Kodwa iintsuku, iiveki, iinyanga zidlule, kodwa akukho. Kwaye kuthiwa "akuyiyo injongo" kubonakala, uyaqonda ukuba akazange alahleke ithuba lokuphumula kwimpilo yobomi bemihla ngemihla aze angene kwiintsuku ezipheleleyo. Yintoni eyammisa? Ukoyika ukutshiswa? Uloyiko lokungalunganga? Kodwa kuphela abo bangenzi nto abazenza iimpazamo! Kwaye bonke abesabhinqa besaba nje ngamaqhinga akhe. Zininzi iingxaki ezivela ebuntwaneni, xa amantombazana akhuliswa ngomoya wokuthozama nokuthobela. Ukulandela oko, intombazana kufuneka ilinde ngokukhawuleza, xa umfana ngokwakhe ebonisa ingqalelo yakhe. Iimveli ngexesha labo, kwakhona, zitsho ukungabikho komsebenzi wesithandabuko kwimeko yokukhetha umntu okhethiweyo. Oku kuye kwenzelwe izihlobo okanye umntu ngokwakhe, kwaye wayemele amkele ukhetho lwabo. Kodwa kwintendelezo yesithathu leminyaka, abafazi banokukhetha amadoda abo. Yaye ukuba ikhona kubo, kufuneka balwe namadoda!
Kukho amadoda anokuqiniseka ukuba iqhinga elihlala lihlala lihlala linamadoda. Bacaphukiswa ngabafazi abanesibindi abanesabi ukuthatha inyathelo. Ukuba, umzekelo, umfazi udla ngokubonakala kwintsimi yombono womntu, zonke iintlanganiso ezingabonakaliyo zifunwa nguye njengenjongo, naluphi na izicelo ezifunyenwe. Kodwa akubona bonke abantu abafana, kukho abo bamkela inxaxheba yabasetyhini. Ba no kukhululeka nangona besaba ukuba banganqatshwa. Amanye amadoda ayesaba ukubonisa ukunganyaniseki aze athi athande xa ibhinqa lithatha isinyathelo sokuqala.
Abanye bathatha indawo yokungathathi hlangothi, bekholelwa ukuba yonke into ixhomekeka kwimeko, kwaye akukho nto ibandakanye nabani na ukuthatha inyathelo lokumelana nokuqala.
Ibhinqa lingazithatha isinyathelo sokuqala, kodwa ngendlela enokuthi le ndoda ikholelwa ukuba iyenayo imeko. Ekubeni abaninzi abantu besaba abantu besifazane abakhutheleyo, besaba ukulahlekelwa ubuso babo besilisa, kubalulekile ukuba benze izinto ezinqabileyo, bengalibali umfanekiso wesini esomeleleyo.
Kubonakala ukuba i-sibini yesithathu yabaziwayo iqalisa nabasetyhini, nangona umntu engayazi ngako. Ngokomzekelo, kwiphathi, ibhinqa yenza umntu eze kwaye athethe naye esebenzisa "izibonakaliso ezingenanto zokukhohlisa." Unako ukumomotheka ngokubanzi, ukuphosa kuye ukujonga ngokukhawuleza kodwa okuchanekileyo, ukudanisa kumculo wedwa, kumjonga ukuba atyathele iinwele zakhe okanye azibeke ngokwakho kunye nokunye okuninzi.
Indlela yokufumana amadoda ukuba athathe isinyathelo sokuqala ekuthandweni sele sele eqondakala kakhulu. Ibhinqa libonisa indoda ngomdla wayo kuye, kwaye naye uqala ukuthatha inyathelo elisebenzayo. Ngaba unokuyichukumisa umntu ukuba enze isigqibo malunga nomtshato? Emva koko, behlala ndawonye njengabantu abangahlali, abaninzi abantu bazibona bebodwa, kanti abafazi bajonga ukuba batshatile. Ziziphatha ngokufanelekileyo. Oku kwenzeka nje ukuba amadoda akafuni ukuthatha isinyathelo sokuqala, kwaye abavumelanga ukwenza izigqibo kubo. Kulo mzekelo, umsebenzi wesifazane okhaliphile-ukukhokelela umntu kwisigqibo malunga nomtshato, kwaye ngoko wayecinga ukuba isigqibo sokutshata naye.
Musa ukumkhathaza njengeqabunga lokuhlamba, kodwa kunokuba umnike inkululeko eyaneleyo. Ukuba wayenethuba lokuchitha ixesha kunye nabahlobo, bazibandakanya zabo. Akufanele abe nevakalelo lokuba ngeendlebe zokuhamba kukaMendelssohn inkululeko yakhe iya kugqiba, kwaye uya kuwela ebukhosini obungunaphakade. Akuyimfuneko ukukhawuleza iziganeko kwaye ngokukhethekileyo ukummangalela - "ungatshati, ndiya kwesinye." Indoda eqhutywa kwikhonkco inokushiya ngokupheleleyo. Ukuba uhlala uguqa "Ndifuna umtshato, ndifuna umnqamlezo kunye ne-limousine", kulula ukufumana idumela lokuzala. Kodwa abantu bathanda imiphunga ngokunyuka, ukuvuya kunye nokungabonakali kwabasetyhini.
Ukuzama ukukhulelwa nokuyibopha xa umntwana engakwazi ukuyenza nayiphi na indlela. Abantwana ababopheli umntu oye wagqiba ekubeni ashiye, mhlawumbi abe ngumtshato osemthethweni, ungakhankanyi ngoluntu. Musa ukuthenga indoda. Xa uthe abazali bakho bathembisa ukukunika indlu okanye imoto yomtshato, awuyi kufeza nantoni na. Oku kwahlukileyo kunokunqumla indoda ngomqondo wesithunzi. Kodwa uAlfonso, ngokuchaseneyo kuya kuba mnandi, kodwa uyayidinga?
Zama ubuncinane kwezinye iinkalo ukuba zingenakulungiswa kuyo. Ukuba wayesazi ukuba kule nto unokuthembela kuyo, ukuba uya kwenza konke kakuhle kwaye ujabule. Mkholise ukuba uyamqonda njengomnye. Nguwe kuphela obona ukuba unet talente, uthembisa, uyabulumko. Umsebenzi wakho awuyikumdumisa, ukuziqhayisa, kodwa ukugxininisa ngokwakho-enye kunye kuphela.
Unobtrusively ukubonisa ukuba amadoda emtshatweni ayengaphantsi, kodwa kaninzi, uyavuya ngakumbi. Yithi la manani abonisa ukuba amadoda asetshati ahlala ixesha elide. Mhlawumbi unyamekele impilo yakhe iya kumenza acinge.
Ngokuqhelekileyo kubone iifilimu malunga nexabiso leentsapho. Ukuze uqiniseke nge sibini esonwabileyo, iqela lezingane, inja kunye nendlu enhle. Unokumemeza ukuba oku kupholile, kwaye uphupha ngalo ukususela ebuntwaneni. Akufuneki ukuba uthethe ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwi-movie.
Ngaphambi kokuba uchukumise umntu ukuba acinge ngomtshato, cinga ngesizathu sokuba yena ngokwakhe akazange akhule. Mhlawumbi akabonanga kuwe umfazi ofuna ukuchitha ubomi bakhe bonke. Ukuba oku kunjalo, ngaba ufuna umtshato nomntu onjalo? Emva kokuyifumanisa kanye ngesinye isigqibo, ngaba awuyi kuqhubeka nokukwenza oku kwimiba enoxanduva? Ngaba unyulo wakho unako ukufumana nayiphi na uxanduva kwabanye? Mhlawumbi kuya kuba lula ukushiya olu lwalamano kwaye uzama ukwakha amatsha? Kungakhathaliseki ukuba kutheni uzibuze indlela yokufumana indoda ukuba ithathe isinyathelo sokuqala, Into ephambili kukuba le nto ayiphenduli ngokwayo, kodwa ikhokelela ekudibaneni ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu ababini abanothando.