Kungenxa yintoni enokuthi uphantsi kwakho?
Iingcali zengqondo zithanda ukutsho ukuba ukuhlolwa okuphantsi kwakho ngoku kungumphumo wemfundo engafanelekanga yomntwana ebuntwaneni. Emva koko, ezininzi iingxaki ezikhoyo ngoku zihlobene ngokusondeleyo nakwizinto ezidlulileyo. Ukuthi ukuzithemba kwangaphakathi kunokuxhomekeke kwinto yokuba abazali bezikhonkwane zabazali bayincoma umntwana omncinci, ngokugqithiseleyo, babebizwe kwaye bahlala begxeka. Ngokuqhelekileyo, utata okanye unina unakho ukubonisa ukungazange ayenze okanye umsindo kumntwana. Ngenxa yoko, umntwana uyakhula, ezingelwa kwaye akhule ngokungabi nantlonelo. Ukuze ungaziphinda uphinde abazali abaphosakeleyo, kufuneka kuhlale khunjulwa ukuba nayiphi na umntu ifuna intlonelo, nokuba yindodana okanye intombi yakho encinane. Dumisani umntwana, ukhule kwindawo yokufudumala, isisa kunye nothando, nokuba unobomi obunzima. Ndikholelwe, kwikamva umntwana uya kukubulela kuphela.
Esinye isizathu sokuzithoba kunokuthi singabi ngabazali, kodwa impembelelo yoluntu. Kwakhona, isizathu sokuba nesimo sengqondo senu sinokubonakala sinye kwincwadi, kodwa kungabi nzulu, kodwa kwixesha elivisayo. Abaselula bazama ukuzityhila ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, ukubonakalisa "I" yabo. Kodwa, njengommiselo, emva kokubonakaliswa okubonakalayo kobuntu bodwa akukaze kubekwe psihika ngokupheleleyo, eyamkela kakhulu umbono wabanye. Kulula kakhulu intombazana okanye intombazana "eyahlukileyo" kwiontanga zabo, inokuxhomekeke ekugxekeni nasekunyelaneni yontanga. Amahlaya aseBrutal of school classmates, ukuhleka usulu. ... Ingqondo yengane engaqinisekanga iyakwazi "ukuphuka" ekuhlaselweni okunjalo kootshaba ngabaontanga kwaye ngenxa yoko, intombazana iya kuba neengxaki ezininzi kunye nokungaqiniseki.
Kwakhona, njenge-nistranno, kodwa isizathu sengqondo esilungileyo ngawe sinokuba yinto engathandekiyo, umnqweno wokuthi awufani nezinto zonke onento ephosakeleyo kuwo wonke umntu. Ngokomzekelo, njengokuba kuyaziwa, isiqingatha esihle sabantu sichaswa kakhulu ukubonakala kunye nomfanekiso. Ibhinqa inokuqiniseka ukuba imilenze yakhe embi ayifani. Uya kuhlala ehambelana nabanye abameli besini sakhe, kunye nemifanekiso ekwiphepha lephephancwadi, kunye nama-actresses kwiimifanekiso zeTV. Njengomthetho, kulula ukuba umntu abone iingenelo kumntu, kodwa kuye, kukho iingxaki. Akunakwenzeka njalo ukuba uthinte ukubonakala okanye umzobo, umntu unokuzicingela ngokwabo ngokwaneleyo, engathandabuzekiyo, kungekhona umntu ozonwabisa. Kulo ntloko, kuya kuba neengcamango zokuba umntu uyonwabile, athathwe ngakumbi kwaye unentliziyo.
Yintoni endiyenzayo ukuba ndilahle ukuzithoba?
Okokuqala, kufuneka uzithande. Ewe, ewe. Kungenzeka ukuba uvile ezi zihlandlo ezininzi okanye uthabatha kanye kwincwadi ethile eyaziwayo yesazi sengqondo esaziwayo. Kulula ukuthi: "Zithande", uya kuthi, xa usuchithe yonke into yokuba ucinga ukuba unesifuba esincinci, iindlebe ezithandayo okanye ukungahleleki. Kodwa enyanisweni, inyaniso ngokwenene ukuthanda nokwamkela ngokwakho, ngendlela oyiyo. Ewe, ekuqaleni kuya kuba nzima. Kodwa njengoko besithi, ngaphandle kobunzima awuyi kukhupha intlanzi kunye nedonki. Kuthatha ixesha lokuba usebenze rhoqo, ukukholwa kuwe kwaye kuya kuvela okufanayo! Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba kule mzuzu, kwaye kungekhona nje kuphela, uyathandwa kwaye uyathandwa ngabantu. Sifanele siqaphele ukuba njengokuba kungekho zimbali ezimbini ezifanayo, zikho abantu abafanayo. Kubalulekile ukuba uzame ukuthanda iimpazamo zakho kwaye ungazenzeli nje iimfanelo zabo, kodwa zenze i-feature yabo ekhethekileyo, into ehlukile.
Zama imihla yonke ukuze uzincoma, ukuzidumisa. Ewe, ngokukhawuleza awukwazi ukuphumeza, ngenxa yokuba uphila iminyaka emininzi, uxinzezelekile. Kwaye uphinda uphinda uyancoma imihla ngemihla, zama ukuva impendulo enhle malunga nawe kwabanye abantu. Kwaye ngolunye usuku, ngolunye usuku, xa umzimba wakho uqala ukuqonda izibongozo zakho, kwaye kamva uya kuqala ukukholelwa ukuba uyingqayizivele kwaye awunakwenzeka. Kuyaziwa ngokubanzi ukuba xa umntu exelelwa ngekhulu ephindwe kabili ingulube, ke yena usekhokheni. Kwaye kutheni singenakuqala ukuzama ukuzithethelela thina, ukuzidumisa?
Ungalokothi uzimelele! Akukho. Nangona ukwenene wenze impazamo - kulungile, xelela nje ukuba ngexesha elizayo xa unako konke kuya kwenzeka!
Jonga ngoko ukhangeleka ngayo: ngokuqinisekileyo unamahlombe athile kunye nentloko yehla. Kufuneka kuthiwa yinto ephawulekayo kubo bonke abantu abanokuzithoba. Gxininisa amahlombe akho, phakamisa ikhanda lakho kwaye ujonge phambili-phambili kwixesha elitsha, elizayo.
Ngelishwa, kuluntu lwakho kukho inokuba "unomdla" onokuhlala ekugxeka, ehlekisa ngawe okanye, njengoko kunokwenzeka ukutsho namhlanje, "troll". Ewe, kuyafaneleka ukuthobela ingqalelo ekugxeka i-nadovoy, ukuya kumahlaya anele kunye nokunyathelisa ngomusa. Kodwa ukuba umntu uwela umgca, akumele uzinyamezele. Ndixelele ngokuthe ngqo ukuba awuyithandi kwaye kwisigqibo sokugqibela, uyeka ukuthetha nomntu. Kunoko, yena ngokwakhe unezixhobo ezinokwaneleyo.
Cacisa ngokucacileyo oko ungazithandayo. Wena, inene, unokuphendula loo nto. Kodwa kufuneka ukhangele izinto. Ukuba kwenziwe, akukho nto ikuthintela ukuba ulahlekelwe ngamakhilogremu angaphezulu. Yiya kugqirha, ugqibe isizathu sokuba ubunzima bakho bunzima. Sebenza kuwe. Akukho mntu unokuzilamba ngokwabo okanye ukutya okulambileyo. Ungadla yonke into, kuphela ngokumodareyitha. Ukongeza kwisondlo esifanelekileyo, ukuzivocavoca umzimba kuya kuphucula kuphela iziphumo zakho. Kwaye ke, ungakhohlwa ukuzibonga ngomsebenzi owenziweyo. Kananjalo ukhumbule ukuba uyakuthanda ngendlela oyiyo. Emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa uza kubona umphumo.
Ukuba unesikhalazo malunga nombonakalo wakho, oku akuthethi ukuba awukwazi ukwenza ngaphandle koononophalali weplastiki. Usuvele uhle, kodwa awukwazi ngako okwamanje. Futhi ungakholelwa kuwe. Ungakulibali ukuzijonga, ngokuba ngisho neenwele ezicocekileyo kakuhle kunye nekhanda elikhanyayo lobuso lingakhuthaza ukuzithemba okuthile, kwaye kwimiba yokwandisa ukuzithemba, akukho nanyathelo elungileyo.
Kwaye, soloko unesimo sengqondo esihle, zifumanisa i-pastime eyintandokazi, iincwadi zokufunda, uhamba rhoqo rhoqo emoyeni omtsha, ncokola nabantu abathandekayo kuphela, nidle ngokufanelekileyo, cingani kakuhle kwaye nizenzele izinto zonke izinto ezilungileyo kunye ezimangalisayo! Funda ukuvuya ebomini, zifunde ukuzithanda! Kuzo zonke ziya kuvela!