Izizathu zokuzithemba.
Izizathu zokubangela ukuba umntu ngokukhawuleza anqabe ukuthembela kuye, oko kukuthi, ininzi. Okokuqala, uxinzelelo.
Sifumene noxinzelelo phantse yonke imihla, kwaye ubomi obuninzi obusenza sibaqhuba, amathuba amaninzi ukuba iimeko ezixinzelelekileyo ziya kufumana kwisigaba esinye. Ezinye izinto ezinokumangalisa zinokuthi zidibanise kakhulu amandla, umzekelo, iingxaki ezingalindelekanga emsebenzini, ukuxabana nomntu osondeleyo, ukuhlambalaza ngaphandle kwesizathu okanye nayiphi na into. Oku kusenza sikholelwe ukuba, mhlawumbi, thina ngokwethu sinokugxeka iingxaki, kwaye ityala liyathonya kakhulu ukuzithemba. Siyicinga ukuba asikwazi ukulawula imeko, apho iimvakalelo eziphazamisayo zisenza ngathi njengebhola lebhola.
Esinye isizathu esiqhelekileyo sokuzithemba ngamathambo sisuka ebuntwaneni. Ngamanye amaxesha abazali bazinikela ngokuzithandela okanye bengazibopheli ngokungathandabuzeki umntwana ukuba akanako nayiphi na into. Khumbula oku: "ungumntu omkhulu!", "Bonke abantwana sele beyazi indlela, omnye wena ...", "kuphela wena unqabile"? Zonke ezi zinjalo zigcinwa kwimemori, kwaye umntwana akafundi ukuba kuyimfuneko ukuba abe ngongqiqo, onobuqili kwaye othobelayo, kodwa ukuba akaze athande kakuhle njengabanye abantwana babantu ngokungafani nomama. Ngobudala, ngokuqinisekileyo, oku kulibalekile, kodwa kusekho ukungazithembi, nangona kungelula ukufumana isizathu esiqinisekileyo sokungaqiniseki.
Ngamanye amaxesha umntu ulahlekelwa ukuzithemba ngamakhono akhe, ngenxa yesiphakamiso sakhe. Udinga ukwazi ukuba ukwesaba utshintsho, ingozi, iintloni okanye iintloni ziqhelekileyo. Abanye abantu baqala ukuzihlambalaza ngenxa yokuvalelwa, kwaye njengoko uyazi, ukuba uzikhumbuza ixesha elide, kuya kuzaliseka. Yiyo ndlela esizuza ngayo iimpawu ezintsha, kunye nokungaqiniseki ngenye yazo.
Indlela yokujongana nokungaqiniseki?
Okokuqala, kufuneka ukwazi ukuba umntu othembekileyo akayena umntu obonakala egabisayo, ozikhukhumezayo okanye ngenye indlela. Ukuzithemba kuboniswa kwinto yokuba umntu akucingi nje ngombuzo othile okanye imeko. Ukuzithemba kukuthi xa uvakalelwa ngenxa yesizathu esithile ungayi kuhamba kunye nokuba udibanise okanye uyaphonsa - wenza nje oko ucinga ukuba kuyimfuneko ngaphandle kokwesaba nokungathandabuzeki. Yiyo ukuzithemba okwenene.
Ukuzithemba akuzange kulahleke kwindawo ethile, apho ingafunyanwa, ithathwe kwaye ifakwe endaweni. Ukufezekisa ukuba ukungathandabuzeki akuphazamanga nokuphila akuzange kuphazamise umgangatho wobomi kunokuphela kwendlela - ukwenza izinto ezichasene nazo. Umqobo wokuqala kunye neyona nto ibalulekileyo ekuthintela ukufikelela ekujoliswe kuyo kukuba ukwesaba ukungaphumeleli. Kodwa kufuneka ukwazi ukuba kuphela abo bangenzi iimpazamo abaphosakeleyo. Akukho ukuhluleka kuya kubonakalisa ukuzithemba xa uqinisekile ukuba wenze konke okusemandleni ukuze uphumelele .
Ukuzithemba kwakho akufanele kuxhomekeke kwizinto zangaphandle. Ngoko ke ugweme ukuhlolwa kweempawu zakho nezenzo zakho, ungasebenzisi iilebhile ezinjengokuthi "Andikwazi ukwenza oku, ngoko ndiyiphumeleli", "andiyiqondi indlela esebenza ngayo, ngoko ndiyisidenge." Oku kuya kunzima kuphela imeko.
Zithokoze ngenxa yento yonke encinci yokuphumelela, zama ukukhumbula kuphela. Kule meko, emva kwexeshana awukwazi ukuyibiza ngokuchanekileyo. Inqaku elibalulekileyo kukunika ilungelo lokwenza impazamo nangayiphi na imeko. Xa unesiqiniseko sokuba unako ukujamelana nobunzima, kwimeko apho ukusilela kwakho akuyi kuba yinto ebalulekileyo. Kwaye kubaluleke nje ukuba ungayishiyi inyathelo, kungabi ukhetha indlela yokuphila engabonakaliyo, apho kuxhomekeke khona. Ixesha elifutshane, iinzame, kunye nokuzithemba kuya kubuya, ngenxa yento ecacileyo - unako ukubaninzi, kunokuba ucinga ukuza kutshanje.