Ngokuqhelekileyo, abaninzi abafazi babecinga ukuba abazalwana babo babe nesibindi, bacinga ukuba akukho nto ebangela ukuba umntu abe noyika. Bathi akufanele bafanele ukuba besoyika nantoni na. Kodwa ngaba oku kwenzeka ntoni ngeli xesha, kwaye kwenzeke ntoni ngokubanzi? Emva koko, ukuba umfazi othembekileyo, onobuqili, kunye novuyo ebemi phambi kwendodakazi, kunzima ukucinga ukuba unokwesaba umfazi. Kodwa le ndoda inayo i-phobias yakhe. Kodwa umntu wokwenene, ngenxa yeengcamango zakhe, akaze azixelele ngabo. Nangona unokuba ne-phobias enjalo xa kuthelekiswa nabasetyhini, baya kuba nzima kakhulu. Kwaye apha, ngenxa yoko, umbuzo uvela malunga nokuba luhlobo luni loloyiko umntu angaba nalo phambi komfazi.
Kuhle kakhulu. Amantombazana amaninzi aqiniseke ukuba ulungile kuye. Kodwa awona onke amantombazana ayaqonda ukuba ininzi yesigxina sesidlangalazana sinokuhlazeka yintombazana enhle kakhulu. Ewe, ukuba ufana nobuhle kwiimagazini ezigcobileyo, kuya kuba soloko uloyiko. Ngaloo ndlela, ukwesaba kuya kugqitywa kwinto yokuba uya kucinga ukuba intombazana enokuyiphonsa kalula ngenxa yesinye isithandwa, isisityebi, isilumko okanye isithembisayo. Kwaye ukwenzela ukuba akwazi ukugcina umfazi onjalo othembisayo, uya kuhlala efuna ukuzama ukulungela into ethile. Kodwa umthwalo onjalo wokuziphatha kunye nomzimba awukwazi ukumelana nomntu ngamnye. Nguye kuphela onokuzithemba, ocebileyo, ohlakaniphile okanye omdala emoyeni onokumelana naluphi na ukuhlaselwa kunye "nokubulawa" kumlingane wakhe omhle. Ukongezelela kukho konke oku, amadoda amaninzi ayesaba ukuba loo mfazi uya kukhanyela. Kwaye kwiindawo ezinjalo abaninzi abanakho ukuvuma.
U buchule. Ngokuqinisekileyo akuyiyo imfihlo kumntu ukuba amadoda amaninzi ayithandi abafazi abahlakaniphile, ngaphandle kobuqili. Kodwa ngelo xesha, amadoda ambalwa akhethe abafazi abangenangqondo, abangafundanga nabangenangqondo. Ngezinto ezinjalo ngamanye amaxesha kunokuba nzima kakhulu, njengama-blondes avela kuma-anecdotes awanakho ukuvula ikhompyutha okanye i-TV. Emva koko akuyi kucacisa ukuba yintoni eyoyikwesaba abantu phambi komfazi. Kuvela ukuba umntu uyethusa ngengqiqo yakhe, kungekhona ngobuqhetseba, ukukhwabanisa, ubuchule kunye namanye amaqhinga akhe amabhinqa. Ngokuqhelekileyo, amadoda ahlonela abafazi abafundayo nabanengqiqo, kodwa kaninzi abayikhethayo njengabalingani babo bobuqu. Ngako oko, sinokugqiba ekubeni kubalulekile ukuba ube yingqiqo, kodwa kufuneka kwakhona ube nobudenge. Emva kwakho konke, indoda iya kuhlala isonwabile ukunceda kwizinto osoke usebenzise okanye wenze into ethile.
Ukusebenza. Le ndoda ayinakuyichukumisa ngakumbi kukuba le ntokazi ibambelele. Emva koko, uya kucinga ukuba intombazana enjalo ayiyi kuba nexesha kuye. Umsebenzi ungabonakaliswa kwinto yokuba intombazana iya kuzama ukuthatha inyathelo lokuqala ekuqaleni kokwazana naye. Emva koko, amadoda awamthandi nje ukuziphatha okunjalo, kodwa soyike loo mabhinqa. Ngokukodwa iphutha eliqhelekileyo le ntombazana emva kwentlanganiso yokuqala kunye nolwazi lomntu luya kuba uqala ukumgcwalisa ngeefowuni okanye kwimilayezo. Ewe, mhlawumbi uya kuqhubeka enxibelelana nomntu okhethekileyo, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo akayi kuba nomnqweno wokuba nolwalamano olunzulu nentombazana enjalo. Kuya kuba ngcono ukuba indoda ithatha yonke into ngesandla, ngokukodwa, iifowuni ize ityumbe iintlanganiso ezilandelayo. Ngoko unako ukuziva uphakamileyo, okanye kunoko amandla akhe omzimba. Emva koko, le nyathelo liyinxalenye yomeleleyo.
Iingxoxo ezingavumelekanga. Amanye amadoda athetha abafazi abakhululeke kakhulu, ngelixa abanye banqwenela ukunikela ingqwalasela kubameli bezithobekileyo kuphela. Nangona kukho uluvo lokuba abaninzi babo basesona sininzi kubasetyhini abashushu, akufuneki ukuba bacinge ukuba kuchanekile. Emva koko, olunye uhlangothi lwengqekembe lungavula apha: indoda ingakwazi ukulahlekelwa indima ephambili kwaye ithathe indima yecala, engaqhelekanga kumadoda. Kwaye ekugqibeleni, amadoda angahle alahlekelwe ukuzithemba. Ngenxa yoko, kukho ukwesaba kubantu, okubandakanya ukungabikho kwabo. Kungcono ukufumana umgangatho ophakathi oya kuhambelana bobabini. Kwakhona, ungamxeleli umntu wakho ngezinto zokuzonwabisa zesondo zangaphambili, ngokukhethekileyo ukumthanda umdumi wangaphambili. Nangona ulungele ukulala ebhedini kuneli qabane langoku. Amagama anjalo angakwazi ukuphazamisa wakho umhlobo wakho kuwe.
Uloyiko alukhethanga kakuhle. Uloyiko olunjalo lukho kwinto yokuba umntu uyamoyika ukwenza ukhetho olubi, oya kuzisola emva koko aze azigwebe. Eyona nto ininzi yakhe iyakhathazeka malunga nokuba isitampu esinqwenela kwiimpepha, loo mfazi uphenduka waba ngumnye umntu, ohluke kakhulu kunamhlanje nakwakudala. Kwaye abanye bayesaba ukuba babe buthathaka kwaye bangazikhuseli, okanye banokwesaba ukungcatsha nokungcatsha. Mhlawumbi, nangona kunjalo, nangona zivakalelwa kakhulu kwaye ziqinileyo, abantu baqala ukuzitshintsha imaski yokungakhathaleli okanye ukungakhathaleli. Emva koko, ngokombono wabo, kuya kuba lula kwaye kuthobekile ngenxa yokuba bajamelana neengxaki ezinokwenzeka. Yaye yintoni na isisombululo kuya kuba sithembeke ngakumbi kwaye singenabuhlungu. Ngabantu abanjalo kuya kuba nzima kunzima, kuba ukuze bavumele ukuba baqonde injongo yabo yokunyanisekileyo kunye nenzulu, kuya kuthatha umzamo omkhulu. Kodwa ukuba umntu uyayifaneleka, ke akufuneki ukuba umlahle.
Khumbula into into yokuba amadoda angabantu abafana nabasetyhini, kuphela abanemithetho yabo, iimbono, izimo zengqondo ebomini, ukwesaba kwabo umfazi. Kufuneka ufunde ukwamkela ininzi yabo ukuba ibe yindoda ethile ebalulekileyo ebalulekileyo kunye nobalulekileyo ebomini bakhe.