Ininzi yabameli besifazane bayaqiniseka ukuba amadoda ebudlelwane bezocansi banesidingo esisodwa. Le ngcamango iphosakeleyo. Iminqweno yendoda yonke ikhethekileyo. Ukuba ujonge kuyo ukusuka kwinqanaba leengcinga zengqondo, ngoko ke imibono yabantu kulo mbandela ixhomekeka, inxalenye, kwiqela labo leminyaka. Kwaye ke, izidingo zesini zesini zitshintsha njani kwiminyaka eyahlukeneyo?
Iminyaka engama-20 ukuya kwe-30 ubudala - ukuphakama kobulili
Eli xesha lingabizwa ngokuba ngumlingo wexesha kunye nephutha. Kule minyaka, ukutshintsha amaqabane eentlobano zesini, bafumana amava, okwandisa ukuzithemba nokuzithemba ngabanye. Kubantu balesi sizukulwana, ukulangazelela iiklabhu kunye nokungaziwa ngumpawu. Ukususela apho kulandela isigqibo sokuba ukuzongamela kunye nokwenza umdla kubo, indawo ekhethekileyo kufuneka inikwe ukungaqiniseki. Ngokuphathelele ubudlelwane bezocansi, apha, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuqala. Oku kubandakanya, umzekelo, imidlalo yokudlala indima kunye nayo yonke into edibene nayo.
Kwaye kubalulekile ukuba udlulisele kumlingane wakho, ukunyaniseka kwakho. I-Vosphischenie ukuziphatha kwakhe, izenzo, ukubonakala, umfanekiso, iimpahla, njl.
30-40- ixesha lokukhetha
Kule nkalo yobomi, ubudlelwane bezocansi buninzi obungabalulekanga. Kule nqanaba leminyaka, indoda iqala ukucinga ngezinto ezibaluleke kakhulu ebomini bakhe, ukuvavanya iinjongo kunye neemfuno. Ngoko ke, kwindawo yokuqala, akukho nto ibonakala ngayo, kodwa ubuchule bengqondo.
Ngaloo ndlela, kunokugqitywa ukuba izambatho asisona sitshixo sokwenza umdla. Into ebaluleke kakhulu ngumphefumlo, ingqondo, ikhono lokuthetha nokuphulaphula, ukuba ube ngumnxibelelwano olungileyo. Ngako oko, ngobudlelwane nomntu onobudala bendawo, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ngumhlobo. Yamukele njengoko kunjalo. Kulo nyaka ummeli wesondo oqinileyo sele sele sele enqwenele ukuzimisela ukuba yintoni ekulindayo kwimeko yendalo, kwaye, ngokuqinisekileyo, uyazi ukuba yeyiphi na ibhinqa ayifunayo.
Into eyona nto kukuqonda ukuba yiliphi igama elilindele lona, nokuba unako ukuhlangabezana neemfuno kunye nokulindela. Akunzima kakhulu ukudlala indima yomnye umntu.
Ngokubhekiselele kwimpilo yobundlobongela, kweli xesha sele lichazwe, kukho izidingo kunye neminqweno. Ngoko ke, akukho mfuneko yokwakha nantoni na entsha apha. Kufuneka nje ukuba ufumane ingcamango yomntu othandekayo, kunjengekho, kungakhathaliseki ukuba kuqiniseke ukuba ikhona okanye iingubo zangaphambili, nantsi yonke into iyodwa. Ngoko ke, ukuze ulwalamano lube namandla, kubalulekile ukufumana izitshixo kumntu kuzo zonke izicwangciso.
Umdala kunama-45
Eli lixesha apho ukukhwabanisa ngokwesondo kuya kuqala. Ngoko ke, ukuba ubuhlobo obusondeleyo, kubalulekile ukudala umoya othile. Sebenzisa ixesha kunye nendawo ukuze ube yedwa, uzive ungumhlobo, ubambe indlela efanelekileyo. Kwakhona, ukuze i-polovikhotnosheny iphumelele imfuneko yokugcina indlela yokuphila enempilo, kuba kule minyaka, kubanda kubanda. Ngoko ke, ibhinqa kufuneka livuselele isidingo samadoda ngendlela yokuphila enempilo. Ubudlelwane besondo kufuneka buqhutywe ngendlela ehambelanayo kunye nokungafaniyo. Kungenxa yokuba ikhefu elide liyakumlutha kwizinto ezifunekayo zonke. Kwaye ukuhlaziya ubudlelwane beli bakala ngamanye amaxesha kunzima kakhulu, ngoko kungcono ukungavumeli oku.
Kule minyaka ayikho into enqwenela phambili, ngoko kuyimfuneko ukutshintsha izinto ezincinci, eziqala ukubonakala zingabalulekanga. Ingabonakala ibuhlungu, ibubula, iyakhupha, into ixhomekeke ekucingeni kwakho. Kufuneka nje udibanise uhlobo lwe "zest" ukwenzela ukufaka ingqiqo yokuvakalelwa.
Kuyafaneleka ukuba uqaphele ukuba umntu emva kweminyaka engama-45 uvakalelwa kukuba ukuthanda kwakhe ubudlelwane obuthathekayo akufani. Abaninzi kwisicwangciso seengqondo basilungele oku, ezinokuchaphazela izenzo, ukuziphatha, iiminqweno. Apha ungabuyela kwi-original. Ngokufanayo, uneminyaka engama-20 ukuya kwe-30 ngokumalunga nomntu. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthanda indlela yakhe, ukubonakala kwayo, amandla akhe kunye nokuziphatha ngokwesini. Khuthaza zonke iintlobo zemiqweno yesiqingatha sakho kwaye, ungazilibaleki ukuzisa into entsha.
Kufuneka ukhunjulwe ukuba iminyaka engama-45 yobudala engapheliyo, kodwa ngokuchaseneyo, eli lixesha apho amatsha amatsha avuleka phambi kwakho, ithuba lokuqala ukuhlala ngokutsha. Ingaba kukho ukuhamba, uhambo, ukhenketho. Unokuzama into entsha, into eya kuzisa iimvakalelo ezintle kumntu wakho kunye nomntu wakho. Musa ukuzikhanyela oku. Emva koko ubuhlobo bakho abuyi kuhamba, kodwa ngonyaka ngamnye uya kuba namandla.