Ngokukhawuleza umntwana onemikhwa emibi uvela kwigumbi lokufundela kwaye umoya uguquke ngokukhawuleza. Ngabo aba bantwana bazama ukuzimisela, kodwa ngenxa yeendleko zabanye, oko kukukhubekisa okanye ukuhlazisa umntu, ukulungelelanisa abantwana kunye. Kule meko, abo bafundi ofunda nabo abanomdla kakhulu kwaye abangaqhelekanga kubundlobongela. Ngoko ke, xa abazali bezisa abantwana babo kwiklasi yokuqala, bafanele baqaphele okokuqala, de baqhelane nabo bonke abantwana. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba abazali bacinga ukuba umntwana wabo unokuba nengxaki kunye noontanga bakhe, kukulungele ukuba nencoko yengqondo kunye naye kwaye umlungiselele nayiphi na imeko. Ngale ndlela umntwana angayiqonda indlela yokuphuma ngokufanelekileyo nesimo esivela kwimeko yangoku. Kakade, ayikho imfihlo kunoma ubani na ukuba kukho iimbambano. Akunjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi iimfuno zabantu zibambisana, ngoko ke kuyimfuneko ukunyanga ngokuzinzileyo kwaye kungekudala ukuxabana kwaye uzame ukuseka ubudlelwane ngaphandle kokugqithiswa kweengxabano. Awukwazi ukuthanda wonke umntu, bonke bayaziqonda ngokupheleleyo. Ngoko ke, abantu abadala kufuneka baxelele umntwana ukuba akuyimfuneko ukuba wonke umntu amthande, umntu kwaye angamthandi.
Kwaye into ebaluleke kakhulu kukumangalisa umntwana ukuze bangazami ukuzuza inhlonipho kubantwana ngabaphathi ngokusebenzisa izipho. Umntwana kufuneka akwazi ukuzimela aze azi ukuba akukho mfuneko yokunikezela. Enye yeendlela ezikhethileyo kukuba nolwalamano olulinganayo nomntu wonke. Ngako oko, kungcono ukungaxhasi ihlangothi lomntu kwiingxabano. Oku kungenziwa ngokuqulunqa nayiphi na isizathu. Ukuba umntwana uhlala ephikisana noontanga, ngaba abazali mabaxelele utitshala malunga neengxaki zomntwana wabo. Kubalulekile ukuqinisekisa ukuba umntwana akafani neontanga zabo. Ukuba umntwana akanalo ulwalamano, ngoko unokuzama ukukwenza kubazali. Kukho abantwana abangenakunyaniseki, kwimeko enjalo, abazali kufuneka bancede umntwana. Ngamanye amaxesha bathi abantu abadala akufanele baphazamise ubudlelwane babantwana, kuba bona ngokwabo bafanele bazisombulule iingxaki zabo. Oku akuvunyelwanga kuzo zonke iimeko.
Okokuqala, umntwana kufuneka ahlale enenkxaso kubantu abadala. Kwaye kubalulekile ukuba abantwana babelane nabazali babo. Abazali baya kuhlala bezolile, ukuba baye baba ngumkhwa. Nangona umntwana engavumeli abantu abadala ukuba bangenelele kule meko, omnye unokubonisa ukuba uhamba njani ngokuchanekileyo. Bonke abazali bamakhwenkwe bafuna ukuba abantwana babo bazimelele, nokuba ngaba kuyimfuneko kunye kunye noncedo lokulala. Ungathumela abafana kumacandelo ezemidlalo ukuze bakwazi ukuzikhusela. Kukho iintlobo ezininzi zobudlelwane kwiqela lezingane:
1. ukungahoywa;
2. ukulahlwa
3. ukulahlwa ngokukodwa;
4. intshutshiso.
Umzekelo, umntwana akahlawulwa nayiphi na ingqalelo, kuba ayikho nhlobo. Akanikezwa naluphi na indima, ayithathi nayiphi na imidlalo kwaye lo mntwana akayithandabuzeki kunoma ubani. Umntwana akazi iinombolo zefowuni zabantwana afunda nabo, akukho namnye wabahlobo bakhe abamemelayo ukutyelela. Kwaye ekhaya akathethi nantoni na kwaye akayi kuthetha igama malunga nesikolo sakhe.
Abazali bafuna ukuthetha notitshala kwaye bazame ukuseka ubudlelwane nabantwana, ukwenza umntwana wabo athole abahlobo. Kukho nawa maxesha xa afunda nabo befuna ukuhlala kwideskiti enye, abafuni ukuba kwiqela lezemidlalo elifanayo, ngoko lo mntwana akafuni ukuya esikolweni, kwaye ukusuka kwigumbi lokufundela kwavela kwimeko embi. Abazali bazama ukunceda abantwana babo. Zama ukudlulisela abantwana kwelinye iklasi okanye nakwezinye izikolo, zama ukubonisa imeko kumfundisi, unokukwazi ukubuyela kwesazi sengqondo.
Kukho iimeko xa abantwana behlala bexutywa, bebizwa, bahlala behlekisiwe. Kwanokubetha, kunokuthatha kunye nokuphanga izinto zabo. Abantwana bavame ukuhamba ngemivimbo, i-sadins, banokulahlekelwa yimali. Le ngxaki ebaluleke kakhulu efuna ukujongiswa ukuze abantwana bangabandakanywa kwiqela. Abazali banokuya kwi-psychologist baxoxe ngale ngxaki. Abantwana bonke bathatha intliziyo kwaye kulula ukucaphukisa, ngoko ke kufuneka ukwazi ukukhusela. Ngoku uyazi indlela yokufundisa inkwenkwe ukulungisa iingxabano kwiqela.