Ngokwemvelo, ukuba intombazana encinane ingenayo indoda yokuqala, iya kuwuqhathanisa neyaphambili. Akunandaba nokuba uthelekise kangakanani, into ephambili akuyikuxelela lo mntu uyintanda ngaye, inokumcaphukisa nokumcaphukisa. Kunokwenzeka kuphela ukuthetha ngokuthe ngqo malunga neentlupheko ezidlulileyo ezikufaneleke ngakumbi, malunga neenzuzo ze-boyfriend yangaphambili, xa uqaphela ukuba akuyena iqhawe lenveli yakho kwaye awuyi kuphumelela nayo. Oku, mhlawumbi, yindlela ephela eqinisekisa ngokukodwa ukwahlukana. Ukuthelekiswa akukwamkelekanga, kumcaphukisa indoda, kwaye akayi kuyenza. Naliphi na ukukhankanywa kwamanye amaqabane asekuqaleni kufuneka agwenywe, nangona ayenesimo esibi. Oku kunokubangela ukukrokrelwa kwendoda ukuba usayikhumbula lomntu. Iingcamango zabantu zingenza imifanekiso embi, ngezinye izikhathi zibi kunokuba ngumfazi. Umfana wakho wosuku namhlanje unokuqala ukucinga ukuba "yindoda ekhutshwe ngayo", ukuba "uya kumphonsa" kunye nezinto ezinjalo. Ngoko, akukho mabali, iinkumbulo kunye nezikhokelo kumadoda adlulileyo!
Inomdla ebomini bendoda esedlulileyo iyaqondakala kwaye ichanekile, kodwa akufanelekile ukuwela imida kwaye uqale ukuthelekisa ngokwakho kunye nentombazana yangaphambili kwaye wenze izigqibo ezingalunganga. Ukuba ude ubude bunezifuba ezinkulu, kwaye unomqolo omncinci obomvu, oko akuthethi ukuba uyamthanda kakhulu umntu. Unayo nawe ngoku! Akunjalo naye. Ukubonakala - kulungile, kodwa ngobomi udinga abafazi abafani ngokupheleleyo. Ukuba umfana wakho uhlala ebiza kwaye ebhala kwakhona kunye naye, ungenzi izigqibo ngokukhawuleza kwaye ulungiselele ukuhlaziya emgangathweni. Kufuneka ube nobulumko nokuzola ngexesha elidlulileyo elidlulileyo, akukho nto yashiywe. Ukuphanda ngemibuzo kunye nemibuzo malunga nexesha elidlulileyo kuya kuphoqa indoda ukuba ifihle ngisho neenkcukacha ezingenacala kunye nobomi obuvela ebomini bakhe obudlulileyo. Cinga ukuba kwenzekani xa ufunda ngabo? Ugqiba ekubeni loo mntu wayeqambe amanga kuwe kwaye wakhohlisa ukuba uzive evakalelwa yintombazana yangaphambili. Kodwa ewe, wena ngokwakho umele uxanduva lokuba waqala ukufihla konke kuwe. Musa ukwenza uphando malunga nobomi bendoda yakho yangaphambili! Kudala kwaye akunandaba!
Ngokuhlonela, ukuhlonelana kunye nokuthembela kubaluleke kakhulu. Ngaphambi kokuba ufunde le leta, ngene ephaketheni, fumana ifowuni kunye nokunye ukungenelela ebomini bomntu, uhlale phantsi uze ucinge. Ngaba ulungele ukwazi yonke inyaniso? Ngaba uya kuvuyela ukuba umfana wakho ufikelele ebhokisini lakho le-imeyile, kwisikhwama sakho kwifowuni? Kwimeko yeshwele, nangona i-SMS engabonakaliyo ingaqondwa ngenye icala, eya kubangela ukugxeka kunye nokuxoshwa, ngokukodwa ukuba ngumyalezo ovela kwintombazana yangaphambili apho indoda yakho isebenza okanye njengabangane nje. Zenzele isimo sengqondo ukuba ukuba umntu unawe kwaye uyakuthanda, ngoko akayi kuxoka aze akukhohlise. Ngokuqinisekileyo, kunzima ukuzilumko xa iimvakalelo ziphuma esikolweni, kodwa zonke malunga nokuqeqeshwa namava. Uthando aluvumeli ukuhlola!
Musa ukuthetha kakhulu ngexesha elidlulileyo, kodwa kunoko, ungathethi nonke? Kutheni umvusa umntu ukuba athethe ibali malunga nolwalamano oludlulileyo, ingakumbi ukuba uyazi ukuba uya kuphazamiseka kwaye ungathandeki? Emva kokuxoxwa kunye nakwexesha elidlulileyo, kulungele ukususa ngokusisigxina esi sihloko kwibhokisi elikude kwaye ungalokothi ufumane khona. Musa ukwenza umntu uthelekise wena kunye nentombi yangaphambili ebhedeni, ngokwemvelo, ngekhono lokupheka nokucoca, ngokuphumelela emsebenzini kunye njalo. Kutheni ufuna le nto? Ukufunda ukuba uphelele ngakumbi kunokokuqala, uya kuba neentukuzelo, ukucaphuka kunye nomsindo, ingxoxo yakho iyingozi ekugqibeleni. Khumbula ukuba ukuba indoda yakho ifuna ukuba neyintombi yangaphambili, wayengayi kuhlala phambi kwakho ngoku.
Yazi indlela yokwahlula phakathi kwexesha elidlulileyo nelikhoyo. Makuvumeleke ubudlelwane obudlulileyo, iziganeko, iimvakalelo kunye namava okudlulileyo. Ukuba umntu wakho usabhala uthando lwe-sms-ki kuqala kwaye uyabhalisela "umntwana wakho, ndiyamanga", akuthethi nto! Kuthetha nje ukuba abantu banomfudumalo kunye neenkumbulo ezimnandi kwixesha elidlulileyo, elingenanto enxulumene naloo nto, kwaye, ngokukodwa, ikamva. Xa umntu esondele kuwe, ngoko uyakuthanda kwaye uyavuya ngayo yonke into, akayi kuphinda abuyele kwixesha elidlulileyo, kuba mhlawumbi sele ebenamathuba anjalo ngaphambili.