Abantu abathandekayo akuvumelekanga ukuvumela iimvakalelo ukuba zibulale le ntliziyo - Uthando! Akukho mntu ukhuselekile kwiingxabano emhlabeni, ngoko ke wonke umntu kufuneka azi indlela yokwakha ubudlelwane emva kokuxabana nomntu othandekayo. Singabalimi bomi bethu, kwaye ukuba sifuna ukutshabalalisa yonke into, siya kuyenza lula, kodwa kuya kuba nzima kakhulu ukubuyisela yonke into.
Ukuze kuphephe ukuxabana, nayiphi na ingxabano, kubalulekile ukufumanisa isizathu sazo zonke ukungaqondani, ngoko ke siya kuqonda indlela yokuseka ubudlelwane emva kokuxabana.
Kufuneka uhlale uthetha intliziyo ngentliziyo, awukwazi ukugcina yonke into yakho. Emva kwakho konke, xa kungalunganga kuthi, ukusuka nasiphi na isenzo somthandayo, simele simxelele oku, musa ukuzigcina kuthi. Akunjalo na kwenzeka ukuba izihlamba esizidlayo, zisitshela nje kuphela kunye nolwalamano lwethu. Wonke umntu, ngokuqinisekileyo wonke umntu kulo mhlaba, kufuneka azi ukuba ekugqibeleni nayiphi na ingxabano kufuneka ukuba ikhawuleze kungekhona, ingabangela ukukhathazeka. Ukuxolelana, kungekhona ukufihla izikhalazo.
Ukuba uyayiqonda ukuba isisombululo, kunokukhokelela ulwalamano lwakho kumbambano, ungayichitha ixesha kulo kwaye into ebaluleke kakhulu yintliziyo.
Kodwa ukuba ubona ukuba isizathu sinzulu. Ungalondolozi ngokwakho, musa ukulibazisa ngomso. Ukuqaphela ukuba incoko iya kukukhokelela ekuxabaneni, ziqonde oko nifuna ntoni kule ngxoxo, oko ungayenqaba, into onokuyinika ukuze ukhulise ubudlelwane, oko kufuneka iqabane lakho liqonde, into enyame ukuyinyamezela kule ngxabano.
Kwaye umele uhlale ekhumbula - evezela umsindo, awuyi kufika into enhle. Ngomsindo, akusayi kuba noxolelaniso. Ukuba olu lamano lubiza kakhulu, awufuni ukulahlekelwa ngumthandayo. Ungathethi nto ishushu. Ungaze ukhumbule iimpazamo ezidlulileyo, ungaqhathanisi nabahlobo, abasebenzisana nabo, ngokubanzi nabani na. Ngokuqinisekileyo, wonke umntu uyazi ubuthathaka babathandekayo babo, kodwa awunakuze uwabethe, awukwazi ukuxolelwa. Ngenxa yokuba umntu uya kuthatha njengokungcatsha, kuba uthembele kuwe, kwaye usebenzise ukuzithemba kwakhe. Musa ukwenza iimpazamo.
Impazamo ephosakeleyo kakhulu yamabini amaninzi kukuba ngexesha lokuphikisana abathi "Ndikushiya," ngokwenene kwiimeko ezinje, abaninzi abayichasayo. Ngenxa yokuxabana, ngenxa yokungaqondi kakuhle, kuba bazivakalela, okanye ubeka ityala. Emva kweengxelo ezinjalo, umntu uqala ukucinga malunga nokwahlukana njengesisombululo kwingxabano. Musa ukuqumbisa ukuba ufuna ukuxolelana.
Ungaze ubeke ii-ultimatums, musa ukuzithiba. Akunakwenzeka ukuba oku kuya kunceda ukuxolelana.
Musa ukucaphukisa, musa ukucasula omnye nomnye. Ukusebenzisa amagama ahlambalazayo ngomntu othandekayo, uyamcaphukisa, abuye aphephe kuwe njenge-boomerang.
Uze ungesabi, unganqikazi ukuya kuqala kwintanda yakho. Into ephambili kukuseka ubudlelwane emva kokuxabana!
Xa ulivile ilizwi elibi elibhekiswe kuwe, ungazami ukwenza ukuba buhlungu ngakumbi, yithi nje akukuvuyisi ukuba uvale lo mthandayo. Zama ukucacisa ukuba uyaqonda yonke into, kodwa kukho enye kodwa ayikufanelanga. Thetha amanye amabinzana athi: "Ndiya kukuhlonela, ndiyayihlonela ingcamango yakho, kodwa", "kuthi kuthi kube ngcono ukuba ngaba." Zonke ezi ntetho zithetha ukuba uyaziqonda ukuba unxibelelwano wakho, ubonisa ukuba ulungele ukuthetha, ulungele ukulungisa ingxaki.
Khumbula, ngokukhawuleza uxolelana, ngokukhawuleza emphefumlweni wakho kuya kulawula ukuzola.
Kodwa ukuba akukho nto inceda, ke isisombululo kuphela kwisingxaki.
Futhi ungalokothi unganqikaze ukuthatha inyathelo ekuxolelaneni. Ngaphandle koko ungalahlekelwa ngumhlobo wakho.
Into ebaluleke kakhulu kukuseka ubudlelwane emva kokuxabana! Ngenxa yoko, emva kokuxolelana, kubalulekile ukudibanisa umphumo. Ukunceda izipho, inkumbulo, amagama malunga nothando, ububele, kufuneka umvumele umntu azi ukuba ubaluleke kakhulu kuwe kwaye uthanda kakhulu kuwe.
Ukuba ukuxabana kwakhokelela ekubeni loo nto iqabane lakho lingalivumi ukukubona ungayifuni, zama ukubhala amagama ngothando phambi kwendlu kwi-asphalt, ukusasazwa ngamagama kunye nothando kunye nokuxolelwa kwirediyo, xelela lonke ilizwe ukuba umthandayo uthatha ininzi ubomi bakho, udumise. Kwaye okubaluleke kakhulu, ungesabi, kuba into ebaluleke kakhulu kukuba kunye.
Ungalokothi ukhohlwe ukuba kuyinto enhle ukunyamezela, kwaye emva kwenkqantosi ngumzuzu onomdla wokonwaba, ulonwabo lokwenene, imizuzu ebonisa abathandekayo, ukuba bathande kangakanani.
Thetha omnye nomnye. Uthando, xabisa, nihlonelane. Qonda, lakho iqabane libonisa. Ufuna ukuguqula, utshintshe wena.
Thandanani kwaye musa ukuzivumela wena kunye nabathandekayo bakho benze iimpazamo ezingakhokelela ekulahlekelweni komntu othandekayo.