Uyeke ukuzonwabisa kwinqutyana yakho ye-TV oyintandokazi, into entsha okanye i-dinner edibeneyo kwindawo yokutyela ebiza kakhulu? Ngaba usabela njani kuzo zonke iintlonelo zabahlobo ngokumomotheka okudandathekileyo? Iveki ezayo ayibangeli uvuyo? Yonke into enjengeyokuba ubanjwe "intsholongwane" ye-oldonia: eli lizwi kwi-psychology elifuna ukunciphisa ubuchule bokunandipha ubomi.
Ngendlela, le nto ayingaziwayo ukudandatheka okwakwaziwayo, xa yonke into idityaniswe ngokupheleleyo kwiitoni ezimnyama, kunye neendudumo zamafu zibonwa ngokugqithiseleyo. Kule meko, kwakungekho ebomvu elimnyama, kodwa lumnyama. Yiwu kuwe ngenxa yezi zizathu!
Isizathu esinye: eto!
Iphupha lakho eliqhubekayo lokufumana elifanelekileyo, njengomthetho, likhokelela ekudumiseni. Kwaye "uyabetha" njengeentlanzi eqhankqalazweni "uzama ukutshintsha into ukuze ulungele ubuncinane into ethile ekude nomfanekiso okhanga.
Ukuxilongwa : "ingqolowa" yolonwabo.
Iimpawu : "Ncinane, ncinane nje!"
Isizathu esiyinhloko, esibizwa ngokuba, singonwabi wena ngokwakho: abagqibeleleyo abanandipha ubomi abakho. Xa uzama ukuphoyisa ulonwabo lwakho ukukhanya, umphefumlo wakho uqokelela ukunganeliseki kunye nokukhathala. Ngenxa yoko, onke amaziko okuzonwabisa aphelile, kwaye ngexesha elifanayo, kungekhona nje isakhiwo esihle, kodwa sinomdla wobomi.
Unyango : Fumana iparadesi elahlekileyo (apho yonke into kunye nayo yonke into yayigqibelele), abaninzi abantu bazama ukululalisa okungaphezulu kweminyaka elishumi. Kodwa konke akuphumelelanga. Musa ukuchitha amandla akho kuwo! Makhe sikuxelele imfihlelo, sisondele kwiqabane elifanelekileyo (ngokukhawuleza unenhlanhla ngokwaneleyo ukuqonda eli phupha), uya kukhwankqisa!
Isizathu sesibini: zonke iintiti !
Usoloko ucinga ukuba ngokuba ngumntu ophumelelayo, uzalisekise onke amaphupha akho abantwana. Kwaye ngoku uzalisekile kwaye ngoku uyenjani? Indlela yokuhlala kuyo kwaye ufumana phi intsingiselo entsha?
Ukuxilongwa : "itetanus" ekuphambili kwempumelelo.
Iimpawu : "Kwenzeka njani, oko konke?"
Wonke amaphupha abantwana kufuneka aphunyezwe ngokukhawuleza: afumaneke kakhulu kwaye akhonkce. Kodwa kwimeko apho "i-jeep enkulu ebomnyama" igxininisa phambi kwendlu (ukhetho: uBarbie noKen banendlu epholileyo yododo), yintoni enye onokuyiphupha ngayo? Ukuba umntu uhlala ekhulelwe ngengqondo, kuba nzima kakhulu ukuba amkele iminqweno emitsha. Apha wena nemiphumo yolu meko - ukuxhalaba, ukungonwabi, ukunganeliseki ngobomi.
Unyango . Enye yeendlela eziqhelekileyo zonyango kunokuthiwa ukutyhawula unyango. Ngokomzekelo, eWest, loo mntu unesifo uvalelwa entolongweni ngeveki kwaye, ekhangele esibhakabhakeni ngokusebenzisa isiqwenga, uqala ngokungafaniyo yonke into ejikelezile.
Ukuba zonke iinjabulo zakho zizama, zenze uvuyo komnye umntu. Yaye uya kuvakalelwa ngokukratshi.
Isizathu sesithathu: "amaqhinga" amagama ...
Yonke into ifanelekile kuwe, malunga neliphuphayo, kodwa ukuxhalabisa kukushiya ngeenyawo ezilinganayo kwaye ngenxa yale nto ayikho imini ebonwabileyo ebomini bakho.
Ukuxilongwa : "Umkhuhlane" ngenxa yokulahleka.
Iimpawu : "Sinobutyhefu, imoto isebelwe, inja iyingozi, indlu iyabanjwa ..."
Isiseko soxinzelelo olunjalo, ngokwe-psychologist, kukuba siphila kwilizwe elinokungaqiniseki kongezwe, okusemthethweni, okwenza i-psychosis enkulu. Ngendlela, lowo unento enokulahlekelwa yintliziyo, ininzi kakhulu. Kwaye ukuba uhlala njalo ulinde ngomso ukuba ube "isiphelo sehlabathi", uyayifumana phi, le ntonwabo kunye nenjabulo ekuphumeleleni kwamhla?
Unyango . Ewe, ukuthula kwihlabathi lonke, asinakuphendula, kungakhathaliseki ukuba bakufuna kangakanani. Kusenako ukusekela i-oasis yethu yozinzo kuthi, kuba njalo kunokwenzeka ukuqinisekisa indlu, imoto, ukubeka imali kwi-bhanki ethembekileyo, njl. Zama ukwenza oku, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo uya kunciphisa "ukubandezeleka" kwakho!
Isizathu sesine: ubuxoki!
Umsebenzi wakho ufana nefilimu ekhangayo yemoto apho udlala indima ephambili. Kodwa ngokukhawuleza xa uqala ukuvuyisana ngempumelelo, ngokukhawuleza uphosa umonde: "Yintoni eyoyivuyisa? Abanye kwiminyaka yam sele sele umlawuli! Yilapho ndiphakamisa mna, ngoko ndiya kuvuya ... "
Ukuxilongwa : "ukulibazisa" uvuyo.
Iimpawu : "Ewe, umntu unokuvuya njani ebomini xa izitya zingahlambulukanga (ingxelo ayinikiweyo, ingakulungele, ikhosi, njl)? Apha ke ... "
"Yonke ke ngoko" ngamagama anika ithemba kwaye ikhutshwe kwikhoneni elide kunye nentonwabo kwizinto ezikhoyo ngoku. Ngendlela, kunokuthi kwenzeke ukuba "ukujuluka" okunjalo sele kunenzuzo kuwe.
Unyango . Le ngqiqo yokukhohliswa phakathi kwabantu abanoxanduva banokukudonsa iminyaka emininzi. Ngendlela, umntwana akalokothi aphuphe ukuthanda kwakhe "kwikhoneni elide" aze adibanise zonke iithayi endaweni kwaye athole amahlanu athileyo emathematika, kunye nalo udumo oluvela kubazali bakhe.
"Ngoku kwaye nangu!" - eli nqaku liye lisoloko lusekelwe ebuntwaneni obonwabileyo. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba uphathe ubomi bonke ithuba lokunandipha imininingwana yeenkcukacha ezincinci zobomi: ukuvuya ngosuku olushushu, ukuhlangana kunye nabahlobo, ngeveki kunye nayo yonke into ekwazi ukuzisa uxolo. Kwaye ukulinda "ulwandle lwemozulu" ngokuqinisekileyo akuyi kuzisa uvuyo olukhulu.
Isizathu sesihlanu: intlungu
Uhlala ujwayele ukububula malunga nokuba "awuyi kuba ngaphezu kwakho". Awusoze ube nemoto efana no-Olga, ulayini lwezitolo ezifana no-Svetlana ... Ngamanye amazwi, kuphela abantu ababaziyo banelungelo lokunandipha ubomi, kodwa awunabo umntu ofanelekileyo!
Ukuxilongwa : "ukusilela".
Iimpawu : "Kunenzuzo yokuba abanye bahlale njengale ..."
Yimangalisa njengoko kubonakala ngathi, iinjongo ezibaluleke kakhulu kuzo zonke iinkanuko ze-jivas zibhekwa njengento ebonakalisa intlungu ebukhulu bentlalo yolonwabo xa kuthelekiswa nolonwabo lwabanye abantu. Njengomthetho, ukunyanisekileyo kubhekana ne-bulimia yobomi, kwaye abantu abanomona bahlala bephupha ngokuphila kangcono kunomnye umntu.
Unyango . Kuyaziwa kubo bonke ukuba kunzima kakhulu ukuvuya ngakumbi kunomnye umntu. Ngoko, emva koko, akufuneki ukwenza oku, kwaye kufuneka uphile ubomi bakho ngaphandle kokujonga impumelelo yabanye?
Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, ndifuna ukongeza, ubu budenge bubuhle, ngaphandle kokuphuhliswa kwengcamango yokuhlanza akupheli. Ngako oko, ukuqinisekisa ukuba i-swamis enjalo ayenzekanga, ukhuthazwa kakhulu ukuba uhambe ngokutya "okonwabileyo": ukunciphisa inani lezinto zokuzonwabisa, kunye nesiganeko esithatha injabulo kunye nolonwabo "ukuhlafuna" ngononophelo kwaye ixesha elide! Akunangqiqo ukukhumbula kwakhona elinye lamagama alumkileyo kaBernard Shaw, obiza ukuba abathembekileyo baphupha amaphupha;