Kungekudala okanye kamva, kungakhathaliseki ukuba ubuhlobo obuhle kangakanani, sibhekene nesidingo sokubonisa imida yethu. Ukuthi "hayi" kwisibonelelo okanye kumntu, sonke sicinga ukuba singatsho njani kwaye singaziva sinetyala . Kodwa le ngcinga yecala ivela phi? Ngaba asilunganga ngokukhusela umbono wethu, yintoni ebalulekileyo okanye ebiza kakhulu?
Impendulo engokwemvelo, echazwe ngqiqo: asinakuthi "ewe." Izenzo ezininzi kunye nezigqibo kule hlabathi ziqulethe iimpendulo ezimbini kuphela: okanye ewe okanye cha. Akunakwenzeka ukuba udideke.
Kwale meko, ukungakwazi ngenxa yecala lokuthi "cha" ngokucacileyo kwaye ngokukhawuleza - kuchithe ixesha, imali, ubudlelwane obubi. Ukushiya impendulo, sithatha uxanduva olupheleleyo malunga nokuzaliseka kwe "mission" eyabelwe. Emva koko baya kuthisisela ... nantoni na! Ndingathini ukuba andi kwaye ndingaziva ndetyala?
Ivela phi iwayini ngenxa yegama elilula elithi "cha"?
Ukuphepha ukuphendula impendulo ayiyiyo impendulo. Okanye akunakuthathwa njengakho. Kodwa ukuphendula njengokuba kunjalo, unokubeka engozini ubuhlobo ... okanye akunjalo?
Enyanisweni, yonke into yinkimbinkimbi kakhulu. Inokwenzeka ukuba, ukwesaba ukutshabalalisa ubudlelwane kukho imfuneko ethile - le ntliziyo ayizange ithathe "naphi", kodwa yenziwa ngamava akho. Kodwa ukuphazamisa kwimpendulo, ucebisa ukuba "wenze ngomso" okanye uphendule "Ndiya kuzama, kodwa andiqinisekisi", ubeka ubudlelwane kwisiteleka nangaphambili.
Ngamnye angavuleki "Mhlawumbi ngelinye ixesha", uthethwa ngumnqweno wokungazilimazi umnxibelelwano, ukhohlise abantu ababini kanye. Omnye ukhohliswa ngokulindela, ixesha lakhe lichithwa ngokungahloneli. Uyabona ngoncedo okanye inkxaso, ingqwalasela okanye isisombululo seengxaki zakhe. Kwaye uzingela umthwalo owongezelelweyo - ubuncinane bokuziphatha. Emva kwakho konke, xa unxibelelwano ushiya, uya kuhlutywa ngokungathandabuzeki nangokuthi "udibana".
Ngenxa yoko, bobabini kunye nomnxibelelwano, abantu ababini bachithe ixesha labo, kunokuba bathathwe ngokukhawuleza bonke "i". Umzekelo obalaseleyo ngumemo kumhla. Intombazana imenywa kumntu ongeyomdla kuye. Mhlawumbi uyaziqinisekisa ngelinye ilanga uya kuba nomdla kuye ... Ewe, kwaye akunakunqwenela ukuyeka ngokukhawuleza amabango amnandi ngexesha lakhe ...
Kodwa nangona ebeka endaweni engafanelekanga "cha" endaweni yokuthi "Namhlanje ndixakekile" okanye "Mhlawumbi elinye ixesha?", Oku akuyi kutshintsha amaqiniso, kwaye uya kuba neentloni.
Ukususela kokwenqaba thina asiqinisekisiwe - kungekho kwisimo sengqondo, okanye kwishishini, okanye kwintsapho. Ukuqaphela ukwesaba ukungaphumeleli, esiyifumene nayo, asinakukhawuleza ukuba "nceda" umntu. Ngokusoloko sikhuthaza abantu, endaweni yokuhamba.
Ngoko kuvela ukuba umnqweno wokuba ulungile awunakulungele. Nangona kunjalo, kuba abantu abanjalo kukho enye indlela yokuphuma - ukudibanisa nabalawuli, amanyathelo angqongqo, kunye namagqwetha ...
Ukususela esemncinane, igama elithi "hayi"
Phakathi kwamazwi okuqala afundiswa ngabantwana, kukho igama elithi "hayi". Ngaba uqaphele into enjalo? Inomsebenzi wayo obalulekileyo. Yakha imida phakathi komntu kunye nabanye abantu, phakathi kwabantu kunye nehlabathi. Yonke into ethi "nizya" ayikhuselekanga okanye ayikwazi. Ukuthi "hayi", umama ukhusela umntwana kwizinto azidingayo. Kwaye ngexesha elifanayo, phantse yonke "i-nizya" umntwana unayo "ZYA!"
Kuphela ukuba sibadala, sinamahloni phambi kwamandla alo "cha." Ungazami kwakhona kwaye uzive, ubeke ngokuthobeka, ungakhathazeki. Kodwa njengoko i-asphalt ichaza ngokucacileyo ukuba "hayi" emadolweni omntwana, ngoko ke, ukuba sinokuqiniseka ngokuchanekileyo "wethu", sinelungelo kwaye kufuneka sithande.
"Cha"
Kodwa akusiyo yonke into "e" ayibuhlungu okanye ibuhlungu. Kwaye ukuba ufuna ukuthetheka kwaye ungaziva unetyala, zama ukuqala ukucinga malunga nesimo segama elithi "cha". Nazi nje imizekelo embalwa.
- "Ngaba ifudumala ngaphandle?" -Aye. (Inyaniso yendalo yemvelo, akukho nto enokuyenza, kuya kufuneka ugqoke ngokufudumele ngokwale meko)
- - Ngaba unyoko sele sele ufike? -Aye. (Isitimela okanye ibhasi ayikwazi "ukuqhutyelwa" ngomnqweno omnye nje, ukuze umntu afike ngokukhawuleza)
Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, isakramente:
- "Uyandithanda?" -Aye. (Le yinyaniso ebomini: "Ukwenza ukuba uthandane ngothando" akusayi kuphinda kusebenze, ngokucacileyo, kulungele ukuvumela umntu ukuba ahambe)
Eyona nto ilula, yinyani, impendulo ethi "hayi", ukuba ayithwali ngokwayo ayinayo okanye ayibi. Njengempendulo kumbuzo olula. Kodwa yonke imibuzo iyasikhathaza, mhlawumbi asiyi kubabuza? Ukusuka kwenye "engekho" kuyimvakalelo eninzi, kwaye kwezinye - isitatimende esicacile se nyaniso.
Impendulo ilula: musa ukuzisa nto into engathandabuzekiyo kwi "cha" yakho, kwaye awuyi kuba nomoya ongenetyala ngenxa yento.
Zininzi iindlela ezintle zokuthi "hayi" kwaye ungaziva unetyala.
- "Andikwazi ngoku" (oku kuthetha ukuba emva koko kuya kuba sekwephuzile kakhulu). Ukuba ungeze uxolo, ngoko umbuzo ngokwakhe akakwazi ukuthukuthela umntu odidekile ngesidingo sokwenqaba.
- Ndiyabulela umntu ngokobuchule bakho (ubunamandla, izakhono) zibalulekile kuye. Emva koko, ukwenqaba kuya kuvela kakhulu.
Kukho iindlela ezininzi ezingalunganga zokuthi hayi.
- "Ngenye ixesha" - unganqikazi, baya kubuyela kuwe.
- "Thetha noBasil (Natalie)" - baya kuzama ukukukholisa ngobukhulu bakho, nangona kunjalo kulo mbandela.
- "Mhlawumbi kamva" - umntu uya kusenza indlela engaphezu kweyodwa, ukuze ujongane nengxaki yakhe.