Indlela yokwakha ubudlelwane nomntu omncinane kunako?

Ngexesha lethu akukho miqobo. Ngoku abafazi bayakha ubudlelwane kungekudala kuphela amadoda asemdala kunabo, okanye omnye oneminyaka elilodwa ubudala, kodwa kunye nalabo abaselula kunabo. Izinkanyezi ezininzi zase-Hollywood okanye iinkwenkwezi zethu zasekhaya zikhetha amadoda amancinane kunabo. Bathanda ubutsha babo, amandla abo kunye neemvakalelo zabo. Kwaye ngocansi basebenze kakhulu kunamadoda angama-middle age. Abantu abazungezile bajonge ngokuqhelekileyo.

Siza kuqonda ukuba luhlobo luni lolwalamano onokwakha kunye nomntu omdala kunani. Kwaye siya kufumana ukuphuma okuya kunceda ukunqoba izithintelo abanye abakulungele zona.

Ulwalamano noontanga luyakhumbula ukuba ubuhlobo nomntu buncinane kangakanani. Kukho amabhinqa akulungele ukunika uthando, ukunyanzelisa nokunyamekela indoda. Baya kuthiwa "ngumama" kumntu. Abafunanga nto kumntu, banikela kuphela. Kwaye abo bafazi abafuna nje ukutshata, abanandaba nabancinane okanye abadala.

Amadoda abancinci kunabesetyhini asebenzayo kwaye anqwenela ukufikelela eziphakamileyo, okanye azinzileyo kwaye azinalo iinjongo ezithile. La madoda awanamkela umfazi omdala kunabo, awanalo nto, ayengenangqiqo kwaye ayengagqithwanga. Kodwa kukho na madoda ajonga abafazi abasebancinci kunabo ngokwabo okanye abaneminyaka efanayo kunye nabangenanto, kwaye ngokuvuthiweyo bafumana abafazi abanolwazi, abanokuzithemba.

Ubudlelwane nomntu omncinci kunokuba nawe uncedo. Kulula ukulawula, fundisa yonke into ofuna ukuyibona kuyo. Bangakwazi "ukutyhila" indoda efanelekileyo kuwe. Kulo dlelwane, ungumkhokeli kwaye unokwenza nantoni na. Amadoda anjalo ayenakho amava ebomini, kwaye nabo uqala ukuphinda ubutsha. Uza kuphila. Ndiyabulela amandla abo amancinci, uphefumula ubomi obutsha.

Kwaye ukuhlaselwa kolwalamano olunjalo kukuba kufuneka bachithe amandla amaninzi. Imeko yakho yempahla iya kulahleka. Ubudlelwane kunye namadoda anqabile ukuba afumane umtshato okanye ulwalamano olunzulu. Bafuna ingqwalasela eninzi kwinqanaba lakho, kwakhona kufuneka uhambisane nabo. Kwaye, ke, abantu abakujikelezile baya kulwa nolwalamano lwakho namadoda anjalo.

Ukuba kunjalo, wanquma ukufumana umthandi omncinane okanye unqume ukwakha ubudlelwane naye, uze uncede ukuba "eme phambi kweenyawo zakhe". Ukuba unabo bahlobo, phakathi kwabo abemi bafazi, yenza njalo ukuze bangabikho. Thabatha abakhuphiswano. Kuye unako ukuphumla ngokukhululekile, uthele emphakathini wakhe. Ungalokothi ugxininise kwixesha lakhe, njengoko oku kungamcaphukisa. Emva kwakho konke, akayena onjengoko unjani, ufunda nje. Makhe azive ngathi ungumntu wokwenene, inkokeli ebuhlotsheni bakho.

Ukuba uyamthanda umntu wakho ngokwenene, ngoko akufanele uhlangabezane nayiphi na imiqobo kwaye kungakhathaliseki ukuba usemncinci, okanye umdala, into ebalulekileyo kukuba uthando nokuqonda.