Ngokwezizathu zeengqondo zengqondo, ezininzi izibini apho ukuziphatha okunjalo kungekulo mtsha, kubandakanya ukuxhomekeka kwengqondo kunamandla komnye nomnye. Ngokufutshane, kwimeko enjalo, indoda, njengommiselo, kuxhomekeke kumfazi wayo, uvakalelwa (okanye ahlale engaqondi) ukuxhomekeka kwalo, uzive engenamandla kulo mbandela kwaye uyasombulula umbuzo wokungaziphathi kakuhle kwindlela yokuqala, ezama ukubonakalisa ubukhulu bakhe kunye nokunika amandla . Ixhoba, ngokuzama, ukuzama ukuzikhusela, kudla ngokubangela esinye isiganeko. Ukuba ayifuni, umtyholi ufumana esinye isizathu kwaye uqala. Ubonakaliso obaluleke kakhulu bobukho bexhomekeka kwengqondo yowesifazane kukuba emva kokuhamba kwakhe "ngonaphakade", uya kubuya kwakhona, ukuthenga izibongozo kunye nokuncenga kweqabane lakhe elilahliwe. Ngethuba ngexesha lokubuyela kwakhe, wayenethuba lokuba ngaphandle kwakhe, kokubili ngemali nangokwenyama. Ezi zibini zihlala kule ndlela kwiminyaka emininzi kwaye, njengommiselo, musa ukudibanisa. Kwaye bahlula - bahlanganiswa kwakhona. Yintoni enokuyenza kubantu abangenabo "banenhlanhla", abafazi abangenalo ukuxhomekeka kwengqondo ngokuqinileyo kubaxhasi babo kwaye banqwenela ukulahla indlela enjalo yobomi.
Masizame ukuqwalasela izinto ezimbini: okokuqala - xa ubundlobongela bubonakalisa ubudlelwane babantu abaselula, apho intombazana ephakamisa isandla sakhe, engakangenanga nolwalamano olwaneleyo kwaye engenabantwana, kwaye okwesibini - xa ubundlobongela buvela kwintsapho ekhoyo. Kuzo zombini iimeko, impendulo enye-ukuhlukana nobudlelwane ngendlela engenabubele. Kwiimeko ezi zimbini, imeko yeengcambu ayikude. Ukuba kwimeko yokuqala, i-gap ingaba lula, ngoko kwesibili akulula.
Izizathu eziphambili zokulibaziseka kwi-gap: ukwesaba kowesifazane, ukuba umntu uyethusa; ukungakwazi ukuxazulula ingxaki yezindlu; ubukho babantwana abadibeneyo; kwaye, ekugqibeleni, ukunyaniseka kwendoda eyenza ibhinqa ikholelwa ukuba "eli lixesha lokugqibela." Kwimeko apho loo ntokazi isatshiswa, okanye ngenye indlela, uyamthanda umxhaphazi okanye ihlaziye abantwana abangakwazi ukuhlala bengenawo uyise - le ngxaki yowesifazane, ngokuqhelekileyo kufuneka ahlangabezane naye. Ukwenza oku, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba umzekelo wobawo ophakamisa isandla kunina umzekelo ombi kakhulu, kwaye unakho ukuphindaphinda ebomini bentsapho yabantwana ngokwabo. Ukulondolozwa koyise kwintsapho akusizathu sokuzidela. Kumele kukhunjulwe ukuba ukubetha kukaMama kungumngcipheko weengqondo kumntwana, ochaphazela kokuzimela kwakhe kunye nesimo sengqondo sakhe sengqondo. Ngokutsho kwedatha yenkcazo, phakathi kwababulali abancinci - abaninzi banetyala lokubulawa kwabantu, abahlekisiwe ngabomama. Kwakhona kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba inceba ayiyiyo inketho, ukukhumbula ukuba umxhaphazi, xa echaphazela isandla phezu komfazi, akazange abe nesihawu. Kuya kuba nzima kowesifazane ukuba akwazi ukujamelana noyiko lwendoda ukuba wayesongela yena okanye abantwana bakhe. Uloyiko luncedo olukhulu lokungeniswa. Kule mfuneko kuyimfuneko ukulinganisela - indlela enoba yintoni ingongoma yomtyholi, kwaye yintoni ekufuneka yenziwe ukwenzela ukuba ayikwazi ukuzaliseka. Ukuba kukho indlela yokuzikhusela kwaye kukho abantwana, kufuneka usebenze. Ngaloo mphahla, kunye nakwiimeko zokuxhomekeka kwemali kwindoda yomshushisi, ibhinqa liya kufuna uncedo oluvela ngaphandle. Ingaba inkxaso yabazali, abahlobo, izalamane, nabani na, ukuba oko kuphela ekuncedeni. Nangona kunjalo, ibhinqa ekuphumeni kwayo imeko iya kufuna amandla amakhulu kunye nesibindi. Unokuncedwa ngumfuno wokunyamekela abantwana bakhe, imfuno yokuzikhusela kwintlanzi yobundlobongela basekhaya.
Kwakhona, akufanele sikhohlwe ukuba kwiimeko ezininzi abafazi bayaqonda yonke into, kodwa bayenqaba ukuthatha izinyathelo ezinqwenelekayo ngenxa yokwesaba "ukuthatha ilinen ecocekileyo ngaphandle kwendlu," ngenxa yokuba "abanye baya kukwazi malunga nalo", abahlobo, amantombazana kunye nebali alinakongeza kuye, xa umntu ephakamisa isandla sakhe. Bafihla kwivakalelo. Ezi mvakalelo kufuneka zitshintshwe ngokukhawuleza kwi-bud, ngenxa yokuba loo ntloni iyadlula kuphela xa le ndoda ichithwa ngokupheleleyo, imeko iqala ukuhamba ngaphaya kweso sikhokelo esinokwenzeka kwaye umbuzo awusekho ngempilo, kodwa malunga nobomi bowesifazane. Kuphela xa ixhoba, njengoko lithethayo, lithwala imilenze yakhe, libala ngeentloni kunye nokwesaba ngenxa yodumo lwakhe kunye nodumo lwakhe lweentsapho. Ngenxa yoko, akufanelekanga ukulinda.
Ndiza kwandisa kwimiba - ngokubhekisele kwikamva leqhawulo-mtshato, ibhinqa kufuneka lirekhode konke ukubetha okubhaliweyo-ukuya koogqirha uze usebenze kumapolisa. Kwixesha elizayo, ukuba umntu omncinane uzama ukutshiza ingubo yakhe kwicala lokuqhawula umtshato xa enquma ukuba ngubani ohlala naye nabantwana, amaxwebhu anjalo anokunceda inkosikazi inkonzo enhle.