Yiyo esiza kuthetha ngayo kwinqaku lethu "I-Statute yeFund Yithanda Intsapho Yobunye." Mhlawumbi, into ebalulekileyo ebomini kukufezekisa ngokuvisisana kuyo yonke into, kwaye okokuqala, konke, kwintsapho yakho, kuba le nto ibaluleke kakhulu kumntu. Ukuthandana komzimba kwenza ukuba intsapho ihambelane, le ngenye yezinto zokuqala zokubambisana kwintsapho.
Kodwa yintoni uthando lokwenene? Yaye yintoni, iimvakalelo, iimvakalelo okanye zonke izenzo ezifanayo? Ndifuna ukukuxelela malunga nale nkcukacha, ukuze ufumane ukuvumelana xa uthanda. Ngaba uyazi ukuba kutheni ndicinga ukuba uthando aluyiyo imizwa kunye nemizwelo, kodwa izenzo? Kungenxa yokuba xa uthando lwethu lusekelwe kuphela kwimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo, ngoko kuzingca kwaye lolu hlobo luthando lunokukukhokelela ekufeni kwintsapho yakho.
Hlalani nikhumbula ukuba uthando luye lunyamezela, uthando alukhwele, aluqhayisi, alubi. Uthando lokwenene luhlala lulungele ukuzidela ngenxa yolonwabo lomnye umntu. Ukuba ubona ngothando lwakho, ukuzingca, ke ungakhohliswa, oku akuyonto uthando lokwenene kunye nomoya "omncinci" onjalo.
Yilungele ukuhlala uzidela, kwaye uthando olunjalo luya kuzisa uxolo kwintsapho. Kakade, oku kusebenza kumalungu omabini, kokubili kumfazi nakumntu. Kwaye ukuba zombini umfazi kunye nendoda bekulungele ukuzidela ngenxa yomnye, kuya kubambisana ngokwenene, uthando lwangempela omnye komnye.
Ndicinga ukuba uya kuvuma nam ukuba inkokhelo yentsapho yaseRashiya inciphise kakhulu imilinganiselo yayo yokuziphatha. Kwaye ukuba ngaba kungekudala, imitshato ekugqityiweyo kwiminyaka yama-80 isoloko isomeleleyo, ngoko imitshato ephelile kwiminyaka eyi-90 nangaphezulu nangama-2000 inokwakheka kwesigxina kunye nokuqhawula ngokuqhelekileyo.
Apha unako ukuqonda ukuba kutheni le nto iyenzeka, ukhangele kule mizalwane apho abafazi kunye namadoda okanye ubuncinane ilungu elinye lentsapho lizimisele ukuzinikela ngenxa yolonwabo lolunye kunye nokugcinwa kwintliziyo kunye nentuthuzelo, ngoko iintsapho ezinjalo zimi. Kwaye apho sibona isimo sengqondo kwintsapho, masithi, masithi: "Senza intsapho ukuba ndiyithande kunye," kwaye sibona ukuba kukho ukubola okungakumbi kwaye ekugqibeleni ukuqhawula umtshato.
Ekugqibeleni kwam nqaku ndifuna ukuthetha kubo bonke, abo bangayi kudala intsapho, kodwa bavumelane. Asikho isidingo sokubeka, ukugxininiswa okukhethekileyo kwinto ofuna, ukujonga iimfuno zesahlulo sesibini, kunye nesiqingatha sakho sesibini siya kujonga iimfuno zakho kwaye nguwe, kwaye udale ukusebenzisana kwintsapho yakho nobomi.
Zama ukunika uthando olungakumbi kunokuba ufune ukubuyisela. Kwaye khumbula ukuba intsapho ayidlala umdlalo, kodwa umsebenzi omkhulu bobabini, kwaye xa ungena ebomini obutsha, ungangeni kuwo ngokuqonda ukuba unokuqhawula nanini na. Emva koko, ngaba ngubani owakha indlu ucinga ngendlela yokuyichitha? Khangela ikusasa ngokuzonwabisa, kwaye uyakhe ngokuthula nangokuvisisana.
Xa umyeni wakho wexesha elizayo ekunika isipho, mbuze ukuba ulungele ukwakha umtshato okanye konke azimisele ukukuhlawula. Mbuze ukuba ulungele yini ukusebenzisa nje into yokuba uya kuba ngumfazi wakhe (ukucima ukupheka ukuhlambulula), kodwa ukuba ube ngumyeni ozalisekileyo. Thatha iimbopheleleko uze ube yindoda efana nentsapho kwindawo leyo, ekuthiwa yindoda nganye.
Emva koko, inkosi ayiyikuphela kuphela kwaye isebenzise okulungileyo, kodwa isebenza ngoku okuthiwa kuhle. Kwaye amantombazana amnandi abheka ngokugqithiseleyo umbuzo womtshato, kuba isigqibo ngoku uxhomekeke kubomi bakho bonke kwikamva.