucinga ukuba ngubani owenene ngempela, kuba ukugatywa komntu okwehlukile kubantu abaninzi, uthetha kuphela iingxaki zengqondo zabanye abantu abangafuni ukwazi into entsha, ngokuziwayo kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo uyaxhala ukuba umntu uphezulu kunabo, ngoko abafuni ukudibanisa nehlabathi lenene, eligcwele abantu abalifani, ukuthanda, ukhetho kunye nokunye ukungafani phakathi kwabantu d.
Makholwa
Ngokuqhelekileyo abantu baphathwa ngokungabikho kokuqonda kwabo bazinikela ekukholweni. Ukuba umfana wakho ungumkholi, ingakumbi ukuba uyilungu labanye abathiwa yihlelo (amaPentekoste, i-charismatics kunye ne-tadaleye), kunokwenzeka ukuba abahlobo bakho baya kumjonga njengangowesinye. Kwabaninzi, ukholo kuThixo luyinto ekhethekileyo yodwa, apho kungabikho icawa okanye ihlelo. Ngomqondiso ofanayo, abantu abaninzi phakathi kolutsha ngokubanzi banokungathembeki ngonqulo baze bajonge ukuba bangakholelwa kuThixo. Ngokwemvelo, umntu okholelwa kuThixo ngokunyanisekileyo, uya kubonakala engabonakaliyo kubo. Emva kwakho konke, kubazalwana abaninzi abathembekileyo kuThixo, kufana nokholo kwiindalana. Kwaye umntu omdala oqhelekileyo uya ku thembela kwiimbali? Kungenxa yoko, emva kokufunda ukuba iqabane lakho likholwa ngokwenene, bahlobo kwaye liqala ukumphatha njengomntu ongaqhelekanga, ongaqondakaliyo kuluntu. Kodwa ukuziphatha okunjalo kwisabelo sabo akuqhelekanga. Wonke umntu unelungelo lokukholelwa oko akufunayo, ubuncinci kuThixo, nakwiLuka Skywalker. Nangona engabalimazi abanye ngokholo lwakhe kwaye akayinyanzeli, ngokucacileyo akufanelekanga ukugweba loo mntu. Ngoko ke, ukuba uyazi ukuba intombi yakho ayithethi kubahlobo benkolo kwaye akazami ukuguqula ukholo lwakhe, kwimeko enjalo inkampani yakho ayilungile. Nguye oziphatha ngokumangalisayo, ekubeni uqala ukugweba umntu ngenxa yeminqweno yakhe nembono. Mhlawumbi ba thetha ngawe, kuba bayazi ukuba kaninzi kangakanani inxalenye yesibini yamacandelo ahlukeneyo aguqulwa abe yihlelo. Kodwa ukuba wena ngokwakho ubona ukuba loo mntu akafuni ukwenza oku, ukuba unelisekile kwaye uyazi ukuba wonke umntu unelungelo lokukhetha, ngoko abahlobo bakho sele beziphatha njengamahlelo angama-secrete. Bazama ukukholisa umntu ukuba amkhuphe ngaphandle kokholo, amkholise ngazo zonke iindlela aziphosakeleyo, abize ngokungaqhelekanga kuphela kuba abantu abakholelwa njengabo. Kule meko, kufuneka uxoxe ngale ngxaki kunye nabahlobo bakho kwaye uchaze ukuba ubuchule bakho bendoda abukhathalelanga nabani na, kuba akayi kubeka uluvo lwakhe kubo, ngoko ke akufanele bawubambelele ngombono wakhe kubo.
Kodwa ukuba ubona ukuba lo mntu ngokwakhe ubangele ulwalamano olunjalo lwabahlobo, uqala iinkonzo zemithandazo kwindawo ephakamileyo, ubatshitshisa ngamaHyenas of Fire, uhlala ezama ukuguqula, ngoko ke ukuziphatha kwakhe kuya kuthiwa yinto engaqhelekanga. Kule meko, uya kufuna ukuthetha ngqo nekwenkwenkwe yakho. Chaza ukuba wonke umntu unelungelo lokuphila ngendlela aphila ngayo kwaye ukholelwa oko akufunayo. Ngoko ungakhathazeki ngabantu, zama ukunyanzelisa uluvo lwakho uze wenze oko akufunayo. Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba unomdla onomdla kunzima kakhulu ukwakha ubudlelwane ngabazalwana abangakholwayo okanye abo baxhomekeke kunqulo kunabo ngokwabo. Ngoko ke, ukuba uqaphela ukuziphatha okunjalo kwiqabane lakho, usacinga ukucinga ukuba kulungile ukuba sakhe ubuhlobo kunye naye. Emva kwakho konke, ekuqaleni okanye ekuhambeni kwexesha, uya kufuna ukuba aguqulwe ekukholweni. Kwaye ukuba awuyikuyidinga, ubuhlobo bakho buya kuba yinto engapheliyo kunye neengxabano ngokubhekiselele kwimibono eyahlukileyo kwiinkonzo nobomi ngokubanzi.
Ngokungaqhelekanga
Kodwa ngaphandle kweminye imibono kunye neenkolelo, umntu unokuba ngumntu ongaqhelekanga. Yaye iyaba yinto engaqhelekanga ngelixa iqala ukwenza izinto ezingamkelekanga kuluntu, kuba ziphikisana nemigaqo siseko yenkcubeko nokuziphatha. Ngendlela, umntu akafanele adibanise uthando lweentlanzi kunye nolunye amazwe. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba umfana ophikisanayo ugijimela kwibhulukhwe zakhe kunye nokuqhwitha kwiSitolo sonyaka omtsha kwibhotile ye-champagne - ngoko u-joker. Kodwa ukuba umntu onobubele uya emsebenzini, sele kubonakala ngokucacileyo ukuba unobunzima. Ngoko ke, ukuba abahlobo bakho bakuxelela ngokucacileyo imizekelo engaqhelekanga yokuziphatha komfana wakho, ngoko kufuneka uqikelele. Ukuphonononga ngokwenene imeko kwaye uqinisekise ukuba indlela yakhe yokuziphatha iyintlekisa okanye wenza into enyanisekileyo. Kwaye ukuba kunjalo, ngoko kufuneka ucinge malunga nokuba ufuna ukudibana nomfana onjalo, kuba kunokwenzeka ukuba, ukuziphatha kwakhe kukubonakalisa ukuphambuka kwengqondo. Ingxaki yengqondo yintlekele enkulu kunye nomthwalo omkhulu kumntu osondeleyo. Ngoko cinga ngezinto ofunayo kubudlelwane kunye nokuba unako ukunyamezela umntu ongaqhelekanga ubomi bakho bonke, mhlawumbi, kwaye uyiphathe. Ukuba uyaqonda ukuba "ulonwabo" awudingi, kungcono ukuba ushiye, kuba ukungaqondakali okwangoku kwindlela yokuziphatha kunye neminyaka kuya kwanda kuphela, kunye nenkqubela yokugula kwengqondo.