Bathi ezo zichasi ziyakhanga. Ngokuqhelekileyo amadoda akhetha ngokuchasene ngokupheleleyo kumtshato. Abaqhankqalazi bashada ngamantombazana asekhaya, iintsapho ezinengqiqo, kunye namakhwenkwe ahloniphekileyo abathobekileyo bakhetha amakhosikazi abo kunye neengonyama zezilwanyana zabafazi babo.
Kodwa kuqala kubo bonke abantu batshabalale abo bafazi abaxhaswa yithembekileyo yindoda enokuyakha inxulumano yokwenene nentlonelo, intsapho yokwenene.
Kodwa ke, sinokuzibandakanya njani na manani, ngokubhekisele kuyo kuphela imitshato engama-10 kwimizuzu eyi-100 ephethwe ngothando. Ukukhetha umfazi wakhe nomama wabantwana bakhe besikhathi esizayo, umntu uzenzele iinkqubo zokuba umfazi wakhe ozayo uza kufana. Ngokuqhelekileyo abo bayithandayo akayazi indlela yokudala ukucoceka, akafuni abantwana, abazi ukulima, njalo njalo njalo njalo. Okokuthi, intombi ethandekayo ayihambelani nomfanekiso womfazi nomama onobuhle. Apha, kwiimeko ezinje, amadoda athile abatshata nabasetyhini abafanisana nabo. Njengoko bethetha, zinyamezela-ziya kuthandana.
Abantu abaninzi abanomdla bafuna ukulungela ixesha elide. Kodwa akukho zizathu kweli hlabathi. Kwaye ndifanele nditshatile amadoda enokungathembeki kwabo baxhomekeke ngokukhawuleza kwaye bahambelane naloo mhle.
Ngethuba lethu, amaxesha amaninzi abafazi abatshatileyo ngokubalwa, kodwa nabasetyhini bashada ngenxa yezizathu ezifanayo. Ukubala kungaba yimali, kunye nemisebenzi, kunye nokubala kokuthandwa kunye nodumo kuluntu. Olu luhlu alupheliyo. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, indoda iya kutshata ukuze ifumane inzuzo ethile kwindlela yokubala. Akunjalo ukuba ngumfazi otshatayo, thanda, into ephambili kukuba umkholelwe okanye umbonise inzuzo kunye neenzuzo ezifumana kulo mtshato. Akumangalisi ukuba kukho ilizwi: "Ukuqala ukutshata ngenxa yothando, okwesibini ukulungeleka, okwesithathu umkhwa".
Amadoda amaninzi ashada nomfazi wokuqala onesizungu esitratweni kuba ixesha lifikile kwaye bonke abahlobo nabazali baxininisa ukuba bafanele batshata. Bonke abahlobo abakujikelezile banemindeni, kwaye wena ungomnye umqeqeshi okhangeleka kakuhle. Apha, kwaye uqala ukulinganisela indlela yokuphila yobomi kunye noxinzelelo lwabanye.
Kukho izizathu ezininzi zokuba amadoda atshate abafazi besinye uhlobo okanye omnye. Oku kukukhulelwa komfazi kule ndoda, kunye noloyiko lwakhe lobuninzi ekuguga, kunye noxinzelelo lwabazali, kunye nokungazinzi kokuphila kunye nomnqweno wokutshintsha into ebomini, ukuzama into entsha, ubomi bentsapho kule meko. Konke oku kunokwenza intsapho efanelekileyo kuluntu, ukubonakala kwintsapho, kodwa kwintsapho enjalo ayiyi kuba yintando. Ubuninzi obunokwenzeka kuloo mtshato inhlonipho kunye nokunyamekela kuphela kunye nomnqweno womtshato womntu.
Kodwa kukho nawaphi na amabhinqa abafazi abatshatileyo, sithemba ukuba bayokutshata ngenxa yothando olukhulu. Musa ukuziphika uthando, vula kuye. Kwaye ke nguwe oya kuba ngumfazi oshade naye ngokuthandana. Ungazami ukusebenzisa iindlela ezi ngasentla ukutshata nomntu oyithandayo. Akukho nto iya kuvela kuyo. Lindela uthando lwakho kunye naloo mntu ungatshatanga. Yonke into inexesha layo, njengoko lisithi.