Kakade, ngamnye umntwana uyazi ukuba ukusela utywala nokubhema ugwayi kuyingozi kwimpilo. Kodwa bambalwa abantu baya kuchaza ukuba yintoni ingozi. Abafundi imihla ngemihla baba ngamangqina apho abantu abadala banxila utywala, umsi, kwiimboniso zethelevishini phantse yonke ifilimu ibonisa utywala kunye nokutshaya.
Umntwana akafuni nje ukuzibiza njengomntu osemtsha kwaye uzive njengomntu omdala, umlingisa, uqala ukusela nokutshaya. Ngoko ke kubantwana kukho ukukhulelwa kwengqondo ngenxa yengcaciso ephikisanayo ngokubhema notywala. Kwaye esinye isizathu sokuba abantwana besikolo bazame utywala kunye noogwayi. Bazibuza ukuba zithintela njani umzimba.
Into ebalulekileyo kukuba umntwana wakho afunde onke amaqiniso kunye nosongelo lokusebenzisa izinto ezinobungozi. Musa ukuxhaphaza okanye usongela umntwana wakho. Wonke umntu uyazi ukuba abazali abaninzi banqabela into enokuyenza, baninzi abantwana bafuna ukukwenza. Kubonakala ukuba abaninzi abantwana abaphuza utywala okanye abatshitshise abazali abaqinileyo abangathethiyo ngemikhwa emibi, kodwa banqabela.
Ngenxa yoko, esi siqhamo esinqatshelwe siba mnandi ngakumbi kubantwana, kwaye bazama ukutshaya nokusela ngaphandle kwendlu, ngeendlela zonke befihla abazali babo.
Kuya kuba ngcono xa uthetha ngoxolo ngokuthetha nomntwana wakho malunga nokulimala kotywala nokubhema kwaye ilizwi lakho aliyi kuba "lungekho." Abantwana bakho bafanele bazi ukuba unako ukuthetha njalo kwezi zihloko nganoma naliphi ixesha, kwaye awuyi kuzingca okanye ukuzihlambalaza.
Okokuqala, ngexesha leengxoxo ezingenakuphoqeleka kwaye ezingenyanzelekiyo malunga neengozi zotywala kunye ne-cigarettes, kufuneka uxelele ukuba yintoni utywala kunye nentlaka. Emva koko kufuneka kucaciswe ukuba abanye abantu basebenzise kakubi utywala baze bashiye umsila nangona kubonakaliswe ukulimala kwezi mveliso kwimpilo. Xelela ukuba nayiphi na into, ngaphandle kwemveliso yokutya, ibonakale kumzimba womntu, inokubonakala iyingozi kwimpilo yabantu. Emva koko, kufuneka kuthethwe ukuba le miba emibi ingakhokelela ekuphuculweni kwemisebenzi yomzimba, ukutyhafaza impilo, ngamanye amaxesha ukukhokelela kwisiphumo esibulalayo. Kwaye okubaluleke kakhulu, yithi xa uqala ukusela okanye ukutshaya, kuya kuba nzima ukuqeda ukuxhomekeka kwengqondo kunye nokwenyama.
Ngoko, iingcebiso zethu kubazali.
Xa uneminyaka eyi-8, kuyimfuneko ukuhlala ngokukodwa malunga namanqaku alandelayo:
- ukutya, utswala, iziyobisi kunye negwayi - ezi zinto zihluke ngokupheleleyo;
- ngamanye amaxesha abantu banokusela isiselo esincinci, kwaye umntwana akayiyo, ngenxa yokuba utywala unobungozi ekuveleni kwengqondo kunye nezinye izitho zomzimba womntwana;
- abadala banokutshaya, kwaye abantwana abakwenzi, njengoko oku kungakhokelela kwizifo ezininzi ezahlukahlukeneyo kwizikolo zesikolo, kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu kuba abantwana abakhulanga kwi-cigarettes;
Izidakamizwa ziwonakalisa umzimba womntu, ngoko banqatshelwe ukuba badle naluphi na ubudala.
Xa uneminyaka eyi-11:
- ulwazi malunga neengozi zotywala, iziyobisi kunye nokubhema kufuneka zandise kwaye zibe nzima kakhulu;
- kuyimfuneko ukuchazela amaqiniso angenakunyanikiweyo ngendlela yengxoxo. Abantwana kweli nqanaba badityaniswe nolwazi kwaye abawamkeli iziyalezo;
- Sitshele ukuba abanye abantu abadala banokuxhomekeka kwintsholongwane kwimikhwa emibi;
- ukusetyenziswa kotywala okanye ugwayi kubangela umonakalo omkhulu emiphakeni, ubuchopho, isibindi kunye nezinye izitho.
Ezinye iingcebiso malunga nokukhusela umntwana kwimikhwa emibi:
1. Abazali bafanele bathathe inxaxheba ebomini babantwana babo. Kule meko, amathuba okuba abantwana abawela kwiimeko ezingathandekiyo kunciphisa. Abantu abadala kufuneka bazi zonke izihlobo zabantwana babo, apho bahamba khona noko bakwenzayo. Zama ukubamema ekhaya ngokuphindaphindiweyo. Vumela ukudlala kakuhle ekhaya phantsi kweliso lakho.
Sebenzisa ixesha elininzi kunye nabantwana. Thetha ngeminqweno yabo, baxhaswe kuyo nayiphi na imizamo.
3. Nceda uncedise abantwana kwisicelo sokuqala. Umntwana kufuneka abe nomuvo obaluleke kakhulu.
4. Nika umntwana wakho kwicandelo lezemidlalo okanye udlale imidlalo yemidlalo ngokwakho. Abantwana besikolo, abahlala behlala kwinto ethile, babe nexesha elincinane namandla okutshaya okanye ukusela utywala.
5. Ukuxhobisa abaselula ngemisebenzi yasekhaya okanye i-dacha. Imisebenzi iyabavumela ukuba bazive benxalenye yentsapho kwaye baqonde ukubaluleka koko bakwenzayo. Abantwana abanomdla wokubaluleka kwabo, kwiimeko ezinqabileyo, baqale ukusela nokutshaya.
6. Khusela abantwana ekubukeni iifilimu kunye neenkqubo, apho abantu abadala kunye, ngokukodwa, abatsha abasasa nokusela utywala.
7. Okona kubaluleke kakhulu, ungalokothi uphuze okanye ungabambi phambi koonyana bakho. Emva koko, uninzi lwabo bonke bakuxelisa.
Ngoku uyazi indlela yokuxelela umntwana ukuba utywala, iziyobisi kunye nokutshaya kuyingozi. Sithemba ukuba ikhosi yethu, apho sathetha malunga neempawu ezikhethekileyo zoncedo olubanzi kwiintsapho apho abantwana basebenzisa utywala, iziyobisi, kuya kukunceda ukuphepha le ngxaki.